Stressed out carer

[Pashmina67]

My partner had 3 seuzures 2 & a half years ago he woke up dellusional and was diagnosed with both dementia alzheimers, the last year has been mind blowing, hes gone out with no clothes, doesnt believe he lives here, became abusive, incontinent and non stop nonsical chatting. I try so hard to distract alter but even putting a news channel on takes him into a fantasy the story is about him. Hes on a lot of meds from the psychitric hospital but its almost like hes wired, you hear a bang hes either fell or is trying to move something heavy, i have a ring device which alerts me hes getting up, or he would empty every draw and waldrobe. The latest is putting clothes down the toilet and weeing wherever, im on eggshells washing every surface with bicarb/lemon as the smell is horrid, the man i knew is not there but hes been so kind generous loving and i made a promise not to put him in home but i feel like i cant cope, i cry and plead with him not to do stuff then feel guilty as he doesnt know what hes doing. Its just me with a visit from community mental health every 2/3 weeks. The bells gone which means hes up after washing him putting him to bed so must go x

It is so hard to care for the person you love but it is no longer the sane person.
My situation is not as extreme as yours but there are times when I inwardly scream at my wife after listening to total rubbish for hours

Okay no way should you feel beholden to your promise here to not seek a care home for him. He sounds like he was a wonderful man; he would definitely not want you to be living this way.

Alzheimer’s has affected people in my family and it’s beyond horrendous. You would not be falling to seek help for his care now.

I know it’s a massive step, but it sounds like things are at crisis point for you. Please seek help for yourself, it sounds like you’ve done amazingly to cope thus far

Thank you i have to as im starting to scold him like a child then feel like a bully, even goimg to shop which is so near when i gey back hes either gone so i run around looking for him, or the house is upside down why he says i never done it it was bobby

It really isn't in his best interests to be trying and failing to live safely at home. For his own safety, health and dignity he needs professional care. The first thing is to get an assessment of his needs and take it from there. Good luck!

We have 2 assessments next week. I have to accept he needs more than i can give thanks for reading my rant

The first line was meant to be "It is so hard to care for the person you love but it is no longer the same person."