3 year old hates 5 point harness

[TheTwirlyPoos]

She was in a Axkid Mini kid but was increasingly uncomfortable, constantly straining and really uncomfortable. So we moved her to front facing (reluctantly as our eldest was RF til 5) and bought her the Joie Bold.

But we have the same problem. She is permanently uncomfortable. Holding the straps, lifting her hips, she seems constantly ill at ease.

Any solutions? I can't buy another car seat. The bold can be used with a belt but she's too young isn't she?

She needs at be at least 15kg legally to use the seatbelt mode in the Bold and Joie recommend at least 3 years.

TBH, I would avoid this at 3 if possible, because very few 3yos are really mature enough to use the seatbelt mode and sit properly, and there is some research from the US showing that children of 30-40lbs (15-18kg) and age 3 are at higher risk when rrestrained by a seatbelt booster compared to children who are 40lb+ (18kg+) and 4+ years. There is also a behavioural component in that when children are pulling the belts and trying to move out of the seat, this is much easier for them in a seatbelt as it doesn't lock like a harness does. So be aware that the problem might persist even in a high backed booster seat.

If she is nearly 4 and already over 18kg then it might be less risky. But you should check the belt routing that it actually goes over her legs/hips rather than her tummy. If you happen to have an actual high backed booster seat (rather than a combo seat) the belt fit may be better in this for a smaller child - e.g. swap older sibling into Bold used as a booster seat.

If we are talking non-ideal solutions, using the rear facing Axkid seat with looser straps might be an option? (You'd have to lock the headrest to prevent the auto-tightening.) Loose straps are not in general a good idea, but in rear facing it's less of an issue due to the fact that it's the seat shell doing the work in restraining the child. If they are totally loose to the point of falling off then that's no use of course, but having them a little slacker than perfect (perfect is up to about 2cm total slack) is not such an issue in a rear facing seat as it is in a forward facing one. How tight are you making them in the Bold?

I know you said no more buying seats but in case you were not aware - there is a type of car seat which uses a shield in front of the child instead to kind of "pin" them into the seat. You can usually trial them in store at Mamas and Papas. They start at about £170. e.g. Cybex Pallas or Joie Shield. In some ways they are less restraining than a 5 point harness, but in other ways they are more restraining, so they don't suit every child. If you did want to try it, it might be a good idea to look at as being more restraint than a seatbelt. OTOH if she is already close to/over 18kg or 105cm then she may have outgrown these seats anyway.

Oh I was hoping you'd reply @BertieBotts . Thank you. She was three 4 months ago so hardly nearly four. I can weigh her tomorrow but I doubt that she is 15kg. We are in the car now and she is writhing about. She hates being RF so the Axkid has gone.

Is there a guide for how tight straps should be?