Biopsy - bricking it

[Awhiya]

Hi all,

I’m not sure why I’m posting here, other than being completely terrified and having no outlet for it. I don’t really want to worry my family before I know for sure. I noticed a lump above my collarbone just before Halloween. My GP’s been great and referred me for an ultrasound, which I had today, and I’ve just had a call to say I’m to see a consultant and have a biopsy.

I have two daughters, 3yo and 4m old. I know it’s premature but I keep thinking about the worst case scenario. I work in healthcare so like to think I have a reasonably balanced attitude about the chances of it being something serious, and the more it trundles on, and the bigger and more uncomfortable the lump gets the more concerned I get.

I guess I’m looking for reassurance from
someone who either might have been here before, to let me know it’s not the end of the world, or that my girls will be ok. Or, even better, that a biopsy on an abnormal lymph node can sometimes come back as nothing. I can’t believe this is happening, and keep thinking I’ll wake up from a nightmare. I don’t want my girls to see me ill, or lose their mum.

Oh poor you I know that feeling of panic about worst case scenario. I only have experience of BC biopsies but I know they can often come back negative or inconclusive. When is your appointment with the consultant and the biopsy?The waiting is torturous and sometimes we put ourselves through hell for nothing or for something that is alot easier to sort out than we’d imagined , but I know it’s really hard not to go down a rabbit hole. Sending you a big warm hand hold.

Ok so you didn't have a consultant do the US?
Most likely 'abnormal' lymph node. If it was more than one then I expect you'd be able to feel it so that's reassuring . There's a set of criteria for lymph nodes - if it doesn't hit all of them or is a bit too prominent then you either come back in 6 weeks or biopsy. 90% is nothing but the neck is easily accessible and so tend to err on the side of caution just in case. Especially if they didn't do the imaging - someone else's is never as good. You might have an MRI too. Anaesthetic like at the dentist. Small nick in the skin and a couple of small needles in. Takes a bit of time but not that bad. Similar to cannula insertion in discomfort. Consultant will either be brusque and kind or bonkers and kind. Most radiologists are. Good luck.

Thank you, really appreciate it. I haven’t got an appointment yet, my GP called me this evening to tell me the consultant had seen the US I had done today and wanted to see me and do a biopsy because it looked abnormal. There wasn’t much more detail than that. I think my GP’s tone sort of worried me a bit. Maybe I was reading too much into it but she just seemed genuinely concerned, asked me how I was in myself etc. I know what you mean though…why torture yourself over nothing. I think thyou time of year doesn’t help either…went to see Santa with the kids the other day and it was hard. Not sure how I’m going to get through Xmas without bawling my eyes out 🙄

No it was a radiographer, I guess? The consultant obviously saw it same-day and got in touch with my GP pretty quick too….all in 5 hours. And I can feel it, and see it now. It’s been getting bigger quite quickly and it’s now visible on my neck. And, suppose most upsetting, is that it’s on the side I hold my baby and it’s just too sore now. Thank you for replying…I just want to have it done and move on now!

Oh I so understand. I was having an operation ‘just in case’ ( it was BC in the end) in the February and my kids were 11 and 7 . That was 24 years ago.
It’s hard not to torture yourself but in time what I have learned and do my best to apply to myself is to not let it ruin the here and now. Very gently..worrying won’t change anything, Today you are well nothing has changed since yesterday ( except this scary news) and you have your beautiful kids to spend and enjoy xmas with. Try and take those thoughts,stick them in a drawer in your head and slam it shut, don’t give them the space to ruin Xmas or any day. There very probably won’t be any need to worry but you’ll have time to address that when you’ve seen the consultant.

The poster after me seemed to give very sensible information, it is easy to do a biopsy on the neck when you think about it, so really they as may as well do belt and braces and as the PP said it likely won’t be much, but if it is you will manage it step by step. Honest , Sending hugs

God, that must have been such a shock for you...really pleased to hear you're doing well now.

Thank you again for your advice, especially the "nothing has changed since yesterday". You're right, and I am well, physically. Either way, allowing this to impact on my family's Christmas would be regrettable...if it is cancer, I may look back on this and wish I'd done more while able to, and if it isn't, I'll kick myself for wasting time worrying over nothing.

I hope you have a lovely Christmas yourself, and many more to come❤

Can you take a photo of where it is exactly OP? Please. I might be able to help by looking.

That’s the way to do it 😊 Nothing has changed except that scary bit of news.
I was absolutely fine for 15 years then had another bump in the road 8 years ago all fine again until now and am in the waiting for results club again ( all BC related, thankfully I really trust my excellent hospital) So by experience I just try to apply the here and now thing. It’s easier at 59 than as a mum of young children though 😉
I am keeping everything crossed for you that it turns out to be nothing to worry about. Have a lovely Xmas and here’s to many more for both of us 😊

Just wanted to post an update; had some bad news today. It’s looking like lymphoma, although they still need to do further tests to stage it and figure out exactly what type. I think I’m still in shock, and really more than anything I just want an action plan/ to get on with fixing it. But, equally, the idea of treatment is pretty scary too.

Again, @Nonamelass , I’ve found myself clinging to what you said before, about not getting too far ahead, and that nothings’s technically changed. So thanks again for that. Not even sure anyone’s looking at this thread anymore, it’s been a minute! But, anyway, that’s that.

If anyone stumbles across this because they’re worried about something similar (I know I scoured the forums myself for the same reason), although the outcome in my case hasn’t been the greatest, what I’d say is that investigating concerns you have is always the right thing to do. Control - be it over your health, life, things that happen to you - is largely an illusion anyway, and often all you can do is the next right thing (excuse the Frozen quote - I have a 3yo 😅). Wishing anyone reading this the peace and strength to face into whatever life brings. ☮️💪🏻

Just saw this thread and wanted to say sorry it was bad news but best of luck. Once you have a treatment plan in place it’s easier to deal with as you can focus on getting through that bit by bit. I had a diagnosis of a particularly rare and aggressive BC totally out of the blue seven years ago. The “don’t Google you don’t want to know” type. I had a year of treatment which went really well and now it feels like a distant memory.

Thank you @Flatandhappy , I really appreciate that. Really glad to hear you’re doing well, but what a shock that must have been for you at the time, though. You’re a trooper for getting through it. Wishing you lots of healthy and happy years to come 💫

Sorry that you’ve had bad news. Wishing you all the best with your treatment.

Wishing you all the best and thank you for sharing your experience for others x

Wishing you all the best with your treatment and the outcome and pray that you all keep strong during this time with all the support you may need.

@Awhiya Hi!! Oh I’m sorry both that I missed your post but especially that it’s looking like lymphoma. Bugger!! This is an awful time when you’re waiting for more tests, results and then finally the strange relief of getting a treatment plan and getting on with that . IF it is actually lymphoma once your treatment starts you’ll feel more in control. And don’t be scared of treatments , I’m not going to lie and say it’s lovely but it’s doable and you will absolutely get through it. If you’ ve been reading forums you’ll know that a. the treatments for the big C in general have come on in leaps and bounds and b most people posting are the ones going through cancer atm. There are literally 1000s and 1000s that have had it and for who it’s just a distant memory or a manageable illness and aren’t on forums anymore . You were probably standing next to a few last time you were last in the supermarket 😊
Come and join us on the going through treatment thread on here if you fancy ( cancer support 97). We’re a nice chatty bunch. I’m waiting for my treatment plan atm too. Finished the scans yippee. Just want to get on with it now.
Sending you a big warm handhold and remember nothing’s changed 😉xxx

Breast lump here urgent referral ,,so feel your anxiety also young daughters and sons . Hugs op x

Thank you so much for your reply, it’s so encouraging. I think I might take you up on that thread. Somehow talking about it seems to keep it more rational in my head.

I’m sorry to hear your facing treatment yet again, but I’m glad you’ve got a good relationship with your hospital team and feel in safe hands. That must be such a key, important part of it. I’m looking forward to meeting the specialist on Monday, in that respect.

Thanks again for taking the time to speak to me here. No doubt I’ll see you on the other thread too. Wishing you all the very best in your treatment plan X

Aw I’m sorry. I was there ( mine wasn’t actually urgent, it was only supposed to be a fibroadenoma but was BC when it was taken out 8 months later’just in case’) I had young kids too. Still here to tell the tale 24 years later. Sending a warm handhold x

Och it’s so hard isn’t it? Im really sorry you’re going through it. Sending you vibes of strength and calmness (while trying to make them work on myself 🤣) One thing I’ve found helpful is, when I find myself spiralling into despair a bit, I try and remember all the things I have that some people never got the chance to. It seems to calm me down a bit, enough to be able to look after the girls, or cook dinner, or read a chapter of a book. Just trying to string as many calm moments together as possible, hour to hour rather than day by day.

Please let me know how you get on, sending hugs 🤗 no matter what it is, you’re strong enough x

So sorry to read your update. As others have said, please join the cancer threads… brilliant supportive folk who get it. As many have said, the not knowing is really the worst bit. 🌺🌺

Thankyou ! Good luck for Monday, Hopefully you’ll feel a bit more settled after the appointment xx

Ps for anonymous chatting through thoughts and stuff there’s the Macmillan nurses you can phone too I’ve found them very good xx

Hi Awhiya, I've only just seen your post. I hope the consultant was able to give you further clarity and a maybe even a treatment plan today. The waiting is the worst.

I have DLBCL. There are lots of types of lymphoma and they all have different treatments and chemo regimes, but if anything in my experience can help you, then just ask. Feel free to DM me. I've finished my initial chemo and am currently waiting for my PET scan results (Friday) to find out if it worked.

How are you doing? Sending best wishes xx