(cross posted from infertility)
F41 here, one DC - conceived naturally and pretty easily (maybe 3 months of actively trying - but that was nearly 6 years ago!)
Haven't yet tried to conceive again naturally (birth trauma, poor mental health & marriage uncertainty) but just as we were considering it BOOM cancer.
Breast. Primary + Local recurrence. 3 tumours and 4 ops to date.
Will be put into medical menopause for 5 years when active treatment ends. Given my age that means I have one chance to try something. It is not safe cancer wise for me to get pregnant naturally now.
I am considering egg harvesting and genetically screened embryo freezing (would need 2 years of hormones minimum before trying implanting) but my egg reserves and hormone levels are normal for my age (ie shit - 4 follicles on scan). Probably only time cancer wise for 1 round.
I have had four surgeries on various tumours in pretty rapid succession, lots of tests etc with bad news and lots (radiotheraphy, hormonal injections) still to go. And screening will be constant.
I am not ready to give up on being a mum again but I don't know if - physically or mentally - I can handle more appointments, more procedures and more waiting for results.
In the mix my DC wants a sibling but also wants me to be better and to never have to go to hospital again - and it's about to be the summer holidays.
The likelihood of conceiving is low but it is still a possibility.
And it's complex with my partner so if we split even if we were successful I couldn't 'use' the embryos but has to be embryos not eggs given my age - and using donor sperm would be calling time on my relationship.
What would you do? Put yourself through it to have tried everything or not risk the heartache given everything my poor body and mind has been through already? Give my child a chance at a sibling or give them a chance for a mum who is around, calm and normal for a bit?
Basically: what would you do given these odds? Thank you.