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Cancer

Find advice & support if you or someone you know has been diagnosed with cancer

A f*king unreal year so far.. trauma dump

2 replies

KittyKatG · 17/06/2025 22:19

Hi everyone. Just come for a rant and some advice perhaps? I don't even know..! I feel totally alone in my worries.

I gave birth last October to my first baby boy. Traumatic forceps+episiotomy birth because of sepsis during labour.. (waters had been broken for 36+ hrs)

So.. after a shitshow of a birth.. and YES, before anyone jumps the gun, I am beyond thankful me and my baby are here and now well, I am never EVER ungrateful for that!!!!!!

Had PPD. That was shit and not nice. Really though, its horrid and such a taboo subject matter that gets much judgement. Im currently taking 200mg sertraline because of most recent events

So.. fast forward from my sons birth to New years eve 2024... had the phonecall my dad has been diagnosed with liver cancer. That was a new years eve I will never ever forget

Almost exactly a week or so later.. I was getting phonecalls from my mums doctor.. they're having to try track her down.
I managed to get through to her and she told me she's been diagnosed with Lymphoma

I couldn't fucking believe it..

I'm not the closest with my mum as I had a pretty traumatic childhood with her telling me she wanted to kill herself daily when I was around 8 months old.. I know she had ppd and some MH issues that were addressed later on in her life.. but still, I do have resentment in me for what an awful childhood I had

Dad was my rock.. my closest family member after my lovely sister passed away in 2021 of a blood clot

My dad passed away April 28th.. it was a shock. He was waiting for chemo, he had some other complications.. and also a big blood clot that caused it.. but I had that hope he could get better?

2 weeks or so, prior to dads death, my husband told me that his most recent blood test he had in January this year (he's been on the watch list for routine bloods and scans as an outpatient for colorectal cancer.. January 2021 he had surgery to remove endocrine tumour and appendix)

January this year has flagged up as having high tumour markers for him..

the colorectal nurses rang him in April about Januarys blood test but gave him the excuse as to why its taken them 4 months to get back to him about his results is that the nurse that was dealing with his case has left so switch over of information takes time...

..Which is red flag number one

He was scheduled to have a new blood test to determine high tumour markers.. he rang to check results and colorectal nurse said "oh they're fine! Nothing to worry about, we actually got the results mixed up in the lab"

To which me and my husband were chuffed to bits about. He was scheduled to have a meeting at Aintree about his results but he requested if it could be telephone which receptionist said was fine and that she will pass that information over to consultant..

this phonecall did not happen when he waited for it

Fast forward around 4 weeks later..
We had a letter through from Aintree saying he hadn't attended his appointment and that his most recent imaging shows signs of reoccurrence and his fasting blood markers being high..

Today he has had that phone consultation with consultant at Aintree and had to drive there today to get a Full broad spectrum blood test.. which takes 6 to 8 weeks for results.. CT scan we're waiting for the letter

Consultant said they will have a chat/face to face once they have blood results and scan..

Really don't think my anxiety can wait that long to find out!!!!!!! I am so angry that we're only finding this all out.. now!!!! We should have had this blood test WEEKS AGO!

This year has been absolute living HELL for us

OP posts:
YesThatsATurdOnTheRug · 17/06/2025 22:36

I am so sorry OP. There is nothing I could say apart from that's absolutely shit, I'm so sorry you're going through all this and the world is really fucking unfair.

ZImono · 17/06/2025 22:43

This all sounds horrific, like truly awful 💐💐💐

I know you are on mat leave but if you have the funds it is worth checking the price and timing for bloods being done privately.

My understanding for cancer is that the only thing private does is speed up diagnosis (which is still very beneficial).

Separately I would phone every day literally and ask to check if blood ls have come back and also try and get the nhs app booked in advance.

Separately id be pretty cross with my husband for being so laissez fairer about the whole thing.
Hopefully this is NOtlT more bad news but going forward he needs to be way more front footed about his health.

Separately both of you if you dont already should get life insurance in place.

He in particular should do it NOW ahead of any diagnosis (without lying about anything either obviously)

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