So it's just DH and me now...

[rickyrickygrimes]

Anyone else a camping-empty-nester?

We've had years of camping with our two DSs but now, at 17 and 14, they are off doing their own thing. We've had one weekend away just the two of us and were amazed at how easy everything is when there are just two of you! No arguing, no complaining, just doing what we want, when we want. And loads of space! But we have a week ahead of us now, and I'm slightly more trepidatious.

DH is pretty active and wants to go walking / cycling. To date, he's gone with the boys - but now he wants me to go. I don't mind a walk here and there, but I'm nothing like as fit as them. I quite liked being left back at 'base' to tidy up, have a comfy seat and read my book.

Also DH has been eating incredibly healthily of late, which is great for him and we've always eaten pretty well. But in the past we've always compromised when camping to make things easy and kind of gone for the usual 'treats' like bacon rolls for breakfast (DH doesn't eat breakfast), hot chocolate at bedtime / supper (DH doesn't eat past 8pm), a glass of wine or two with dinner (DH isn't drinking atm). It seems a bit pointless to insist on a fry up when it's just for me 🙄. And he's happy eating the same thing every day at the same time - usually a big salad, twice a day. At home we don't eat together very often, due to work, school etc. so we tend to do our own thing a lot especially at lunchtime.

Anyway, it'll be fine, just a new chapter in camping life.

We used to camp a lot with DS when he was younger and we had some amazing times. Then we got divorced and DS outgrew family holidays so I didn’t go for quite a long time.

Then a couple of years ago I realised how much I missed it. Being outdoors, not really having any chores to do and just sitting watching the world go by. My friends are mostly horrified by the idea of camping so I started going solo. I’ve had some lovely trips on my own, doing whatever I like without having to consider anyone else.

Don’t let your DH spoil your trip, find walks that are suitable for you both, or find a little cafe somewhere where he can go off for a walk and you can enjoy a coffee in peace. And eat the foods you like, make yourself that bacon roll, enjoy a glass or red with dinner and a hot chocolate before bed. If your DH doesn’t want to join you then he’s missing out on the best parts of camping.

It is a new chapter in camping life but it needs to be one where you both enjoy it, not where your needs are ignored. Good luck.

Is there a halfway house, where you might do a couple of walks/part of a walk and then go back to camp on the bus/sit it out in a café. Narrowboat ride for you and walk for him and meeting up for the way back type thing? And maybe hire an electric bike one day to accompany him on a bike ride? But then you still getting precious time to sit quietly and read (also a big part of any holiday to me).

For the food - it's not pointless to do the stuff you want for yourself! If you were on a solo trip, you'd do it for yourself, so go ahead and have those things.

LOL, I have done ‘get loads of posh stuff because now I don’t have to fit kids in the car’ and then ‘no kids, downsize to be minimal and light in our feet’

Food: our egg and bacon fry ups are now scrambled eggs in the frying pan with chopped smoked salmon scraps.

You could roast mixed Mediterranean veg in foil over the fire, or get a BBQ wok if he wants lots of veg BBQ stuff. Cook steak!

And have wine… he doesn’t have to drink it. Have a lovely bar of quality chocolate to have chunks of.

Don’t know what to suggest about walks and cycling. Give it a go? Pick routes to scenic spots where you can take a breather and enjoy the view.

I camp solo a lot.

I love it, I eat good food and have nice wine and do lovely things. It isn’t pointless to do things just for you if he happens not to want a hot chocolate and you do. Good! Fewer mugs to wash,

I'd try not to get into the thinking that "it's not worth it just for me". Prioritise yourself - you are totally worth it!

I'm a camping empty-nester. After the kids left home, my wife and I hiked a lot but didn't camp. Since her death in 2020, I hike every year in the mountains trains (alps/pyrenees); multi-day hikes, camping or staying in mountain refuges. I love it, reaching places you could never get to doing day-hikes. But it is lonely if you're by yourself and requires a kind of resilience in you to keep going and not just head for the nearest town with comforts and human company.

I'd encourage you to try getting a little bit away from civilisation (it sounds like you partner could carry most of the gear) and see if you like it. Take it slow, your fitness will come

Why not ditch the camping when it' s just the two of u and make different memories?

Well we went and it was great! DH was happy to relax his eating standards, and just had a NA beer while I had the real thing. Walks were short and tbh I’d like to get fitter anyway. And we enjoyed each others company, while doing our own thing as well.

@Emptyandsad I’m sorry to hear about your wife. DH does do much bigger / longer hikes to refuges etc (we live in France not far from the Alpes) but that’s way beyond my fitness / tolerance level atm. He usually goes with our younger son, who loves it and they usually take camping gear. But he’s gone himself and usually enjoys meeting other walkers in the refuges.

OP - excellent! So glad you had a good time and it all worked out.

@Emptyandsad So sorry to hear about the loss of your wife.

I am glad you find something that strengthens you in our wild and wonderful mountains (for me, the Lake District) and I hope one day, when you are ready, you will find a kindred spirit along the way whose resilience and imagination matches your own.

We've done a couple of trips without the teens, we bought a smaller tent and found some lovely adult only spots tucked away in woodland. It's so much more relaxing but I do tend to start drinking at lunchtime.