Camping rule: #990

[kitbit]

Rule 990: don't eat noodles in a windy field

Rules number 1 to 989.... over to you!

Kitbit-in-windy-field-wearing-fetching-new-noodle-hairdo

#chill the beer before you put it in the cool box.

(very important this one)

#263 check the teapot for earwigs

#69 - have quiet sex. Nobody wants to hear all those squeals

#430 don't forget your headtorch

#231 never assume it won't rain

#123 If you put a light on in your tent at night everyone can see you shadow and exactly what you are doing ;)

#468 - Don't forget to put shoes on when venturing to the toilet block in the middle of the night, unless you like crusty rabbit shit getting stuck between your toes.

#25 - wear flip flops in the showers

#363 when sitting under trees don't just flip your hood up, check it first for livestock that may have abseiled in from the branches above

#354 Dont let your child give the farmers horse lucozade to drink - the farmer will chase them with a stick

Try not think your children are playing nicely in a field and have an extra glass of wine. They may just be stuck up a very high tree & need rescuing!

Don't drink the wine before you've put the tent up!

Mamaduckbone, you are absolutely right... When camping at a wedding with our one year old, DH was responsible for erecting our weeny tent. He decided to have a few beers with his best mate first.
He claimed there were no pegs in the tent bag, and so we had to go round the field borrowing the odd peg from lots of different people to hold our tent up.
When striking it the next day, I found the peg bag, UNDERNEATH the sodding TENT!

Don't leave your tent in a mess. When you leave your car keys in the car door and go off for a walk, the lovely dutch boys will put them in your tent with a note and will see what a slattern you are.

never 4get the "spare" 2 man tent to stick all the things u trip over into...... the other half included!!!!!!

Remember that people in every tent within 20 feet can hear every word you are saying when you are shouting at gently reprimanding your children.