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Bullying

Find advice from others who have experienced school or workplace bullying on our Bulllying forum.

Child with serious anger issues returning to school

9 replies

StormGazing · 17/06/2026 14:22

Hi
bit if advice info could. My child is in senior school, 2 years ago there were a series of incidents with a boy who was being a bully and being inappropriate with girls in my boys friend group. It was a really bizarre series of events that gradually got worse, and it all blew up one day and the boy went crazy (according to my boy). I received a call from school asking me to come in and collect my child, I got to the school and he was being surrounded by teachers, they were clearly in a panic, and I was told to get my child into our car, lock the doors and drive away without stopping. I said what do you mean what’s happened, I was told this boy was on a rampage loooking for my child and they didn’t know id the child had a weapon, but he was missing (teacher told me this), so we left. My child and his best friend, a girl, had both been affected, my son was frightened this boy lived near us and he’d get him in our home, break in at night etc. he was terrified. His best friend was terrrified too, her mum told us, and there other friend, also a girl, had been bullied and manhandled by him. After the incident This boy has been away for 2 years but apparently he’s coming back to school. We live in a city with LOADS of senior schools, plus other schooling provisions. The school rang to tell me today, the kids already knew apparently, and the call was very much a FYI call rather than a discussion. I made it very clear than I’ll be sending my child into school where I would no longer feel he’s safe, it was clear this child wanted to damage my child, and he’s apparently been seen by a child psychologist, but they seem to feel he should come back to this school. I told them it is likely going to trigger the boy himself, and/or the children he’s bullied / threatened violence and even been violent with, and inappropriate with girls (don’t know the details). Has anyone had any experience of anything like this? They’ve put him in a different half, made sure timetables don’t clash, and he’s apparently having a TA with him at all times, but I know that will not potentially stop a speedy kid with an anger issue wanting to get away from a TA who in actuality won’t be allowed to put their hands on him even if they can catch him, and if he has a weapon then they would be putting themselves in danger.
my child is AuDHD too and is just settling into school after starting meds (he has a very difficult time staying in class, can’t sit exams due to stress etc, he’s got a great friendship group so taking him out of school isn’t really an option.
any advice would be most appreciated

OP posts:
Larrythecatforpm · 17/06/2026 14:39

I would be telling them if this child returns, your child won’t be coming back due to safeguarding concerns. Wtf are they playing at!

MrsTerryPratchett · 17/06/2026 14:52

We had a much less serious version of this. Child attacked the teacher and the class with a weapon, DD and her friend got the other teachers, he was disarmed. Two very brave boys kept him away from the other students in the meantime. This was after months leading up to it.

The school handled it horribly, sending an email telling them not to talk about it and to have empathy. I wrote back telling them I wouldn't gaslight my child into minimising violence and that I would be very vocal about their safety.

The child did come back with 1:1, I assume medicated. No further incidents and it's been a couple of years now.

But my child wasn't the primary victim and didn't feel particularly traumatised by it. I think I would have done everything in my power to prevent him coming back had she been.

Pulledbluecurtain · 17/06/2026 14:55

I'm so sorry for your son. I don't know much about this. Is it an option to move schools because there's no point going in nuclear of im leaving the school if that isn't a threat you can follow through on.

Realistically you cant ask much about the circumstances of this other child, they won't tell you. If you can link up with the other parents and complain together it will make it stronger. I would ask to see the risk assessment of how they will absolutely ensure the safety of your children given the seriousness of the threat against them and interrogate it like you have here. If the child passes my son in the corridor and physically attacks him, will the TA intervene physically? What will the protocol be? If you can't search bags how can you ensure there isnt a weapon etc. Dont let up.

StormGazing · 17/06/2026 15:19

Thank you all. My son is ND and accessing school has been really difficult, now he’s medicated he’s settling in well, his friendship group are so important to him so I couldn’t move him and don’t think it’s up to the victims to move
Ive sent texts to the other mums so think I’ll suggest we’ll make a group complaint / see school together as the school usually likes to divide and conquer

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Tinywhitebutterfly · 17/06/2026 15:29

It seems crazy to me that the problematic boy is going back to the same school, where he has a terrible reputation, rather than having a fresh start.

Your best bet is to focus on the school's duty of care to your son and the other children - if you demand that he's removed, the school will ignore you, if you made it clear to them that every safeguarding breach will be followed up with governors, police etc, it might focus their minds.

StormGazing · 17/06/2026 21:01

Thanks @Tinywhitebutterfly

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StormGazing · 20/06/2026 21:27

Got half our meeting on Monday … told
them it needs to be longer. Happy to hear what you’d ask as a parent like me! I’ve got a list but can add other thoughts -
thanks

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Mostlywilliow · 20/06/2026 21:29

Who was it that told you to get in the car and drive off?

StormGazing · 21/06/2026 07:34

Mostlywilliow · 20/06/2026 21:29

Who was it that told you to get in the car and drive off?

The teachers

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