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Bullying

Find advice from others who have experienced school or workplace bullying on our Bulllying forum.

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Original poster

12yo Son Being Harrassed

29 replies

ThisCyanSheep · 08/01/2025 07:33

My son is being blamed for something he didnt do, but a group of boys is saying that they saw him do it. The school has taken their side because apparently it's just a popularity contest. According to bullying.gov, popularity can be considered a tool used by bullies.

My problem is that my son has a friend in that class who said he saw the other kid do it, but of course, he wasnt interviewed as part of the investigation. Later I find out it's because his mom didnt want him involved. This hurts me deeply because i thought that they were friends, and my son could really use a friend right now. Also, what ever happened to "see something say something?"

Moms, would you ever encourage your kid to not get involved in sticking up for a friend? Can someone be honest with me, like, I'm so confused and the school only cares about forgetting this.

OP posts:

Playdoughcaterpillar · 08/01/2025 08:18

I would absolutely encourage my son to tell the truth if a friend was being wrongly punished. In fact I wouldn't need to, as he has been brought up with Christian values and would do this anyway. All it takes for evil to flourish is for good people to do nothing. I hope things improve OP.

Original poster

ThisCyanSheep · 08/01/2025 08:21

@Playdoughcaterpillar I appreciate that so much. I also hope things improve.

OP posts:

NestaArcheron · 10/01/2025 16:25

ThisCyanSheep · 08/01/2025 08:06

@NestaArcheron believe me, I get that. I do. I hope your kids never need support from their friends.

I would never expect another child to put themselves in harms way for mine.
I'm not saying it's fair, but that's the truth - I as a parent wouldn't want them to do the right thing if it meant they would suffer. Nothing is more important than the wellbeing of my children, and if that makes me a horrible person I'm more than willing to accept that.
For what it's worth, I do actually feel for you in the position you're in and I don't think your son has done anything wrong. I just can see the other side as that would be my reaction too.

FrippEnos · 10/01/2025 19:08

ThisCyanSheep · 08/01/2025 08:14

@FrippEnos the teacher explained that it was friday, end of the day, so students were basically doing whatever they want. The assistant principal told me that one boy threw the glue stick and then my son smeared it on his own laptop. That is what I have to believe or risk being called snarky and disrespectful.

TBF it is a plausible scenario.
But you are right to question it.
It may be worth asking about cctv, although they probably won't let you see it.

And although its not a pleasant way to think your DS has also learnt that even those that you consider your friends often cannot be trusted to back you up. True friends are rare

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