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Original poster

Is This Right?

9 replies

EsaTinsley · 27/09/2024 18:13

Hey guys this is my first time using this website but I really need some outsider support. I’ve been going through a lot of stuff at my house with my family and have been getting little support for it. But I just want to share a little story and ask is this right. So I was dating my boyfriend for only a few days and then while we were dating his mom found out chats and started yelling at me even though it wasn’t me who was saying all this freaky stuff. She ended up saying some really racist stuff toward me and broken up her son with me. While this was happening I was with my guy best friend and he was helping me through this because I really liked my boyfriend. Then my best friend started flirting with me even though he has a girlfriend. He said he was going to go play fortnight and I told him I would go and watch him. While he was playing he started to pretend fight me and next thing I knew he put his hand on my thigh. I didn’t know what to do and then I put my hand over his. After a while he looked at me and kissed me , he wanted to make out but then said that it was too risky. Then after he started fingering me and touching me and I let him. He ended up kissing me again and I jerked him off. After a while I had to go home and I went over to him and kissed him with my sister watching me. We told her not to snitch bc he had a girlfriend, even though he said he wanted to break up with her. The next day I told my girl best friend and she was happy for me. But then I talked to my other friend and confessed that I felt bad. And then she went and told everyone. And now this guy who kissed me and now denying everything and saying it never happen, even though there is text message proof of us meeting again. Now people are coming after me telling me to stop spreading lies and threatening me. And I don’t know what to do? And did he use me? P.s he never broke up with his girlfriend and sent another girl a dick pic. Is this right?

OP posts:
Mrsttcno1 · 27/09/2024 18:55

How old are you OP? This all sounds very 16 year old drama.

Original poster
EsaTinsley · 27/09/2024 20:01

Mrsttcno1 · 27/09/2024 18:55

How old are you OP? This all sounds very 16 year old drama.

I guess it doesn’t really matter.

OP posts:
Mrsttcno1 · 27/09/2024 20:02

It does in as much as it sounds like everyone involved is acting like children playing silly games

Original poster
EsaTinsley · 27/09/2024 21:00

Mrsttcno1 · 27/09/2024 20:02

It does in as much as it sounds like everyone involved is acting like children playing silly games

Yeah well I am a teen older than 15 tho but I really just want to know what to do

OP posts:
Blusterydaytodaypoohbear · 27/09/2024 21:08

Keep away from both of the boys. They are no good.. And practice saying no. Having sexual contact with random lads will get you a bad reputation and it won't be for telling lies...

Mrsttcno1 · 27/09/2024 21:16

Blusterydaytodaypoohbear · 27/09/2024 21:08

Keep away from both of the boys. They are no good.. And practice saying no. Having sexual contact with random lads will get you a bad reputation and it won't be for telling lies...

Yep exactly this. Engaging in sexual activities with a boy who has a girlfriend, kissing him infront of your sister telling her not to “snitch”, then gossiping about it with multiple friends… you’re not mature enough to be engaging in this kind of behaviour so please stop.

As this poster says, you’re going to have reputation for much worse than lying.

Original poster
EsaTinsley · 27/09/2024 21:30

Mrsttcno1 · 27/09/2024 21:16

Yep exactly this. Engaging in sexual activities with a boy who has a girlfriend, kissing him infront of your sister telling her not to “snitch”, then gossiping about it with multiple friends… you’re not mature enough to be engaging in this kind of behaviour so please stop.

As this poster says, you’re going to have reputation for much worse than lying.

Show quote history

I really appreciate this. I do need to practice saying no bc I do let people take advantage of me quite often. I typically try to stay away from things like this, but sometimes I feel forced into with other boyfriends who threaten to kill themselves if I don’t do what they want, so I guess I just kinda asume that is what all guys want and I don’t want to upset them. Just for them to love me.

OP posts:
Mrsttcno1 · 28/09/2024 12:43

EsaTinsley · 27/09/2024 21:30

I really appreciate this. I do need to practice saying no bc I do let people take advantage of me quite often. I typically try to stay away from things like this, but sometimes I feel forced into with other boyfriends who threaten to kill themselves if I don’t do what they want, so I guess I just kinda asume that is what all guys want and I don’t want to upset them. Just for them to love me.

Show quote history

I’ll give you the same advice I would (and did) give my little sister when she was going through discovering boys & sex- boyfriends and sex are fun, but they can be awful, they should only ever add to your life, never become your whole life. Don’t worry about what boys want, don’t worry about upsetting them by saying “no” and don’t compromise your own boundaries and needs for their “love”. The right relationship with the right boy will make you happy, it won’t be full of drama, you won’t have to compromise on your boundaries or do things you don’t want to do in order to feel loved. True love is freely given, you don’t have to earn it by doing specific things, and you don’t have to hurt yourself to get it.

I don’t mean this to sound condescending but you really do seem just too young to be having sex or sexual contact with anybody, please take a step back. Don’t worry about finding a boy to love at your age. Focus on making yourself happy, spend time with friends, go for walks, listen to music, watch tv, build a beautiful life for yourself, and love yourself enough that you never accept anything less than the pure and kind love you really deserve. Partners should make your life better, not worse. Take care of yourself x

Original poster
EsaTinsley · 28/09/2024 12:46

Mrsttcno1 · 28/09/2024 12:43

I’ll give you the same advice I would (and did) give my little sister when she was going through discovering boys & sex- boyfriends and sex are fun, but they can be awful, they should only ever add to your life, never become your whole life. Don’t worry about what boys want, don’t worry about upsetting them by saying “no” and don’t compromise your own boundaries and needs for their “love”. The right relationship with the right boy will make you happy, it won’t be full of drama, you won’t have to compromise on your boundaries or do things you don’t want to do in order to feel loved. True love is freely given, you don’t have to earn it by doing specific things, and you don’t have to hurt yourself to get it.

I don’t mean this to sound condescending but you really do seem just too young to be having sex or sexual contact with anybody, please take a step back. Don’t worry about finding a boy to love at your age. Focus on making yourself happy, spend time with friends, go for walks, listen to music, watch tv, build a beautiful life for yourself, and love yourself enough that you never accept anything less than the pure and kind love you really deserve. Partners should make your life better, not worse. Take care of yourself x

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Oh my god. I really needed to hear this right now. Thaynk u for all ur support ❤️

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