8 year old son was assaulted by another boy in his year outside of school. what can I do?

[Moomoo2376]

Hi everyone,
Yesterday my son was kicked in the stomach and private area by a boy in his class at the playground after school. He was very hurt and sobbing. I questioned the boy and he admitted it saying it was self defence and his parents say that's ok. I watched the whole thing and in no way did my son make any move. He was just walking over to get a ball. This boy is well known after school and in school for being a bully, he's pushed over my 5 year old before and my 8 year old multiple times whilst playing football with other kids. Hes verbally horrible and tells him he's rubbish at football - this has been going on for a while and my son tries to keep away but loves football and playing with the other kids. However yesterday was the moment i'd had enough.
I went over to speak to his mum who was very patronising and accused my son of lying even though her son admitted it to her. She said "boys will be boys" and I told her how her son has consistently been horrid to mine and she needs to sort out his behaviour. it wasn't my intention for me and her to come to blows at all I hate confrontation but she clearly didn't want to acknowledge her sons bad behaviour.

I rung the school and explained what had happened and said that my son won't be in school until I've had a conversation with his teacher and head teacher about what the plan moving forward is. I will not allow my son to sit in a room for 5 hours with a child who has just assaulted him without some sort of safety procedure and acknowledgement in place.

I spoke to the head teacher this morning who seemed completely ambiviant, she said how it would be an unauthorised absence and that it happened outside school. I said i understood it happened outside school but this boys behaviour has been ongoing inside school as well and I've had enough and i want to talk to her about it so we can reach a resolution. She just said ok and that was it.

I feel very upset by the whole thing to be honest and i feel very anxious that the school arent taking it seriously. I want to understand what the rules are about outside school problems and if there's anything i should say when i do speak to her. I'm currently going through all the policies.

Can schools do anything when it happens outside of a school?

I don’t think the school can do anything about an incident that happened outside of their care tbh. Even if the school separated them during school time, it wouldn’t stop an altercation after school.

With the school, i would focus on anything happening at school time and specifically ask for a meeting about that, to see what can be done. Having dates of when things occurred and a list of incidences can help.

I would also contact citzens advice to see what they say. It may end up being a police matter.

School are unlikely to impose consequences for an incident that happened outside school and (from their view) was dealt with at the time.

Usually it needs to be more than one incident to be considered bullying - have you contacted the school about previous incidents? If not then now might be the time to start.

Is your child in the same class as the other child? It isn't clear from your post. If not, then they are already separated in lesson time. If so, then you could ask they are seated far away from each other.

It won't be a police matter due to the age of the assailant. However, the school absolutely CAN do things about stuff that happens outside of school - all the way up to exclusions. You need to ask exactly what the school will be doing to safeguard your child - make it clear that this is a safeguarding issue and make sure you do everything by email, with the designated safeguarding lead on cc. If you don't get a satisfactory answer from the head, then make it clear that you consider this a breach of their safeguarding duties and follow the complaints procedure.

This happened to DS but he was at secondary and the assailant was 11 so we got police involved straight away, informed school that police were involved, asked what they were going to do about it, and they immediately moved the assailant to another class, modified their timetable so that there was no chance of 'crossing' in the corridors, kept them in at break time and eventually expelled them after a couple more inidents.

Don't be fobbed off.

I get in touch with police community support officers because it happened outside school.
Happened to my Grandson.. they were brilliant.. came to ask him what happened.. then went to have a word with the other boy.. it stopped immediately.... don't know what was said but have scared the bully.

yes you can approach police as PP says - definitely worth it. Even if they just have a quick chat with the other child it will put a stop to future incidences.

I acknowledge the age of the child, but if they are regularly kicking other kids in the stomach, i think the police would want to know. Even if it’s to have a word with the parents.