Would this be classified as child abuse 🤔

[Sara1234576]

I have a problem with my next door neighbours verbally attacked my child. What's happened is my daughter who is 9, fell out with her kids coz her kids was hitting her and now mine does not want to be friends with her which I'm proud of as this is not the first time she has been hit by this child, this was before the school holidays. My child hasn't been mean to the other girl just moved on from her. Over the 6 weeks hoildays there was one time my daughter whent out to ride her bike to be called a bitch which she replied saying im not scared of u and carried on with what she was doing. Then suddenly the other girl mother stared being aggressive with my child telling her to move. Then nothing until the day before school starts, my daughter had her friends around in the pool to see next-door shouting saying they have throw something in her garden and to grow the fuck up however all 3 child was on the other side of my garden in the pool and they all said they haven't. A very short while later she came out again. Shouting that they have been bullying her daughter at school and she is going to get them in to trouble "which she has done". That same day the children was playing music while still in the pool the neighbours came out with her own music thing which was a lot louder then theirs and had this on for a while, while shouting very loud "coz the music was so loud" that she is going to get my kid in to trouble and she is going to speak with the head teacher about this bullying that my child has not done. What do I do? Can I ring social about this? If I ring social will they investigate her behaviour with her own kid? As If she can do that to my kids what she doing behide closed doors? Any help will be so appreciated

Can I ring social about this? If I ring social will they investigate her behaviour with her own kid? As If she can do that to my kids what she doing behide closed doors?

… no. Simply, no. You cannot call social services because of what might be happening BEHIND closed doors, when you don’t even have an indication that anything is. Then you would be going overboard in retaliating because you feel she upset your child… which is exactly what SHE did.

It just sounds like a huge overreaction on her part, and if anything, she’s probably one of those mums who is incredibly protective of their children and has a bio on Facebook or a sign in her house that reads something like, “When someone hurts my little ones, mY mAmA bEaR cOmEs OuT.”

I suppose if you’re truly, genuinely concerned that the child who called yours a bitch knows age-inappropriate language, or appears overly violent, perhaps you could discuss it with someone at the school so they can watch for additional warning signs (or leave it, if there aren’t any)?

Can you try having a conversation with her, and ask if you two can sort out any issues? Maybe it would help.

I'm wondering if I call social for help to shut her down and tell her to stop, if social decide to get involved then she will get even worse with my daughter and me, pluz I can see her getting physically towards me. Me and her was fine. This has come out of no where, apart from the fall out between kids. I'm not the one to thown shit at people and get her in trouble with social, me and my daughter have to live here. I believe the school will pick up on the fact that she screams and hits her child and does nothing but smoke weed in the home with her.

Im no expert but I’m not sure this is within social services remit. You could anonymously ring the school and say you have concerns for the child’s welfare if she genuinely is exposed to drugs in the home. I suspect though she may know it’s you and it could start more problems. Possibly your best bet is to communicate with her, explain where your daughter is coming from etc?

I don't want to be the one to call social on her for her kid. Someone else will do that in time. I wanted to get advice or maybe get them to have a chat with her about bullying my kid and to stop it. I will think about talking to her about why the kids fell out however I've already said about it when it first happened to make sure we was both fine with each other. Coz over the past 2 years they have fell out like 6 times. My stand on it is I will not slag off other child or encourage my daughter in any way. The only thing we have spoken about is her bondres and how proud I am for having strong ones. Which I've said all this to next door and she was like kids will be kids.

I can't see social services being interested in a squabble between neighbours and their kids. You could run it by the police if you feel your daughter is being threatened, but I don't know that they would get involved in this either. This is more a personal matter. Are you sure the playground hasn't become an extension of this dispute? It is possible your daughter and her friends are collectively being less than kind to your neighbour's kids at school. In that case, I'd encourage the parent to take it up with the school.

No, social services aren't going to tell her to stop gobbing off at your child.

Just ignore her. She's a knob and she won't change.

Report her to the landlord for antisocial behaviour every time she does something, if she's a social housing tenant, a private one won't care.

If she threatens you or physically attacks you, call the police and report the crime.

She can't "get your DD in trouble" when DD has done nothing wrong, so ignore all that bullshit, she's just trying to intimidate you and DD because she's never evolved beyond the playground age emotionally herself.

All it is, is now her DC isn't playing with the next door neighbor (your DD) she's having to do more parenting, entertain her own DC, have them hanging around the house more often, listen to them complaining about having no friends (probably because she's raised a little shit that goes around hitting everyone). And she CBA with any of it. So she's pissed off and taking it out on you/DD, who she sees as the cause of this situation for not tolerating her DC's crap behaviour.

Stop stressing about her and get on with your life as if she wasn't there.

They haven't been to school. It happened like a week or so before the school break which I spoke to the neighbours about the girls and she didn't say anything to me. I have asked my kid if she has done that to her and she said no. My kid said to me why would I make her friends stop playing with her. I wouldn't like it if all my friends stopped playing with me. I have two child and I know they lie to u and sometimes can be really mean. However I can't see her behaving in that manner. The way I've taught her friendship is if they are hurting u, u say goodbye and move urself.

Thank you everybody for your sound advice. I might leave it and stick camera up, just in case.

Unfortunately, social services won't be bothered. It's bad enough trying to get them to take action when a child is being physically abused, never mind anything else. Their standards are so low that this would not even register on their radar I'm afraid.

The camera is the best option. One for the front and back. If you can get one that records sound that will give you evidence if you need to get police involved.