DS4 bullied at party

[WolverineBlueyy]

DS4 started reception with no issues and knew half the class already from nursery. At nursery he would always come home talking about his friends.

Since starting school he has not mentioned any of the old friends. He began telling me most days he was spending his breaks alone, but didn't seem too bothered. This seemed odd, I raised it with teacher, she paid attention, buddied him up etc.

Today we went to a class party and I saw with my own eyes he was bullied by a group of old nursery friends throughout. Physically and verbally, completely unprovoked. He later confirmed they speak to him the same way in school ("I hate you, you're stupid"). He had never mentioned this before. There is no reason for this that I can see.

How to handle this, is it back to the school, or do I approach the parents without losing my shit? How do kids get back on track from this horrible treatment so young?

What a horrible experience. I’d start by contacting the school.

odeally I’d want any ringleaders identified and all participants educated out of bullying. If I felt the school wasn’t able to deal with it effectively plan b would be to move schools. They’re so new to reception that a change in school at this stage might be less bad than remaining in such a hostile environment - they’re likely to resettle well at this age.

I would absolutely contact the school about this and ask for a meeting about it. It’s sad that kids can be that horrible so young. Your poor son, I hope the parents are contacted and do something about this terrible behaviour! I’d be absolutely livid if I found out one of my children was a bully / being bullied.

I agree with above, obviously report and ensure the school is taking appropriate action, but maybe a move in school at this age would be more beneficial in the long run? From previous experience it can be a long road to sort this sort of toning out with the school not always being as hot on it as you'd want...

Thank you so much for replying. DS7 was part of a lovely cohort that is still very close so this is a new experience.

To see this in action - not just silly kids falling out, boys will be boys stuff, but something that just seemed instinctively wrong has been horrible. I actually saw two kids poke him while they were not even interacting - watching a magic show to say "I hate you".

(Oh I know we should have left but he wanted to stay)

So sorry, that is terrible. Agreeing with others who say report, see if it can be rapidly and successfully dealt with. If not, move schools.