Would you raise this with the school?

[Foundation]

DS is in Y4 at an independent school. He has told me that another child in his year constantly kicks him, hard, when adults are not looking. DS has reported this to adults at the school, who apparently tell the other child to desist, only for the behaviour to be repeated a few hours later, or the following day. DS says there is no point reporting it anymore because nothing ever happens to stop it.

As background, the child in question is a year younger than the rest of the class, and physically smaller. The child’s behaviour is clearly challenging for the staff to handle: extremely disruptive in lessons, deliberately sabotages sports matches, damages other children’s possessions and is rude to children and adults alike (I’ve witnessed all these behaviours myself in person or over Zoom so it’s not just DS making stuff up or exaggerating). DS says the child has been given various consequences (eg timeouts, detention, being sent to the head), but there seems to be no improvement.

I haven’t been happy that this child is disrupting DS and others’ learning but I didn’t want to say anything to the school because I trusted them to deal with it. But now over HT I’ve heard about the kicking. Physical violence seems to me a whole different can of worms and not something that any child should have to put up with.

What do any teachers here think: should I raise this with the school and if so, who should I raise it with? I can see that their teachers are doing their best, and I don’t want it to come over as complaining about them to the Head.

[coffeeisthebest]

Can you email his teacher initially and say this has happened repeatedly and doesn't seem to be stopping. If you don't get anywhere from that then email the head. Protecting your child and encouraging them to speak up against abuse is really important in my opinion.

[nearlyspringyay]

You raise it with the school in line with the safeguarding policy, there should be a safeguarding lead.

[GrazingSheep]

Yes I would.
Your child has a right to be safe in school.

[Happy36]

Yes, you must report it, please.

[Curioushorse]

You're PAYING for this education. They have a responsibility to you, as a customer, to deal with this. The fact that the school are coping badly with the child is not your problem. They can get rid of the problem child far more easily than a state school can- they're not subject to the same restrictions. Yes, you absolutely should complain.

[RosesAndHellebores]

Are there bruises? Yes you do need to report it. I'd just say something like "I understand there are challenges with x's behaviour and the school are being supportive. However, that behaviour is now involving physical contact, kicking, with my child. I appreciate there may not be an immediate magic wand vi's a vi's the behaviour overall but I expect my son to be able to attend school without being repeatedly kicked and I expect that to cease immediately.

Happy to discuss further.

[LadyMonicaBaddingham]

Definitely raise the concern BY EMAIL to the headteacher. Point out that your son has told you there is no point reporting it because nothing happens to stop it because this is no a good sign. Ask for a email reply by (time or date) to inform you of the action they intend to take to protect your child from repeated physical violence.

copies in case you need to escalate to the governors.

[NuffSaidSam]

Yes, of course you have to talk to the school. How could you not?!

I'd speak to his class teacher in the first instance. Ask for an appointment, don't try and do it at drop off/pick up.

I'd also think about how happy you are with this school, doesn't sound like a great way to spend a lot of money.