Confused with this mum . Childish gossipy behaviour .

[Piapiauno]

This new mum has a very nice daughter who is very sensitive and loves eavesdropping ( it’s not a dirty word here) lots things class teachers private talking to each other and reporting back to mum at home. ( not sure trained or untrained or just natural personality ) . Of course she will also report what has happened at school that day etc etc . Not sure of accuracy % whenever I heard from them I just try to be objective and always have a question mark at back of my head.
But a lead is a lead. As my DS is not a huge talker, getting any info out of his mouth is like getting water out of stone . So this family helps with connecting dots. Esply I am so busy with work and I don’t hang around like she does. I rush home. She hang round 30-60 mins on campus after pick up just to do socialising.

However this extreme clever little girl has extremely difficulty in social skills. She is very precious and her mother trusting her words completely.
For example, the mother always crying to the teachers on weekly bases for whatever the girl said at home ( other girls don’t talk to her or exclude her or pushed her ) she is like a “victim” from sep whole the way to now feb ,
While no other kids have any issues whatsoever. 1 NEW teacher Became very very friendly with the mum. ( sometimes even special treatment or at least seemingly some of Favouritism in the air ) . While other more experienced older teachers not very keen on her ( maybe seen her as the weekly moaner) .

Above is background information.
I don’t really care to be honest . It’s not my business.

Then one day my DS has some conflict with that new teacher. Which is rare for past few years with any other teachers . ( for legal reason I can’t say anything about it . And it’s also long story).
Anyway this new mum is trying her very best to influence me . She acts like she is blood sister of this new teacher. Go out of miles to try to influence me . The gist is :
My DD said this 12345. Therefor these are automatically truthful facts & very accurate (and I don’t care whatever ur DS Said ). I think ur DS needs shrink mindfulness books and you need to let DS repair with this teacher.

I ignored her politely. and moved DS to different place ( in same school same building ) .

She then firstly ignored me a few days then suddenly texted me fishing for info. To which my reply is “sorry I am tired up canot talk about it sorry for legal reason “.

Then this is when shit hit the fan.
Since then she suddenly became passive aggressive and yet so obviously ignore me and my DS. It’s the same building, we can’t avoid each other. so if she walking with a group of folks with kids. She will take a U TURN in front of me and those folks ,about 10 meters while her kids saying hello to my DS.
She literally just run away with her kids.
( probably will tell them not to play with my DS) .
Which I don’t care about her childish behaviour. And I am guessing she said something to other folks about me . As they became bit funny and they saw she running away quickly also obviously a few times whenever she sees me . Which is funny as I didn’t even try approach her. Just polite smile . Wave to a group of folks on the road 20 meters ahead . She will do a very dramatic leave turn around with back towards me if standing there or just run away with her kids in front of everyone .

As Said i am busy, hard working, not in any clique or groups . I come and go . And I am happy we are not in same class anymore . those behaviour don’t bother me outside school building that much .

BUT I feel sorry for my DS Have to witness all those behaviour. He has very light ASperger.
I try my best to be nicely sociable for his sake.
Now I just hope he is too slow to pick up all these. And won’t ask me : mummy why they run away whenever seeing me .

Now I feel like I have Asperger also. Because I don’t understand this behaviour.

For all the past few years in this same school, most mums are nice, mature, keeping a healthy boundary, trying not to gossip,(at least trying to keep a good gossip not a bad gossip ) and not many will hang around daily for 1 hour in campus just to chit chat with teachers/ folks alike her.
Maybe due to covid we could not do all above back then.
But my other mummy friends also come and go , no one hang around.

blimey I'm baffled - but the gist seems a bit childish to be honest

There is no such thing as 'light Asperger'.

So adults are using a little girl to find out what happens in school including you and now she has spoken about something your ds has done you are upset? And people are ignoring you? (Or not I couldn't follow that)
As for saying you cant talk about things for legal reasons of course it's going to fan the gossip flames!
Just try to focus on your own little boy I think

There is also a new mum B . This is different story. I am always nice to mum B, and helped her out with some accident on campus . and I was witness for her accident . Her husband thanked me.

I always kept a healthy friendly distance from mum B . As she always texting me with her issues quite self absorbed me me me …. It’s forever about her . and nothing I can do to help really.

She then try to make friends with mum A who already googled every folks full name & address in google back in September and made up her mind who she will invest time to make friends with.

Mum A daughter also told her daily story about mum B “s kid in trouble daily ( adhd tendency) who upset every kids and teachers on daily bases (getting slightly better now 2nd term . ) very disruptive.

Of Which mum B is clueless . As she is very busy.

Now yesterday … mum B suddenly told me abruptly: I love mum A so much . She is my best friend I am not Gona say anything & involved .

while I have 1000 texts in my phone from mum A “s DD describing all bad gossips of mum B “s DS . I will not say anything .

And wish them a beautiful long friendship .

I mean I heard everything from A & from B and from A bla bla bla about B .

But I am not saying anything and have not never said anything .

Now we as a family are punished for not agreeing with her daughter”s opinion of her fav teacher and not agreeing with her perception of real life event .

We chose to decide for ourselves and took action for ourselves and my mouth shut very tightly. We keep it to ourselves .
However this make them angry.

Which in the core is never their business .

@theqentity

There is no such thing as 'light Asperger'.

What terminology you call it ? During another 3 years waiting time before an official diagnose .

If you want to keep out of the cliques and playground drama adopt a 'cheery wave and hello' if you catch the eye of other parents but other than that keep yourself to yourself.

As others have said there's no such thing as light aspergers - your either autistic or not.

@Needcoffeecoffeecoffee

So adults are using a little girl to find out what happens in school including you and now she has spoken about something your ds has done you are upset? And people are ignoring you? (Or not I couldn't follow that) As for saying you cant talk about things for legal reasons of course it's going to fan the gossip flames! Just try to focus on your own little boy I think

Yes I am exhausted. I already done minimum at school gate . and yet this is my punishment .

I will now just say hello and bye to everyone. Nothing else absolutely. Not even private text message . ( we have a class what’s up group ) .

And for DS . I will try join lots clubs to be sociable in a whole ,
than this kind of 1-1 exhausting relationship .

@HMG107

If you want to keep out of the cliques and playground drama adopt a 'cheery wave and hello' if you catch the eye of other parents but other than that keep yourself to yourself.

As others have said there's no such thing as light aspergers - your either autistic or not.

U nailed it . Hello and bye . That’s it.

I am only a week new to ASD . It’s a very big spectrum. We are being told we are on a very light end and even boarderline but this will take 2-3 years to diagnose .

You sound about 12 years old.

“New mum A” has sent you thousands of texts about even newer mum B?

Really? Well delete them and either block or ignore.

@KweenCnut

You sound about 12 years old.

I think the OP may not have English as their first language.

@viques

“New mum A” has sent you thousands of texts about even newer mum B?

Really? Well delete them and either block or ignore.

Yes I blocked both already. and left the class what’s up group .

I cannae make head nor tail of it to be honest but like a PP said, it all seems frightfully juvenile and all so different from the home life of our own dear Queen

So a whole pile of unsubstantiated gossip has come from a small child who has been eavesdropping and you've actually bothered taking any notice of it?

I'd just ignore the whole lot and get on with your day. If the school has anything to communicate, they will do so in writing. Why are you wasting head space on this nonsense?

People with Asperger's fall somewhere on the Autism spectrum. Some are very severely affected, others have mild symptoms. Within the Asperger's group there are also those who exhibit very wide ranging symptoms and others who display very mild characteristics. This is no doubt what you were being told by your medical person

@turnaroundtime

People with Asperger's fall somewhere on the Autism spectrum. Some are very severely affected, others have mild symptoms. Within the Asperger's group there are also those who exhibit very wide ranging symptoms and others who display very mild characteristics. This is no doubt what you were being told by your medical person

I been told 3 days ago that a general doctor is suspecting . Then been told to go home and wait for referral letter from specialist team 3-6 months later . That’s all I have so far.