My dd was verbally bullied by another child last summer term. The verbal abuse was bad enough, but this child was also constantly making derogatory comments about my dd and encouraging other children to dislike and alienate her. I don't blame them - she sounds scary and it sounds like the adults in the school are scared of her too.
The school didn't deal with it particularly well (do they ever?) and I wanted to move dd's schools. She wanted to stay, then they got sent home due to covid, then summer holidays.
She was very low over the summer and I spent a lot of time helping her lift her mood to the extent that she was quite excited about going back to school.
Day 1, bullying starts again, I send off school transfer forms and email HoY. Long story short, lots of gaslighting about the bullying from the school.
Even worse, dd was singled out to be moved from her class and placed in a class where she only knows two children who are allies with the bully.
The reason for this is that she didn't receive her SATs results (not her fault) so doesn't show up on the school Progress 8 data, and children that they need to 'progress' are put in the higher sets.
Sounds unbelievable, but that's what's happened. Dd gave it a go for a few days but spending 3/4 of the timetable in a situation where she had no allies and was covering things that she learnt in primary school was awful for her.
She's refused to go to school this week. I've had a meeting with the school which I thought was about how to support a child who has been bullied back into school and learning. It turned into a victim-blaming exercise. They wouldn't even consider moving her class so that she at least has some friends and is learning something and are saying that she was 'supported' with the bullying (though neither she nor I recall that).
I mentioned in the meeting that I wanted her to move schools as she has been so badly treated, but she wants to stay and I will support her with that.
Received an email from the school this afternoon saying that they'd support a transfer.
Dd is devastated. She's been there for three years, has done absolutely nothing wrong, and just wants to be safe, have some friends, work hard and do well in her GCSEs.
Her two close friends are at the school in the same class (the one she was in for the last three years). She's become very withdrawn due to the bullying and doesn't have any other friends anymore really.
My heart is breaking for her.
I don't know how long it will take for the other school place to come through, so until then she's stuck at home being sent work like adding fractions. She's third on the waiting list, so it's how long is a piece of string.
Other than do what I can to make her feel good about herself and try to expediate the new school place (don't know if I can), how else can I support her?
She had a lovely couple of weekends with friends (the two at her current school) really believing that the school was going to support her. It was such a relief to see her happy.
How can I support her? I can't magic up friends for her, and she doesn't want to see her friends from her old/current school as it's too upsetting for her.