My DD (7 years old) has a small group of friends who, on the whole get on really well, however there is one girl in the group who has continued to be mean to DD for the last 2 years. The girl is bossy and controlling and seems to get obsessions with each of the girls at one point or another. When she is in one of these possessive moods, she cannot stand my DD talking, playing or even standing near her friends and physically puts herself between DD and the other children. She has told DD that she doesn’t want her playing with the other girls in the group and that she wishes she’d just go away and play with other people. The other girls in the group also get frustrated and fed up of this girl sometimes but when they try to play separately she will follow them and tell her big sister that they are being mean to her.
That’s another issue - the big sister “confronting” the other girls and warning them not to be mean to her sister. They are not being mean, the simply don’t want to be bossed around and controlled. Some of us mums have also had the girls mother confront us about our DD’s upsetting her child - she has acknowledged that her daughter gets very possessive of her friends and knows thats an issue, and it’s always transpired that them “being mean” is when they stand up for themselves against this girl and refuse to do what she wants. I spoke to the teacher last year and it seemed to settle down a bit but since they’ve gone back in September it’s happening again. I’ve told DD to ignore her, to play with some other children or to tell the teacher is anything upsetting happens.
There was another incident on Friday, and I have just had enough. I’ve told DD that she is not to play with that group of friends anymore. I’m not sure if this is the right thing to do, as in a way it’s giving this child exactly what she wants - to force my DD out of the group, but I cannot stand my DD dealing with this every couple of days and I don’t know how else to deal with it. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.