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Bullying

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Bullying policy

5 replies

tamzinro · 02/10/2018 09:36

So what is the bullying policy at your child's high school ?
At my child's it's getting tripped up , slapped , and verbally abused in the corridors since joining in September after much complaint there is no evidence so nothing can be done , so after my son retaliated 2 days ago he got punished along with the other boy because there is a zero -tolerance policy on fighting ... Not allowed to record on phone in school premises and my son has one friend so never anyone witnessing anything anything because the other boy is too afraid to say anything . I have spoke to the parents and they are in denial that this is going on .

what can be done about this ?
Because another incident happened yesterday so it hasn't stopped ?
The teachers say just tell us but then the boy denies it and then there's no evidence so one big circle

OP posts:
Cancook · 06/10/2018 10:07

I’m afraid parents quite often are in denial because they feel it’s a criticism on their parenting skills.
From now on keep notes of any incidents and have a good look through the policy to see if there’s anything they are not adhering to.
It’s such a shame that it’s happening to your child - hope things improve.

Heartshapedfairylights · 06/10/2018 10:10

Your poor son.

Look up the school bullying policy, quote it back to them and tell them your son does not feel safe at school so you will be contacting ofsted.

itsaboojum · 06/10/2018 17:32

Sadly, this fits the classic pattern of how schools 'manage' bullying.

You are in the first stage: denial. they will deny anything that cannot be proven.

If you later have one or more incidents which can be proven (by witnesses or physical evidence), you will move into the second stage where the school will play the whole thing down. Expect to hear phrases like "not a cause for concern", "a minor matter", and the classic "it's just an isolated incident".

If you can then go on to show sufficient "isolated incidents" are taking place, you will be treated to oh-so-sincere 'assurances' that they are aware of it and have it all under control........ you'll hear phrases like "......blah blah....robust policies.......blah blah...... measures put in place......blah blah-di blah blah".

Ultimately, they will find a way to turn the whole thing round and blame the victim for everything.

You have to be prepared to complain, and then to escalate the complaint through a whole string of defensive-minded vested interests: teacher, head, governors, academy trust/local authority, Ofsted (and be aware that Ofsted are reluctant to act over individual cases: they are only likely to be concerned if there are multiple cases.)

You are going to meet with denial at each stage unless you have facts, so log every single incident together with dates, times, places, witnesses, etc. Report every incident to school and keep a written record of their responses.

You will be seen at "the difficult parent" throughout, simply because schools cannot stop bullying. It is systemic to the whole institution of state schooling and, to a large degree, state schooling depends on it happening.

Cancook · 06/10/2018 22:06

itsaboojum Oh my! I can relate to this on so many levels. If you speak up you are definitely seen as a difficult parent. We met defensive walls at every stage and some outrageous behaviour to try and cover things up.
The sad thing is why can’t they stop it?

Cancook · 06/10/2018 22:10

... and I will also say that I’m pretty sure that they believe their own guff when it comes to making excuses for bullying.

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