Being Bullied/Harrased BY a Physically Disabled Child

[nicklello]

This is a bit of thorny issue to address; it turns out that my son (13, in year 8) is being bullied by the wheelchair-bound child in his year !

It's emotional and physical abuse that he is putting up with (silently until now).

Physically, the other child has BEEN SEEN BY THE SCHOOL purposely running her wheelchair into other students; my son unfortunately is reportedly her favourite target.

Nothing seems to get done as as soon as she is spotted/approached by staff she bursts into tears and gets the 'sympathy vote'.

This has been going on for years apparently and we are only just finding out about it.... it's destroyed most of my sons friendships in and out of school and shattered his confidence.

Any ideas / suggestions ?

How old is he? I’d be inclined to pull him out immediately. This is not appropriate behaviour. Bullying is not acceptable actually. Talk with the school pronto. This is serious.

If this girl has also been doing it to other students then surely they must be telling someone, too? Take pictures of any marks left behind from the wheelchair and show the school. Tell them to do something or you'll be getting police involved. Try and find out who the girl's parents are as well.

Honestly I'll probably get a lot of backlash for this next part: Tell your son to give the girl a small kick in the shin next time she does it. The school will probably do something about it then. It's self defense; he's kicking her away to save himself from being injured by her again.

I wouldn't move unless it gets really out of hand as settling in a new secondary school is a lot harder than primary. Most primary school children will instantly want to befriend the new pupil but the majority of secondary pupils won't bother and friendship groups would have already been formed. It also sounds like this is your son's only problem and without the girl he'd be quite happy at this school.

Don’t tell him to kick her or it will be impossible for the school to resolve properly.

This needs to be dealt with like any other bullying. Tell your son to write an account of specific incidents he remembers and who was there at the time etc. You say the school saw it - get your son to write down the member of staff who saw this happen.

Bursting into tears is a tactic used by quite a lot of bullies to manipulate and twist things around - if they are aware of this tactic then it shouldn’t make any difference.

It’s really not a thorny issue. Disabled people are just as able to be badly behaved as anyone else.

All bullying needs to be addressed. The school clearly know something is going on.

He needs to report her every single time (also record every incident). You need to speak to the school to say this needs addressing pronto. They will probably be worried about being accused of discrimination, but that’s no excuse to turn a blind eye to bullying.