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Bullying

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17DD and her passive bully

3 replies

MeganJames · 15/02/2018 21:03

My daughter goes to an all girls school and rumours spread like wildfire throughout the school.
My daughter, she’s not shy but she also isn’t popular, has been close to some girls for about 4/5 years now (they only met then)
Last year a new girl , a popular girl , joined their class and their friend group.
The popular girl has been causing trouble for the last year or two in their group. She makes a point of excluding different people on a day to day basis, saying “little comments” (the other day the popular girl was changing in the class and a different girl (who my daughter says is very insecure) said”I wish I was confident enough with my body to change in front of other people” and the popular girl replied “I know right isn’t it great” and looked the poor insecure girl from head to toe)
My daughter has said enough is enough and she can’t take it anymore however she has never been very confrontational, and she is (along with another one of her friends) scared of what this girl will do if they confront her (tell her they don’t like it or even that they want to end the friendship)

My daughter is terrified of the power this girl has: the majority of her grade would exclude my daughter from things or even verbally bully her if this girl spreads enough rumours. My DD is also scared of what might happen with her friends because they’re also scared

I don’t know how to help! Bullies have changed so much from what I knew them as when I was at school

My DD has 2 years left of school(writing from South Africa)

OP posts:
DailyMailDontStealMyThread · 15/02/2018 21:11

Things have very much changed haven’t they. Could your DD and friend ghost this girl?

MeganJames · 15/02/2018 21:33

If they do she’ll still cause trouble in their lives via rumours and exclusion.

OP posts:
DailyMailDontStealMyThread · 15/02/2018 21:44

It’s difficult but can your daughter get a feel for others who feel the same as her and her friend, the insecure girl for starters and gather friends by numbers to ghost her?

It must be doable, bullies only last by jealousy and power don’t they?

She would have to be careful not to divulge to anyone wanting to replace the bully or look good in her eyes but if there was enough of them to feel strong enough to stand up to her...

My mum would have told me to stand up and punch her in the face but I haven’t used that stance helping my own DD out Grin I also didn’t follow her advice as a teen as tempting as it was.

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