13yo Stepson's bullies targetting our home - how do we deal with it?

[2sCompany]

Have also posted this in 'Teenagers' as I didn't realise there was a 'Bullying' topic page...

Hope someone has some words of advice, we are really in a quandry.

My 13yo stepson is being bullied by a lad in his year at school (Y9). SS could start a fight in an empty room and I don't doubt that he had a hand in starting this feud which has been going on for some time. However, the bully has recently stepped it up a notch and has started coming round to our house throwing things like plastic bottles, snowballs, ringing the doorbell and running away.

We live in a relatively small village and the bully boy is part of a small gang who are a bad element in an otherwise lovely, safe place to live. DH caught up with them the other night when a snowball was thrown at the house and they were all shouting and swearing at him in the street. We have 3 other DCs 9, 2.5 and 3months, so I really don't want them to be affected by all this.

Bully boy cites his main reason for victimising SS is some "rumour" he heard about SS doing something sexual to his 2yo little sister. Which is disgusting and totally unfounded. He has punched SS and always chases him off the school bus and round the village whenever he sees him, so that SS hardly ever goes out of the house now.

DH and I don't know whether to confront the bully's mum about it or not. It is affecting the whole family now but equally, I don't want to get our whole family on the wrong side of the 'bully gang' and their families and all our children have to suffer the consequenses for the rest of their lives as it risks turning into a long term grudge.

Is it a police matter or are we overreacting? Should we get the school involved?

Really don't know what to do. Any help or advice gratefully appreciated.

I'd get the school and police involved tbh

ds shouldn't have to feel a prisoner in his own house

Thank you... Yes I think we will be in contact with the local police. If nothing else I hope they can at least give us some advice on the situation.

If you do not think the mum will be supportive I would involve the police and make the school aware.

Do you know the family? Do they seem like they might be reasonable? Might be worth talking to them in a 'what can we do about this situation?' kind of way.

Really feel for you, must feel horrible.

The police will do nothing without video evidence .

It's not the fault of the police, it's just without absolute evidence, the best they can offer is a bit of a talking to the bully and his parents - that does nowt with these people. Get to B&Q and buy a CCTV setup, recordable media.

I know of the family, but don't know them well. The boy's mum was in the year below me at school and has lived in the village all her life. I have lived here on and off for going on 25 years or so, so we are known to each other but have never mixed in the same social circle.

I don't know if she would be reasonable or not, I get the impression she lets him do what he wants. I would like to talk to her about it, but I don't know if this would make things worse... then again, going straight to the police could have the same effect. I don't want to make a petty teenage boy's bullying tactics into a long term hate campaign that could affect the whole family, in particular the little ones, in the future.

CCTV sounds like a good plan, I will look into it.

Thanks everyone