4 month old refusing milk in the day but not at night!

[explodingbosoms]

My lovely 20 week old dd has started to refuse feeds in the day. She normally feeds every 3 hours and has done since she was tiny. Has always been ebf and a great feeder.

Now for at least two feeds per day, normally the first two feeds, she feeds fine for about a minute then pulls away, arching her back and crying if I try to latch her back on. I've tried sitting her up for a minute to wind her, but these days she never has wind so I don't think it's that. I usually swap boobs but it's the same story on the other side. It's like she is determined not to eat! And I know that she is not getting down to the hindmilk. Meanwhile my boobs are massive and leaky.

I've always had a strong letdown but she has always been fine about that so I don't think that is putting her off.

The afternoon feeds are usually better and she feeds properly.

The intuitive thing to do would be to extend the time between feeds I guess. Sometimes she goes 4 hours in the day. But she is still feeding once in the night, and recently twice (so this morning it was 2am and 4.30am). So she still needs the milk, it seems- though she doesn't exactly guzzle it down at night and I wonder if it's just habit.

I suppose she must be getting enough and one half of me says to just go with it. The other half wants to sleep! It's like she's filling up in the early hours then not hungry in the morning. If only it could be the other way round!

Any thoughts?

She is now sucking furiously on a cloth toy having refused a feed at 11am...

(sorry for double post of original thread btw)

Hello, I'm having exactly the same problem with my 17 week old dd. I think there could be 2 reasons for it, firstly it could be teething which makes feeding more painful and does make some babies lose their appetite. But mainly, I think the problem is down to her nosiness, she is far too distracted during the day to want to feed and arches her back to look around. Its particularly bad if we're out and about,if theres even the slightest noise then she is just not interested. I have also noticed that she is not hungry in the mornings because she is filling up during the night. I have noticed a slight improvement since extending the times between feeds, she has always fed 2 hourly and I'd gotten into the habit of still offering every couple of hours. Now that I'm starting to look for hunger cues she is generally feeding every 3 hours and has a proper feed rather than just a few mins of messing about.

Another thing which has helped enormously is feeding her when she's drowsy so I generally feed her when she's just woken from a nap. Finally, feeding in a consistent place, with the curtains drawn which helps to minimse distractions. I find our bedroom is better for this as the walls are cream (boring!). I've heard from other mums that 4 months is quite a common time for this to happen as babies become a lot more inquisitive and distractable.

Good luck!

Thanks for the advice. I have noticed that if we're out and about, or even if somebody else is in the room, it's worse. Will try the things you suggest.

Thinking about it, extending the time between feeds could be a good idea. That way she will at least feed properly when she does and may not fill up at night.

Hi there explodingbosoms . I've had the exact same problem with my DS since he was about 4 months old. I ended up having to rock him to sleep first and then feed him. Nothing else would work he has gradually grown out of it and now at 6 months will feed to sleep for naps (so he starts off awake at least) in public and at home will feed if hungry in the bedroom as long as NO ONE else is about. He still wakes at least twice during the night for a feed.

It is all complicated by weaning, but that is a different story altogether .

Have a look at reverse cycling, it may help. In general I have found Kellymom an invaluable source of information. Good luck!