Dropping night feeds at 16 weeks, strange HV advice?

[VictoriaandBump]

Hi, I think I know what the answer to this will be but I'm looking for reassurance from other mums that this is normal. My daughter (first baby) is nearly 16 weeks and when I mentioned to the health visitor yesterday that she had started waking more frequently in the night to feed she told me that I shouldn't feed her.

To give a bit of background, by 10 weeks DD had dropped from 2 feeds to 1 feed around 3 or 4 am. However for the last few weeks she is now waking around 2 or 3 times a night, with occasional nights where she wakes every 2/3 hours. I breastfeed her each time she wakes and she goes back down without much fuss. The hv reckoned that because she has proved she can sleep through before, when she wakes now she is just wanting to feed for comfort. This might be the case sometimes as she will feed for a couple of mins and fall asleep straight away, but mostly she seems really hungry (my hubby gave her a 5oz bottle of ebm last weekend to give me a break and she drank it really quickly and still wanted more!).

I don't mind the night feeds and reckon when my dd is ready to drop them, she will. When I told the hv this she seemed to think that if I didn't nip it in the bud she would still be feeding in the night at 6 months and it would be hard to get her to sleep through. I think it is too early to start dropping feeds and am worried she would lose weight. Am now really confused, and it has made me question what I'm doing! Thanks for your help, much appreciated.

It's not too early to drop feeds. If she's gaining weight and meeting milestones etc then there's no need to accept an increase in broken night. I agree with you HV that if she's shown that shye can sleep for longer then that is to be encouraged. OTOH I don't agree with your HV's way of going about it.

Habit is one thing, but ifshe's genuinely hungry then she needsto be fed. Could you encourage her to feed more during the day? At this age babies get very interested and distractable, and she may not be getting enough calories during the day, hence her hunger at night.

Do you give her a dreamfeed when you go to bed?

Do you allow her AA evening feed-athon?

If you're certain she's not hungry and is waking by habit or for comfort, you could try sending your dh in to stroke her (not pick her up, cuddle or chat) until she resettles. This may not work if you do it, as you smell of milk to her.

I disagree- 16 weeks is classic sleep regression time and growth spurt time, plus the world is too exciting during the day and so babies don't feed as well then and so make up for it at night when it is quiet. Also major developmental leaps are going on then so baby is using up loads more energy (eg. my baby is rolling over all the time) and so need to feed more. So I think it is too early to drop night feeds (and when I asked local infant feeding co-ordinator who is the guru for all things related to breastfeeding she said it was too early to drop night feeds)

My DD is almost 20weeks and went through this a few weeks ago and has now got better and now goes 6hours (with a few 8hours) (she used to do max 5 for first part of night). I think you just have to ride it out. (having said that my DD decided to feed every 90minutes last night - yawn! but she has been so much better in last week or two- Cranial Osteopathy possibly helped.

I also disagree with hv. At 6 months when she is getting food then maybe - but not at 16 wks. HVs really do talk out of their bumsd sometimes (ime)

Another who disagrees.

She's still tiny, the accepted guidelines are that most babies do not need a nightfeed at 6 months, but even then they can have growth spurts and be genuinely hungry when they wake up.

It is really usual for babies to have a period of sleeping though/one feed, then regress at 4/5 months as Thandeka says. They are learning so much their little brains can't cope, and they wake up more frequently. If she is taking a full feed, it may well be a growth spurt instead/as well (joy!).

My 20 week DS is waking more, having previously slept for at least 8 hours and occasionally 12 hours (ah, the good old days!), but he is absolutely ravenous every 3 hours (at most!) in the night now. That said, it seems to be easing off now, only up twice last night (touch wood)

Some HV's do talk a load of bollocks! If it helps, when I chatted to my HV with the same scenario, she advised me to ride it out, and like everything else, it would pass.

Hope it gets easier for you soon.

I don't think there are any accepted guidelines about nightfeeds at 6mths or indeed at any time, Getthepartystarted - at least, not national, official ones. Are there some local to you, maybe?

It's a shame the OP's HV felt unable to explain, and support, the normal behaviour of a baby of this very young age

Thanks so much for all your responses, you've put my mind at rest and I'll carry on as normal feeding her during the night if I think she's hungry. Luckily I can function on not much sleep so don't actually mind the night feeds too much.

Prettycandles, I'd love to try a dreamfeed but worried it will backfire on me as DD tends to have her longest stretch between 7pm and 1am ish then feeds become more frequent after that. I'm worried that if she feeds at 10 or 11ish, she'll be up again in 3 hours or so. I wish I could get more feeds in her during the day but she's a snacker and will only feed for 10 mins max, roughly every 2 hours. I keep trying to feed her more in the evening but she's either too sleepy or just not interested unfortunately.

I keep hearing about the dreaded 4 month sleep regression, I was wondering if that could have anything to do with it as the increased night wakings have coincided with her losing the ability to nap for longer than 30 mins during the day!

I think next time I will trust my instincts and not worry too much about what the hv says. Tiktok - absolutely some support would have been nice, I felt like I was getting a ticking off instead!

Thanks again for your advice.

Y'know what, Victoria? If it ain't broke - don't fix it!

If this works for you, then never mind what the HV said. You can always look at the situation again in a week or a month or whenever. By which time things may have changed again. Babies and what they do change all the time. Enjoy the moment.

When I read your opening post Victoria the 2nd paragraph jumped out at me because it is just like my 16 week old DS!!!!

He is doing the same as your DD, and from what I've read on here about the mystical 4 month sleep regression, our DCs are the only ones.

I spoke to my HV and she gave me lots of sympathetic looks and said that DS was totally normal and to just ride it out as best I could.

I live in hope of more sleep sometime soon!

hate to tell you this guys but at 20weeks my dd just started feeding every 90mins on monday night and every 40mins last night. Am a wreck.

Thandeka gibbers "and this to shall pass, and this too shall pass"

This bit annoyed me:

'The hv reckoned that because she has proved she can sleep through before, when she wakes now she is just wanting to feed for comfort.'

I mean really, how dare a baby expect comfort at night.

OP - you sound like a lovely responsive mother. Lucky DD

Diagree with your HV. DS woke in the night for milk until he was about 15 months.

Some of it partly was habit but he was always genuinely hungry (big baby and now a big boy).

Sod your HV. Do what you think is best.

Yes, do agree that a baby should get comfort feeds if that is what they need.

Another one who disagrees with your HV. 16 weeks is still really young...and if your baby if taking good feeds, then its obviously out of hunger.

Not sure why you don't give the dreamfeed a go? If she goes 7-1pm, then a feed at 10 or 11 might push her further...or she'll be up as usual at 1am, in which case you're no worse off. You don't actually wake her, just feed her while she's asleep.

My DS is 13 weeks and has just started sleeping up to 6 hour stretches (having done 2-3 hours)....but I have an eye on the 4 months looming

And how dare a baby want some comfort I sometimes wonder how and why some people ever had babies themselves!!

Sounds similar to my DD. She slept for 7-8 hours from about 8 weeks but when she hit 4 months it all went to pot! 4-6 months was really hard, I felt like a walking zombie most of the time.

DD is 6.5 mo now and for the last few nights she has slept for 9-10 hours . Just go with the flow, it will hopefully pass soon.

ridiculous advice babies feed at night. my ds still fed at night at 22 months

Sounds like 4 months is a difficult time for most parents! Thandeka, you poor thing you must be exhausted hope things get better for you soon. We've had a few wakings after 90 mins but for the most part she generally goes at least 2-3 hours.

I intended to try a dreamfeed last night so expressed 6oz but that plan got abandoned when she woke at 11pm and i ended up giving her the bottle then. She seemed starving and downed it in minutes, then was up again at 2 and 5.

Pdog 'just go with the flow' is very sensible advice!

4 months is a difficult time, indeed, but it helps to know that it's common and passes.

Definitely she's too young to stop feeding if she's waking and asking for it. And what's wrong with waking for comfort? Are you supposed to withhold comfort from 16 week old babies, then?

But I have to say
"if I didn't nip it in the bud she would still be feeding in the night at 6 months and it would be hard to get her to sleep through"

• well, she might well still be feeding in the night at 6 months, yes. And that would be entirely normal as well.

I totally agree re waking for comfort. If she needs comforting then I have no problem with this after all she's still only a tiny baby, and even at 6 months their requirement for food/comfort doesn't stop.

I think theres a lot of pressure on parents to get their babies to be sleeping through the night asap. Its the first question most people ask you and its as if you're doing something wrong if your baby's not sleeping through. 6 month seems to be the magic number, in terms of when your baby 'should' be sleeping through, I wonder how many actually do though. I've tried to have fairly realistic expectations and new that uninterrupted sleep would be a thing of the past. Actually I've been pleasantly surprised at the amount of sleep we've been able to get and even though its a bit more difficult recently I feel that we've been fairly lucky. Anyway, bit of an off topic rant there! Thanks again for all your opinions I feel much better now.

sleeping through the night at 6 months? my DD is 6.5 months and has never slept for more than 4 hours in a single stretch. she has always woken up frequently (often every 2 hours) at night. i too am happy to give her comfort / food, whatever she needs. surely thats the point of being a mum...

my hv said that night feeds are important because there is a different hormone? in the milk. she seems on the same wavelength as me i.e. no CC and comfort if thats whats needed. i would say you are doing a fab job.

16 week is classic growth spurt time, what you describe is what i would expect (and what i experienced) at 16 weeks. HV sounds as though she needs a refresher course in how BF works.