advice from breastfeeding counsellor?

[belindarose]

I was speaking to the qualified bfc at my children's centre today about my 10 mo DD. Just an idle query really about whether her feeding was typical for her age (4 -5 feeds per day and 1 -2 at night. Didn't admit to the night feeds as bfc has already 'told me off' for them and I couldn't be bothered to defend myself). She was horrified I was feeding so much and said I should really be dropping feeds, one at a time, so as to 'prepare her for giving up'. She then said that BF after the age of one was 'unnecessary' and that it 'might be a wrench' for me to stop but 'baby doesn't need it' (she does know my DD's name!).
I don't know who she's trained by, but all the literature for the children's centre advertises her as a 'qualified bfc'. What do you think about this advice? It's made me query what I'm doing and I thought we were doing fine. I certainly wasn't planning on weaning yet.

you don't get a qualificationb when you do your training tho do you?
a breastfeeding counsellor normally ends up with a diploma

belindarose - is there anyone else in your area concerned with bf support? If they have anything about them at all, they may well know how useless this person is.

Can you encourage them to do something about her?

I wasn't meaning to imply you were dissing peer support.

Are their brochures online, belindarose? Can you link to them? Or to your children's centres information?

that's a good idea tiktok

i once talked to my LLL leader when our local BF cafe was training peer supporters using LLL literature, but the person doing the training clearly wasn't that up to date and was giving out some awful advice.

they said they'd look into it

Ha Ha, I just made another grown woman use the word dissing

Just checked - it says she was a midwife and they describe her as a 'highly experienced healthcare professional'. She writes that she's 'attended courses on breastfeeding support'. I don't want to link, thank you, just in case she's reading this!! Is that really paranoid?

"I do know she has encouraged other mums to BF on schedule rather than demand, "

You really need to complain about her. She is not supporting anyone but more likely undermining which leads to a lot of women simply giving up.

Attended courses could be anything from a half day seminar to years of bfc training.....

It's highly unlikely that she is reading, but if you don't feel comfortable linking then you shouldn't.

who is the centre run by?

luciemule - we can't say "you must do x" or "y worked for me" - telling someone what to do. We can say "you could try a or b" - advice based on what we have learned and the experience of those we know.

It's a fine line - counselling/advice/support

It's not a qualification, no, it just makes sure we have the right information so not peddling bullshit and the skills needed to listen to someone and not judge them.

The other bf support group I've been to in this area is run by nursery nurses. The 'advice' there was even more suspect, if possible. I overheard one mum of a lowish-weight gain 5 month old to 'just try to get something else into him'. As it's more of a peer group thing, several of us butted into that discussion with our own experiences of trying to bf more often!

I am a HCP, I have just done some training as a peer supporter with my local childrens centre, and am waiting to do the mother supporter training with the ABM.

What this 'bfc' has told you is utter tosh. I would be extremely surprised if she has been trained by one of the BF associations, as I am fairly sure that a 'proper' BFC would not give this sort of advice.

I would have a word with the Childrens Centre manager and just ask what training/qualification this person has, there is no problem in doing that at all, and she should be happy to tell you.

FWIW, my DS is 18mo and was still feeding once/twice a night until recently. Plus on demand in the day, so 2-5 feeds depending on what he felt like. Your DD's feeding sounds great to me, as long as you are both happy with it.

It's a surestart centre.

The manager of my local one is lovely, very approachable, and would not take the least offense at being asked, after all is she is fully qualified they will be happy to let everyone know this, surely?

belindarose, you could ask in a polite and tentatuve way, 'hope you don't mind me bringing this up but I have been a bit taken aback by some of the information and advice I have had from X. It's happened more than once, and just last week, she did it again....I know the centre tries hard to support breastfeeding, but I feel a bit unhappy that some of the things she's saying are not really helpful....'

This takes it away from 'is she really qualified?' because it seems clear she is not, beyond having a midwifery qual. and doing courses. Your real beef is not that she is not qualified, but that the quality of her support is so poor, anyway.

I'm a Certified Lactation Counselor in the US and my 18 month old still has 4 daytime feeds and one or two night feeds

This woman sounds hopelessly out of date. Feed your baby as often as you and your baby are happy with for as long as you are happy with.

We had it drummed into us not to judge or issue commands to mothers - there was even a song to this effect. (Shudders at memory of daily enforced singing.)

CarmenSanDiego please do share...

CarmenSanDiego please do share...

Oh dear. Ok, to the tune of Frere Jacques....

When you counsel, when you counsel
Never judge, never judge
Praise mother and baby
Praise mother and baby
Don't command. Do suggest

And verse two... they saved this one for a few days before revealing the horror:

When you're pumping, when you're pumping
Never rush, never rush
Think about your baby, think about your baby
Then you'll gush. Then you'll gush

There were actual paediatricians in the class singing this.

carmen fantastic!!!! Must use this in my training to NHS HVs next week (but definitely don't see them joining in!)

sorry belinda I got carried away by that song there!

I actually think that you have a moral obligation to question what exactly this woman's qualifications are-feeding babies is serious business! I've been in situations where a) I have had my own qualifications questioned and not had any problem with it as I am qualified to the hilt in what I do and I like to know that people feel confident enough around me that they CAN iyswim and b)I have questioned others qualifications in a non-aggressive, I hope you don't mind me asking kind of way, which did feel a little uncomfortable and un-British of me but did reassure me.

A retired midwife for example, could not hold up qualifications received years ago, to scrutiny, IMO.

Carmen I shall suggest a couple of rounds at our local bf drop in tomorrow............. . I love the idea of paediatricians singing this too.

Good luck and do complain. We had a very shite questionable bf woman at our local CC and parents complained about her. She went away and they got someone else who is better. If your area is going for baby friendly then the CC will want to know because if she starts spouting that sort of nonsense she might jeopardise baby friendly.

Oh, I do hope the song makes a transatlantic leap so you can share in the shuffling embarrassment uplifting joy!

Bear in mind this from the Baby Friendly iniative. To be baby friendly, hospital staff must meet these training requirements in breastfeeding: "Nursing staff with primary responsibility for helping mothers initiate breastfeeding should have, at minimum, 20 hours of training as identified by UNICEF. Physicians and APRNs must have a minimum of 3 hours of training."

So staff at a non baby-friendly hospital may well have considerably less.

Breastfeeding counselors with any reputable organisation do much more than 20 hours of training and have their skills assessed. With my organisation, I have to recertify every three years.

A midwife does not automatically have breastfeeding counseling skills, especially if her qualifications are ancient.