Giving up BF with a Toddler

[thatsnotmymonkey]

Hiya,

I need to give up BF for my sanity! My DS is 19m, and has become OBSESSED with my breasts. He is constantly calling me and asking to be fed .I work 4 days we days a week and the three days we have together are becoming very grating. It has been like this for a few weeks.

I only feed morning and night, so one at 6am, and then one again at 7pm, just before bed. We have been feeding like this since he was 10m. It seems like since he has began to talk, he has began to demand! I would like to hold onto the night time feed for as long as possible, but want to stop the morning one.

But really overall I need to give it up.

How should I do it, gradually, or just STOP.

Could you cut it down to just bedtime and see how it goes? He may be able to understand the principle of only at bedtime.

Just stopped feeding my 15 mth old. He almost led it. My husband did breakfast for few mornings and enjoyed a cuddle with me after. At night we had from 12 months introduced cows milk in a cup. He would feed from me then have cows milk if he wanted.
I went on principle do not offer and do not refuse. Seemed quite happy with a cuddle after few nights. A lot less stressful then I expected.

Trouble is I don't need to offer as he is always requesting it. thats the whole problem really.

How much language and understanding does he have? DD is 18 months and feeds pretty much on demand still, but I do distract sometimes during the day. I have an older child and sometimes it's not practical to sit and feed DD as we're rushing out the door to preschool etc.

She also sometimes gets the concept of 'not now, later'. For example, had some success with 'after your bath' when she was reqesting bf the other day.

At around this time toddlers can go through a bout of separation anxienty, and it's a big development time for them, so may want to bf more for reassurance.

We went through this, I was a definite phase which passed, my dd i can be reasoned with now and accepts when I say not now. She still feeds morning and evening (she's 3 in august)
If you want to keep feeding in the evening then just drop the morning feed for a bit and see how it goes, if it's still not working then drop the last feed.

Thatsnotmymonkey, really sorry if this sounds like a thread hijack but just wanted to say that you are not alone. My 19mo is exactly the same, especially since I went back to work FT a month ago, and my ex-DH took over full time care. The whole 'don't offer, don't refuse' thing just seems a million miles away when I've got a toddler who has gone from only having morning and night feeds to 'mu-mu-mu' and snuffling with hands down my top at every opportunity.

Interestingly, when I am away overnight for work, he manages perfectly well without me so I think it's become a bit of a comfort thing in our case, possibly to do with me going back to work.

A friend with a 2.2yo tells me that he was the same at this point but that by 2 her DS understood that he could have feeds at morning and night only.

Thanks for your posts everyone and chiccadee it is nice to know that I am not alone! It is quite exhausting to refuse all the time.

I have started to say "after bath" today and he is OK with that so far. We are going out for a big day at the seaside so I hope he will be too busy to want "boobie"!

Good luck!

Hi I gave up when my DS was 16 months he was a real boob monster and fed often during the day.
I simply said "all gone" and looked a bit sad every time he asked then offered an alternative. I was really worried about stopping but he was fine, we had 3 episodes of crying 5-10 mins, over two days then he stopped asking. I was really surprised how easy it was, good luck.