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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

BF baby bonding with DP? (and vice versa)

3 replies

Butterpie · 05/06/2010 01:50

7mo DD2 is bf and mostly blw, and DP hardly ever looks after her (maybe 8 hours a month, if that). He says that she just cries and cries when he looks after her and nothing he does can stop her.

She is quite a clingy baby I suppose, she does like to "snack" on bf but I have watched my mum give her a bottle of ebm so she will take it, although DPs parents say the same, that they can't settle her. She won't take a dummy and much prefers to be held or in a sling than put down and often co-sleeps with me.

DD1 was bf and DP would give her at least one bottle of ebm a day and they were fine, and DP and now 3yo DD1 get on really well now, but I worry that this isn't happening with DD2. I am working two afternoons at the weekend (luckily in child friendly jobs) and DP says he will look after DD1 but he can't look after DD2. When I said I would have to ask his mum instead then, he got upset and said he just isn't coping with the baby and he will have to take on more overtime so I don't have to work.

Any tips for getting a semi attachment baby (she does normally sleep in her moses basket or pram, just sometimes cosleeps and sometimes rides in a sling) to be attached to more than one person?

OP posts:
StealthPolarBear · 05/06/2010 06:20

We were in a similar position with similar aged children I think and I'm afraid the key is for him just to do it IMO. I still bf DS morning and night so for his night feed I used to give DD to DH and from the point at which she wasn't asleep all the time (so maybe about a month) she cried all that time. It was horrible and if it was really bad he'd bring her in to me and I'd try to feed both.
We did everything different with DD - no ebm, co sleeping, she could never really be put down. A couple of months ago (maybe longer) something just clicked and she no longer cried for DH at DS's bedtime. Instead he boresreads her to sleep, and in fact he's better at getting her to sleep if she won't feed to sleep with me.
Yesterday she stayed with my mum for 5 hours in the morning while I went to a meeting, and she was absolutely fine DH is looking after her next Wednesday so we'll see how he copes all day ...

StealthPolarBear · 05/06/2010 06:21

Sorry, not much help or actual advice, but we are dealing with the same thing

Butterpie · 05/06/2010 10:05

Good to hear it's not just us then!

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