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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Original poster

Would you bf if there were no proven health benefits?

86 replies

dorisbonkers · 25/05/2010 09:36

Hypothetical question of course, but would you bf even if there was no proven health benefits.

I've been feeding on demand for 19 months and it's not all been plain sailing (by any means) but I think I would. It's shaped how I've parented my daughter in her early months, to an extent.

Sorry, I don't mean this as an insensitive question and I don't intend this to turn into a mega ff vs bf thread. I'm genuinely interested. Do we just put ourselves through this (it was mentally quite exhausting and worrying as she was prem and made me obsessional...)

OP posts:
ShrimpOnTheBarbie · 25/05/2010 11:13

Yes!
AliGrylls - I could imagine that would be exactly what I'd be like!
I might've been tempted to stop in the first 6 weeks of DD1's life if it hadn't been for the health benefits - but when we had a powercut (first of many that summer - live in rural Aus) and had no fridge and no water (on tank water) for 36 hours, I was extremely grateful for persevering. And have never looked back. Fed DD1 to 15 months and DD2 going strong at 7 months.

PotPourri · 25/05/2010 11:29

Yes, it was some kind of maternal urge - I felt like it made me a real woman. Having failed to meet my own high standards 3 times, I havefinally managed it the 4th time. I never had any intention of not trying again. Saying that, it has been bloody awful at times, but I would do it again and am so proud of myself.

tbh, the health benefits were really not on my mind much

OrmRenewed · 25/05/2010 11:32

Yes. I didn't really bf for the health benefits. I did it because it was the obvious thing to do, convenient, made me feel v close to my babies and cheap.

MathsMadMummy · 25/05/2010 11:37

absolutely - we were talking about this at training (going to be a peer supporter) and agreed it was a 'no-brainer'.

DD was mix fed (not through choice) and this time round with DS (just BF) I'm seeing more of all the other benefits - easier to go out, no expense etc.

I can also honestly say that I'm a little closer to DS than I was with DD.

IWishIWereWitty · 25/05/2010 11:42

I said to a friend the other day about breastfeeding that it is not really about the milk (although that is obviously fab), but about the contact and the fact that it means Mum and baby have to stay together and that your baby is learning that comfort comes from another human being.
I breastfed at the beginning because it was the best milk for my baby, but by the end I realised that the actual milk was only one of many benefits.
So Yes I would definitely.

hazeyjane · 25/05/2010 12:11

I don't want to turn this into a bf/ff thing.

But I do just have to say that the 'emotional closeness' thing is a bit of a bugbear. I guess one of the things that makes failing at b'feeding such a huge emotional wrench, is that it feel as though you are failing at this most basic and nurturing part of motherhood - so obviously it is about more than just nutrition, and there is an enormous emotional element to it.

But - when things went wrong with trying to feed dd1, I wanted f'feeding to be a bonding and close experience with her, she snuggled in bed with me, skin to skin, I didn't want anyone else to feed her. I think that they are learning that 'comfort comes from another human being' thing when they are f'fed as well.

TBH, trying to bfeed was such a nightmare, that when I switched to f'feeding, the whole feeding experience became so much more pleasurable for both of us, and dd1 stopped screaming and scratching at everything at every feed, and I stopped crying everytime I tried to feed her.

Morloth · 25/05/2010 12:18

Yes, its free and its there and offers an easy way of comforting baby along with nutrition. Having said that, I have had an easy time so might feel differently if I had struggled.

charleymouse · 25/05/2010 13:44

absolutely, easy/with you at all times/right temperature/sterile/convenient/comforting to both mum and baby/keeps me in control/cuddly & snuggly/free/lovely eye contact and hand holding opportunity/satisfying.

vinauchocolat · 25/05/2010 13:50

well I don't need to sterilise my breasts or warm them up or boil water and take bottles with me and I can BF hands free, so for someone pretty lazy BFing is brilliant

Greythorne · 25/05/2010 13:56

Yes, I would definitely:

  • I am lazy (CBA to sterilise, wash, make up bottles)
  • I like sitting down for 4 hours a day with a book with complete impunity ('I am breastfeeding!')
  • I love reading and bfing allows me to read and feed (I have a kindle reading device, so I can read even in the dark )
  • I love the closeness
  • I love knowing that if DC hurts herself, is upset, is overtired, is upset, I always have a tried and tested remedy on hand, no waiting, no bother
  • allows me to travel, took 36 flights with DD1 in her first year (we live in France and came back to UK loads to see my parents and family) and never had any probs, despite delays etc

Loads of reasons above and beyond health ones. In fact, the health reasons are rather low down my list of reasons to bf!

ItsAllGoingToBeFine · 25/05/2010 14:09

Yes I am both skint and lazy

Crazycatlady · 25/05/2010 14:12

Yes I would, up to a point. I fed DD for 11 months and she wasn't the easiest baby to feed at times but I kept doing it because:

  • I found it less hassle, particularly dealing with night feeds
  • no bottles to lug about/sterilise
  • cheaper - even allowing for copious Lansinoh and a Medela pump
  • environmentally sound
  • quite liked the idea of my body being responsible for her growth... felt like an extension of pregnancy and I was proud to do it.

All those things outweighed the downsides for me, of which there were a lot (mild mastitis x3, chomped nips in the first fortnight, always having to be on tap, feeling totally unglam, always having to think about what clothes I could BF in, having to rush home from work stressing about getting to DD for her bedtime feed)

OrganicHairbrush · 25/05/2010 14:13

Yes. It's just a lovely way to have a cuddle...

BalloonSlayer · 25/05/2010 14:13

God yes. Because it's natural to do so.

Original poster
dorisbonkers · 25/05/2010 14:13

I also have to say that I really miss the daytime sofa (catchup telly, DVD time) feeding naps.

OP posts:
Morloth · 25/05/2010 14:19

Tell you what I wouldn't do though is pump, would much prefer to use formula for that if there was no difference to DS.

Pumping is a royal PITA.

StealthPolarBear · 25/05/2010 14:22

knowing what i know now, yes

At the time, almost certainly not. ff is normal in this country and the only reason i even considered bf was because of the push by people (NHS mainly) extolling the health benefits. i would imagine that despite it being the 'normal' way to feed a baby, if it weren't for the health benefits it would be an 'alternative' thing that only a handful of hippes actually do (a bit like eating your own placenta )

jellybeans · 25/05/2010 14:27

yes because it's how it's meant to be. Also for bonding and it's easier than making ff.

StealthPolarBear · 25/05/2010 14:36

thats interesting jelly
ff is so normalised now that pred DCs (and MN) I had no idea that it was the normal way to feed a baby. Babies have bottles and dummies. If you'd quizzed me about mammals i'm sure i'd have got your questions right but would never have applied that to human adult women having babies.

CuppaTeaJanice · 25/05/2010 14:41

I think I'm in the minority, but I don't think I would bf if there were no health benefits. They are really the only reason I struggled on with it for months.

I didn't like the sore nipples at the start, the horrible complicated bras, the breast pads, the soggy sheets in the morning where they'd leaked, being stuck on the sofa unable to reach the remote control when DP had left the football on and walked out of the room , having to think about ease of access when getting dressed in the morning, trying to latch DS on in public without giving passing strangers an eyeful, squirting milk everywhere if he pulled away, and that awful milking machine I was hooked up to constantly.

I've never really understood the closeness thing either. With BF, DS was a good foot away looking at my chest, with his body propped up on cushions. FF, and we're lying down, hugging and staring lovingly into each others eyes.

StealthPolarBear · 25/05/2010 14:42

goodness me Janice how big are your norks??

StealthPolarBear · 25/05/2010 14:44

thinking about it I would NEVER have expressed though - would have just got him used to formula early on.
DD is 8 months, am going to a few work things over the next month or so, and am trying to express, simply because I think she will reject the smell/taste of formula. It's such a pain!

BertieBotts · 25/05/2010 14:47

hazeyjane I think that is a good point. I think it's most likely of great benefit to bottlefeed in the way you describe.

In answer to the OP, yes, I would - health benefits didn't really come into it for me. When I made the decision I (wrongly) thought that BF and FF were pretty much equal, I hadn't given it much thought. But I like the fact it's always available and requires no preparation etc.

I don't think it is a no-brainer though - everyone is different, and we all have different preferences. Some people don't like the fact you can't see how much they are getting (though I don't mind this because if I think my baby is still hungry, I can just feed him again) and some people like the fact they can share feeding when bottlefeeding (which again didn't bother me) - I think if you take health benefits out of the equation, the convenience and attractiveness of either option is very subjective.

Haliborange · 25/05/2010 14:49

One thing that might have kept me going with DD1 in the absence of health benefits is that at the time after a rough pregnancy and terribly hard birth ending in emcs I felt as though BF was the first mummy thing that I was actually good at. With hindsight I know she was a good and easy feeder, but at the time I think that BF helped keep me from depression.

slim22 · 25/05/2010 14:51

YES