Breastfeeding advice needed please

[Beachbreak]

I am a first time mum to a 5wk old baby boy. He was in special care for 2 wks so I expressed to keep my milk as I really want to breastfeed and give him the best start I can. A bf counsellor saw us before we came home and I have seen one again since and gone to the bf support group at my locAl hospital as I am really struggling.

But I still can't seem to latch him on without pain. I used nipple sheilds and my nipples r no longer cracked but I find it impossible to latch him on properly with them, he knocks it off with his hands and can't get it in his mouth properly. It's easier without them but the pain is so bad and my nipples look as pink and raw as they feel!

I dread his feeds and don't want him to wake up. I'm exhausted from nights spent lactching him on then taking him off because it hurts do much again and again with me crying with frustration and pain and him wailing with hunger. Why cAn't I feed my son? Theni feel guilty ifi give him formula but I rely am at the end of my tether and just feel like giving up. Has anyone been through this too? Any advice?

I think MOST people have been through this, for sure!

Firstly can you get to the breastfeeding group again so you can watch how other mums do it and get some advice?

Secondly, if you let him approach your nipple sort of from underneath (so he has to reach up with a bid wide mouth) that might help the latch.

Thirdly, make sure you are treating yourself to lots of nourishing but special stuff to eat and drink - like smoothies - to keep your energy and spirits up

bid big

beachbreak - how difficult, and a shame after your early struggles, too

I think you will be best helped by someone seeing what you are doing. You can ask the bf counsellor again, perhaps.

I disagree with Wellies, sorry, that most people have gone through this. Some do, for sure, but your issues are serious - the long-term pain and the fighting to get him on, after 5 weeks, are not what breastfeeding is usually about, fortunately. You do need proper help, and I hope you get it.

Was like this with my first son and know exactly how you feel.

You need someone to help you with your latch. Is there any breastfeeding cafes near you as you will get lots of help there.
The La Leche League and NCT also have telephone helplines with the La Leche League also running regular groups.

On www.Kellymom.com there is a link to Jack Newman videos on getting a good latch. If you can not see a link on the site search Jack Newman breastfeeding videos on youtube as I found them a great help.

I presume your using a nipple cream like lanoish or similar as that will help soothe whilst your working on the latch.

The best position I found for getting a good latch was the football hold as I could see better what I was doing and my DS seemed to get his mouth open wider.

I also found feeding before they were too hungry too as they are less frantic trying to get food.

I hope you get some good support as it was very difficult days when I had similar problems

ok, I'll amend... most bf people I know (a fair amount), including me with both my boys

Been through this twice, 6 weeks of pain with my first. Now at twelve weeks with my second, it's not painful anymore but have other problems caused by not latching well. The best advice is to see someone who can address what is going wrong. It made all the difference with DS1. It does not miraculously sort itself out. Now I must just heed my own advice.

But small things that help me include sitting in a good chair with a nursing cushion, elevating the head with blankets where necessary, saying tummy to mummy, nose to nipple as I position, and using my thumb to help the nip into the mouth. It makes more sense when you actually see it. I remember all these things from seeing a counsellor 2 years ago but am still not managing to get it right all the time.

Want to add that I also dreaded the feeds with ds1 in the early weeks. Even with ds2, I've been feeling a bit ambivalent because it's been so hard. But when it works, it really is such a wonderful experience and well worth forging on through the difficult bits.

Thank you for the supportive messages, it helps to know I'm not the only one struggling (not that I'd wish this on anyone else but you know what I mean). The YouTube videos were interesting, different advice to the bf counsellor but what I've been shown isn't working so def up 4 trying alternatives, I think the swaddling him idea sounds a sensible solution to flailing hands, thanks mums. (although ithink i'll leave trying these things til tomorrow...ihad such a bad night last night I'm wimping out and expressing/bottle & topping up with formula today...need to keep sane...)