Help!!! Any bf pro's about? Need some advice for friend in distress!!!

[devotion]

Hello
Just been to try and help a friend get her baby to latch on but failed. Felt terrible and was sure I could help her after bf my own three children.

Details:
The baby is 3.5 weeks old and has only latched on twice at the hospital.

The baby was 6lbs born and has a very small mouth and does not open very wide - been checked for tongue tie.

Mum really really wants to bf and for the first weeb expressed and fed feeds by cup and tried to latch baby on at every feed.

Now she is using Avent bottles and mixing with formula. She expresses up to 10 times a day and says that it feels they are never empty. Every two hours she feels a let down so she has plenty of milk.

I went up and got mum to relax on couch she stripped from the top and we stripped baby for some skin to skin first, mum squeezed some milk on her nipple, aimed nipple in and held chin down to help open mouth but baby just held mouth still and for very upset and then shut mouth.

I really feel for mum and dont know what the odds are for getting her latched on.

i could see babies tongue was white so told her to get it checked for thrush because that would effect the latch.

she does not do much skin to skin so i told her to do it as much as possible from now on.

i also told her to change the teats she uses as avent are so far away from nipples - can you anyone recommed a good teat?

any advice you can offer would be REALLY appreciated.

she has had 10 people try to help her latch the baby on including two midwives. she is waiting for an nct councelloe to contact her about a visit.

what can i do to help her and is it possible at 3.5 weeks to latch her on?

bump!

i really feel she has been let down by the hospital and midwives, she stayed in an extra day to establish feeding and they let her go without doing that?

she has spoke to so many people and no-one has really helped her.

i just wish i could give her some good advice.

Hi devotion - hope your friend gets some RL help soon.
Lots of folks on MN recommended Breastflow bottles to me. Available online & in some Mothercare stores. The action is a bit more like BF.

Something similar happened to me and we managed to get DD back to the breast with help from an Infant Feeding Advisor. In the meantime, you're right about masses and masses of skin-to-skin. Try Mum feeding the baby in a nice warm bath. I was advised to try latching DD when she was relaxed - rather than when she was frantic starving IYSWIM - so top up a wee bit before putting the baby to the breast if it's screaming hungry. Lots of videos on the Jack Newman website for how to latch on. We talked about rebirthing DD but it wasn't needed in the end. Your friend needs to pump lots to maintain supply incl. I believe at least once in the night (between midnight & 6am). Pump even when there seems to be nothing there to stimulate supply.

I hope someone comes to see her soon. You're a good friend

Not much to add but thinking of you and your friend.

Been trying to find a diagram for the "Dancer Hand position" and the only one I can find is on this document about feeding babies with cleft lips.

Has she tried that position, it is often used with babies that are struggling to latch on.

But I agree she really needs the expertise of a breastfeeding counsellor.

Has she tried Biological Nursing? It's a very effective yet 'low key' way to encourage a reluctant baby to nurse. I saw Dr Suzanne Colson speak of her experience using the Biological nursing method to get a baby that hadn't latched on to mum for it's first 3 days latch on and feed within 5 minutes. It uses the baby's own reflexes to initiate a breast feed rather than the mother trying to get baby to latch on.

The links are here for 'how to' and here for a video clip.

Hope your friend manages to breast feed no matter which method/advice/position used Different strokes for different folks!

I think MAM bottles have a good teat shape - have always bfed my kids but used MAM for their one bottle a night that dh does. They have more of a flat shape...here

www.mamonlineshop.com/acatalog/Bottle_Accessories.html

(I found those tommi tippee 'closer to nature' ones a load of rubbish that they claim are more like bfeeding)

Hope she gets some help soon - i got help with my latch the other day and has made the world of difference.

I had a 5 week premmie who then had jaundice and couldn't latch. By the time we left hospital after two weeks he was rather keen on the bottle and I struggled to get him interested in nipple. I had a midwife visiting me every day at home for the first 10 days (great system in Germany) and in the end what worked was only giving water from the bottle - he soon worked out that he would have to take the nipple if he wanted the good stuff - and I mean quick. Still it was with nipple shields as my nipples were shredded by that time and he seemed to have trouble getting a hold of the real thing. They did not affect my supply and he thrived and I dropped them altogether by 4 mths. I know they are not favoured by a lot of midwives - but whatever works right? HTH, Sim

I had a 6lb baby who would not latch - this all sounds very similar. I eventually got her to latch at day 5 with nipple shields (I used the medela ones I got them from Tesco). I was supported in their use by a bf counsellor (NHS) but the NCT lady and the HV were far less supportive. However, I now I have a very healthy and smiley 16 week year old - she is still small but so am I. She still uses the shields and as I said to HV this afternoon it is shields or formula. I would really recommend your friend giving them a go - I also have some tips for helping baby to latch with them if necessary. Good luck!