We could do with some slow weight gain support...

[ilovegreenbeans]

...seems there's a few people going through this right now including me!

A bit of my history: DD1 was born at 8lb9 and I was very anaemic after her birth. She lost weight continuously until 4 weeks when we started top ups. She then gained well, but unfortunately stopped bf by 13 weeks. She's now 2 and happy and healthy.

DD2 is 9wks, breastfed and her weight gain has been very slow so far. She was much bigger at 10lb14, but went to 9lb12 at 10 days and basically stayed static until 6 weeks. She then gained 2 oz, 4oz and 4oz again this past week. So she's around 10lb6 now. I've had great support and feel really good to still be bfing her but it's such a struggle. She fed constantly for the first 7 weeks and it's calmed down a bit now, but she's still feeding every 2.5ish hours. She always takes 4 sides at every feed. I think it's a bit of a combination of a low milk supply in me (given my history), and some catch-down growth due to her being so big to start. She's lovely, smiley and alert, lots of wet and dirty nappies, long but not very chubby.

So there's me. Is anyone else in a similar boat wrt weight gain? Want to come join me for some support?

hello! yes. I've just started another thread about some issues we're having with weight gain which may or may not be related to a cow's milk allergy. DS was 25th centile when born (6lb 11) and had a great first few weeks, didn't lose any weight really and stayed on 25th til at least 8 weeks, but then started dropping down the centiles. Is now 20 weeks and at 4th centile - was 12lb 6oz when weighed earlier this week.

Frankly he doesn't seem much interested in feeding - has never done the constant feeding thing (which I thought was a good thing but now not so sure!). Never feeds for more than 10 minutes and sometimes less and sleeps ok at night (bed at 7, up at 7, wakes once or twice for a feed inbetween times).

Have spent today in bed with him trying to convince him to eat more as am v worried about my supply - but he's still not interested. Sings at my boobs rather than sucks. Cute...but not going to turn him into a chubster!

Wondering whether to move onto hypoallergenic formula for some feeds as v concerned he's not getting enough milk.

Are you giving any formula? And how long are you feeding for? At what stage do you swap sides?

Hi BordersMummy- how are you guys today? I hope your weekend in bed helped.

I am now giving 1 bottle of formula as part of the dreamfeed as an attempt to get some extra milk into her! We normally feed for at least 30 min, and she wants to swap sides after 10-15 min, then back for about 5 each again if that makes sense.

Gotta go help DD1 but I'll be back!

have posted something on our march thread ilgb

dc8 now 10 weeks started on 50th centile 7lbs 5oz dropped to 6lbs 8oz eventually regained and went over her birth weight at 3 weeks . followed the 9th centile until 7 weeks then dropped to close to 2nd centile at 8 weeks . weight gain has been on average 3 to 4 oz per week on 2 occasions gaining 8oz when we tought we'd turned a corner only to go back to her usual 3oz gain the next week . hvs unconcerned as she is bright alert and content with plenty of weight dirty nappies etc .
have fed the other 7 dcs for between 18mths and 30 mths so thought i knew what i was doing .they were all fast growers gaining 6 to 8 oz per week (at 10 weeks they were all well between 123 and 14 lbs. i have really lost confidence with dc8 and am concerned there is a problem im missing . hoping to speak to hv tomorrow and get a referral to paeds. i think it maybe that shes a very contented placid wee thing who has slept from 10 to 5 since birth but is also quite fidgety constantly moving legs and arms and food doesnt seem high on her list of priorities.
bordersmum isee your lo is 20wks in 4 weeks you can start giving small amounts of solids .up until 5 or 6 years weaning at 16 weeks was recommended by hvs . i vaguely remember it is quite common to gain more slowly at this stage as they are beginning to require more than just milk and are also becoming more active and also going longer at night .
ilgbs i think the fact she is now gaining 4oz week on week must be a good sign. keep persevering .she was a very big girl at birth and maybe shes had to find her own centile . is dd1 petite or she average probably her little sister is just like her .

my ds1 is 4yo - healthy, bright, and very happy. He was born on the 50th percentile and quickly dropped to the 2nd percentile where he probably is to this day. Some babies are just small and/or skinny. You cannot make these babies turn into chubby babies. Try to resist the pressure to do so, and you will be much happier and relaxed for it.

Hi all. Yes oil and At least the lib dems will take the edge off. I hope. I agree with you. Actually that's one of the reasons why a thread like this is useful as it's people in RL (I.e. HVs) who seem to think following a line is important. I actually said I wasn't going to go to baby weigh ins at all and only found out about DS slipping down centiles because of other health issues and it is only because of those issues that I'm paying attention to weight now as it could indicate he is not digesting milk and getting nutrition he needs. I don't think chubbing up is important at all but in our case it could indicate that he is not suffering ill effects of his allergies. I guess we all have our reasons for worrying about things and that's fine.

Mumof8: did you get a paeds referral?

I'mout of contact for a couple of days now but will be back...

Bordersmummy- I made a similar decision not to see HV with DD2 based on experiencees with DD1, but they called yesterday and want to come to the house to weigh DD2.......damn them!

Background: DD1 was 7lbs1oz when born two weeks early after a five-day induction. She dropped to 6lbs 13oz in the following 24 hours. She was bottle-fed during the jaundice days as my milk didn't come in to day five and slept through the night from the 10pm feed at 12 weeks. HV however was adamant that she wasn't putting on enough weight every week (tended to be 2oz or so) despite the fact that she followed the trend line she dropped to. She was born near 50th and dropped to 25th. She still follows the same line, and has always been petite. When DD2 arrived 12 weeks ago we had exactly the same* experience. Slow discharge from MW as she was slow to regain birthweight, then I couldn't go/didn't want to go to HV as she is a happy baby and is sleeping through the night.

After my experience with HV at 12 weeks with DD1 where HV ordered me to use formula top-ups without talking it through/explainign the concerns about weight loss/suggesting other things first, I bought a set of baby scales online to monitor weight and never went back. Despite having PND they never checked on me until the 8-12 month check. This time round DH insists he cvan't find the scales in the loft (which is very annoying) but they are paying more attention, which I could have done with as a first time parent but not now that I have two girls to juggle.

I appreciate that they are trying to do their jobs but they need to work oon their custonmer service skills, look at family history and, based upon the sheer number of people I have come across who had exactly the same experience with an HV, change their procedures. When so many women are stressed out at such an early stage by HVs, it affects their confidence to look after their own children. Which means they don't enjoy being a parent as much, which is a tough enough Gig as it is. Why do we have the phrase "Mother knows best" if HVs do????

Oh my good God- so sorry for the long post. Clearly a soap box moment. Or maybbe I'm nervous about today's weigh-in!

pand p can i join you on the soapbox this centile thing seems to b the be all and end all for many hvs they dont look at the whole baby or whole family . if our lo was no 1 i would have been persuaded to supplement or stop bf long ago . as she 's no 8 i feel more able to stand up to the hvs and i hope they are more willing to listen and trust meto me . doesn't stop te worry though or the feeling of being under pressure .

am debating going to weigh-in today as I feel worried still that she's not getting enough milk- despite a really good night's sleep! I think it would give me some peace of mind, but on the other hand might give it a miss as it could just stress me out more...

But I know what you're talking about- I've been much more confident in what I'm doing with DD2 than I was with DD1. Not sure her situation would have been different, but I probably would have coped better.

You do know you don't have to let them into the house, don't you

Tell them you are happy with her helath - if she looks happy, healthy and alert and is meeting milestones, what is the problem?

prettybird, for me it's still a confidence thing as in if something WAS wrong and I was missing it... that's why I get her weighed. Although I'm much more relaxed than the first time around, I still lack the confidence in my body to nourish her properly. But you're right, we don't HAVE to do anything where hvs are concerned and I have gotten really good at going to the clinic, getting her weighed and walking right out again!

I know exactly how you feel. dd was born prematurely at 30 weeks weighing 3lb 10 oz, which incredibly was on the 75th centile (corrected), she then dropped down the centiles settling at the 25th for a while but at 6 months dropped between 2nd and 9th. She has now gone up to between 9th and 25th but will drop off the charts in 2 months when they stop correcting the weight. She is 44 weeks (34 corrected) and weighs 16lb 4oz.
I was advised to do top ups but couldn't because dd refused to have a bottle and she started getting very distracted when feeding during the day - so many more interesting things to do/look at than feed! I used to dread the weekly weigh in but was given a set of scales and now weigh her at home. This has made a huge difference to my stress levels. One h/v said I should look at the baby rather than the weight gain - dd is happy and alert. That did put my mind at rest a bit. I agree that some babies are not meant to be chubsters. dd is long and petite and although ds was a big baby at birth, he was a similar build (and still is) so maybe dd is exactly as she should be.

Ilovemygreens - are you using a WHO growth chart?

sorry I mean ilovegreenbeans

just marking my place - back later, hopefully

ladylush - which chart the OP is using is not really important at this stage. The newer charts (issued May 2009) and the older ones are almost identical until the age of about 5 mths onwards.

tiktok Oh I see. At dd's stage there does appear to be a significant difference, as she is a centile higher on the WHO chart.

Yes - there would be, as your dd is rather older than 9 weeks

well, it is a WHO chart in my book, but it doesn't make much difference really- I'm not even looking at charts, I just would like to see her weigh more each week!

tiktok, can I ask you opinion on my situation? I weighed her again today and since last Thursday she's gained 2oz. (I know it's not quite a week) So, over the past 4 weeks she has an average 3oz/week gain. I know this is slow, but what else can I do? I don't want to offer more formula (she gets 4oz as part of a dreamfeed) unless the situation worsens and I feed her a lot during the day and 1-2 times at night (we were co-sleeping but I was so so tired after 9 weeks of it that I've started putting her back in her basket after feeds). Any advice?

greenbeans - good practice is not to weigh healthy babies more often than monthly after they have regained their birthweight in the first 6 mths and thereafter no more often than once every two months until the age of a year. The reason for this is that accurate, clinical-helpful information is just not possible with frequent weighings.

Unless there is a good reason to weigh more often than this....hard to tell from your posts, though I understand that your dd was very prem. This would not normally mean frequent weighing for this long, though, if she is healthy now.

If your dd is fine, and healthy, and thriving, and it sounds as if she is, maybe now is the time to i) stop weighing and b) stop worrying

I can't see any reason why she is being weighed every week - what does the HV say about this frequency? Do they still think it's necessary?

no, she isn't at birthweight yet (10lb8 this week) and she was born at term- that's why we're still weighing weekly.

Sorry, greenbeans, I was mixing you up with ladylush

I can understand why she is being weighed often, then, in that case.

There's probably some catch-down growth present, as a baby weighing almost 11 pounds as your dd did would not be expected to stay at that level...as you suggest in your first post.

There are 'outlyers' in any data collection - babies who are off the charts, and who don't get accounted for in the final data reports, because their weight/growth skews the data. They are healthy, and they do grow, but in a pattern that raises eyebrows and concerns, and it's right that they do. Because some babies like this are this way because of some weird metabolism, odd parenting behaviours, underlying health issue, and close monitoring rules this stuff out.

The most effective way of helping a baby grow is (duh....) feeding more often. I know that 2.5 hourly sounds a lot, and you are ensuring she takes 4 sides which is good. But it's actually not all that often. In cultures where babies breastfeed in the way humans have done for 1000s of generations, babies feed scores of times in 24 hours.

I'm not saying do this. I am saying that you are doing the right thing in feeding ad lib and you could even, maybe, perhaps, squeeze in a bit more - if it was at all possible. But the main thing is that she sounds healthy and active and alert and it may be she is just meant to be the size she is

Sorry again for identity confusion!

thanks tiktok. You're very encouraging. The 2.5h feeding pattern is set by her really, I've just noticed it to be so lately! And after much more frequent feedings over the first 7 or so weeks, it was a bit of a relief really.
If she wasn't smiley and content a lot of the time I'd be more worried, but I'm just plodding on because I think it's the right thing to do for us.

tiktok - the hv did advise weekly weigh ins even beyond 6 months. This was because she stopped gaining on several occasions and dropped two centiles.