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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

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Original poster

Help! I think I've screwed up on my first night home! :(

23 replies

Koogers · 06/05/2010 05:40

I am writing this while holding my 3 day old daughter who I brought home from the hospital yesterday-everything seemed to be going well til last night-all of a sudden she wanted to feed all night! If I put her down she cried hysterically ( which she didn't do in the hospital) and when I picked her up she latched on straight away sucking frantically-she did this for 5 hours straight! Can only think maybe I didn't have enough to supply her with? Or have I been doing something totally wrong? Or some nights do they just do that? Distraught at the thought of no sleep for endless nights to come! Any advice? X

OP posts:

Monkeytoo · 06/05/2010 05:47

Hello, you haven't been doing anything wrong. This is really normal and you're doing a great job - hang in there! Your milk may not be in yet and this is part of the process of it arriving. She's sort of 'ordering it' if that makes sense. You tend to know when your milk comes in as you'll feel sort of 'engorged' and may start to drip. Right now your babies tummy is tiny and she will be getting colostrom from you which is more than enough for the first few days.

Really young babies also suck for comfort so this is part of it It can overwhelming for the first few weeks but you're doing exactly the right thing so hang in there.

This is all sounds fine to me but if you're worried that your milk isn't coming in or any other concerns then definitely contact your doctor (breastfeeding consultants can be brilliant too). There's information on the link below that will help, especially about watching out for wet / soiled nappies and also advice for what to expect (like latching on for hours and hours ).

Hang in there, you're doing a fab job and congratulations!

www.kellymom.com/bf/normal/newborn-nursing.html

Monkeytoo · 06/05/2010 05:49

Also meant to add - the lack of sleep thing is difficult but you will get through it. Everyone says sleep when the baby sleeps and it's a cliche but definitely worth it if you can. I hated this advice as I live far from family / friends but if you have anyone to help you then accept it! Also make sure you eat well and snack a lot with big glasses of water / juice and water to keep you hydrated. It is hard but passes fast.

Original poster

Koogers · 06/05/2010 05:53

Thanks Monkeytoo! Just really didn't want to start up a bad routine on my first night home! Am def going to have to try and sleep when she sleeps or I'll be a walking zombie! X

OP posts:

BertieBotts · 06/05/2010 05:55

Has your milk come in yet? Don't worry if not - it's just that they tend to suck a lot and frantically when they are trying to get it to come in. Even if it has not come in you will still have colostrum, which is like liquid gold. It is really, really, REALLY unlikely that you wouldn't have enough milk for her at this stage.

Perhaps she is just feeling unsettled because it is her first night at home? Remember she is only tiny and all her instincts tell her to get close to you and stay there for her own protection.

I personally would have found it impossible to get any sleep in the early days if I hadn't been co-sleeping, there is a great leaflet by unicef with lots of info about how to do so safely here.

BertieBotts · 06/05/2010 05:58

Oh and please do not worry about a routine yet, she is so tiny, you really can't make bad habits - she is already used to being cuddled up to you, she has been inside you for 9 months. It can help to think of the first three months as "the fourth trimester" - human babies are born earlier than any other mammal, in terms of development, which is something to do with our large brains but also means they are totally dependent on you for the first few weeks and need to be close to you as well as being fed, clean, etc.

BessieBoots · 06/05/2010 06:29

Don't worry, my 2nd DS was like this for about 10 days, and I nerly went bonkers! Midwife assured me that the more they suckle, the more milk you'll produce, which turned out to be true.

Try to get some sleep!

JackBauerIsZonerrific · 06/05/2010 07:49

Oh Koogers, it is normal but no bugger ever tells you that.
I was talking to a friend who is BFing her youngest DD having not BF any of the others and she says the best advice she could have got is that they will cluster feed, normally during the evenings for the first few weeks. Normally once you milk comes in they will settle a bit more suring the day but need feeding every few hours. the cluster feeding happens in the veneing, so still time to get to bed!
It is to increase your supply as they grow so fast these first few weeks.
If you are ready for it then it is easier to cope, just make sure you have everything you need and get comfy on teh sofa or in bed with the baby.
If you are not ready then it can come as a horrible shock adn is the main reason people start topping up with formula.

If you have tiem you can search on here for cluster feeding to see

You are doing great, take it easy as much as you can, and start getting used to daytime tv

Haliborange · 06/05/2010 07:55

I agree, utterly normal. I wish women were warned that this might well happen and that they shouldn't worry their babies are starving to death or something. My SIL was advised by her MW to top up her 2 day old baby for this exact reason (crappy advice IMO).
My DD1 did this when she was 4 days old or so. She fed - literally- from 8pm to 2am.
It does settle down but you need to let them do it because it helps establish your supply and there is no point in worrying about routine etc until you have at least got that sorted.
Don't worry, just go with it.

Morloth · 06/05/2010 08:19

Don't think about routines yet.

Go to bed with baby, cuddle her and let her feed as long as she likes. Get some lanisnoh for your nipples.

skandi1 · 06/05/2010 08:28

Normal. My DD did this after 36 hours and I had her on the boob for more than 9 hours continually just changing her from one to the other as she'd not be put down and just wanted the boob.

It woked as floods of milk came and peace was restored.

And no. no one tells you this! I phoned NHS Direct, the hospital and midwife and was frantically telling them that there was "something wrong with the baby". They were kind and didn't laugh at me but I'm now a bit thinking about it.

You're doing a fab job breast feeding and your LO is clearly hooked already
xxx

ByThePowerOfGreyskull · 06/05/2010 08:28

if it helps to passify your worries about getting things wrong the first night......

It didn't occur to me that DS was hungry, I walked sang cuddled went out in the buggy - all sorts of things that first night but didn't offer the breast once - hunger never occured to me

He is now a very happy strong 6 year old who breastfed for 11 months and seems to have forgiven me for my very early error!!

Sounds like you are going great guns.
Congratulations!!!!!!!!!!!!

OrmRenewed · 06/05/2010 08:31

Oh my lord you have not screwed up! You are doing fine. It takes a time for both of you to get it working properly. When your milk comes in properly she will settle more. Please don't worry.

Re the sleep thing, it will get better but disturbed nights are likely to be par for the course for a while. You get used to it, honest!

JackBauerIsZonerrific · 06/05/2010 08:46

BTPower, I didn;t change DD1's nappy her second night, I hadn't change one yet anyway as had had CS and aftermath so DH had done most and MW did one. The 2nd night she screamed for 2 hours and eventually a MW said 'Um...is she dirty'
Blank look from me, oh, yes, she was.

Teapot13 · 06/05/2010 09:27

A baby this little is also nocturnal. She's used to the dark. Over the course of the next 2 weeks (or so -- just my experience and what others have told me) she will start to be more wakeful in the day and sleepier at night. Try to enjoy these early days because they do go by so fast. In six months everything will be completely different.

reikizen · 06/05/2010 09:32

All perfectly normal (if tiring!) Don't even think about a routine, sleep when she sleeps and remember this too will pass. Please don't worry, you are doing exactly what your baby needs you to. (But make sure she is latched on properly or she won't be stimulating the breast properly and it will hurt like hell in a day or two). The mw should be coming today so ask her to check the latch. Good luck hon.

sweetkitty · 06/05/2010 09:33

hiya just wanted to say you are not alone, last night was our first night at home with our new DS. He's my 4th so been here before. I just let him suck all night, if he cried he went back on the boob. The quicker my milk comes in the better.

Completely normal for them to feed all night, I fed lying down a lot last night so at least I could rest a bit as I had 1 hours sleep the night before so was shattered.

Today I am going to wake him up every 2 or so hours if he is not awake to put him to the breast as well so he can get some colostrum regularly and bring my milk in faster for him.

bluecardi · 06/05/2010 09:36

Can you bf in bed? This helps me get some rest & bf at the same time.

trytobebrave · 06/05/2010 09:47

My ds did exactly this on his first night home after sleeping peacefully between feeds every night in the hospital. I was on the phone weeping to my Mum at 6am saying 'he won't go to sleep'.

It's so hard when you don't know what to expect but I second what everyone else has said about sleeping when the baby sleeps and not worrying about bad habits. My ds BFed for 12 months in the end and I never needed formula.

Congratulations on the birth of your baby.

Acanthus · 06/05/2010 09:54

It's normal. And tonight may well be totally different, so don't panic.

KEEP CALM AND CARRY ON!

FlightofFancy · 06/05/2010 10:32

I could've written your post myself 17 weeks ago (and, in fact, did!), and bf is fine and still going strong. I was told all about cluster feeding - with the implication that it's in the evening - but nobody warned me about the first night home from hospital night-of-the-long-feed... I managed until 3am before begging my DH to help - he rocked and soothed DS for a couple of hours downstairs so I could pass out, and it doesn't seem to have made any difference. The next night was easier - I was sleeping in 20-30 minute bursts, and then the next day my milk came in and peace was restored!
Good luck, you'll be fine!

domesticslattern · 06/05/2010 20:42

Congratulations Koogers!

Just to add to all of the wise words above. If you're feeling distraught and crying all the time, that's Normal Too. It's the crazy hormones working their way through your body, which kind of peak round about 3-5 days post birth. Panic not.

glittermama · 06/05/2010 21:37

Hi, mum of another 17 week old here - totally normal, my DD did this from 11pm-4am straight with short sleepy intervals for about the first two weeks.

It's exhausting but things will calm down - just sleep in the evening and day if you can, forget your chores, and feed feed feed - it will pay off and things will settle down. Congratulations, you are doing a great job!x

spiderlight · 06/05/2010 23:28

Congratulations! As others have said, they do this....it's a heck of a shock and it's exhausting, but she's getting your milk supply established. There'll be bouts of it leading up to growth spurts in the next couple of months as well, and a lot of babies cluster-feed for a couple of hours at a stretch in the evenings, but it's not always going to be like this, I promise! Once your milk is in, which should be any minute now, things will start to settle down.

Don't fret that it's to do with bringing her home - I had a home birth and my son slept beautifully for the first two days, to the point where I had to be reminded to pick him up and feed him - then the feeding frenzy started!!

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