Help! I am due to go back to work next month and my baby refuses the bottle - any advice?

[Pumpkin79]

Hello,

I am due to go back to work next month so I have been trying to get my baby on to formula fees during the day but she refuses to take the bottle and gets very distressed every time I try. (I have also tried getting my husband to do it when I am not there etc) She used to take a bottle every now and then but at 6 months decided she would not anymore. I am happy to keep breastfeeding at night/morning but what will she do whilst I am at work???

Any tips/advice would be much appreciated!

Thank you.

Honestly when your not there she will take a bottle it's very common for BF babies to do this if their mummy is near by but rarely do they continue if the bottle is the only option.

Have you tried going out a few hours around feeding time and see how she reacts?

Past 6 months she will be fine if she does miss the odd feed if she's now eating food.

I never managed to get DS onto a bottle at all before he started nursery -- he just was not interested. Eventually for the first few weeks he refused a bottle or sippy cup there while reverse cycling and breastfeeding more in the evening and at night, then gradually he started drinking from a sippy cup there, cut out the night feeds altogether and went to just two breastfeeds a day.

I spent the last month of my maternity leave thinking "oh, I must cut down" and stressed about the fact that he wouldn't take a bottle and how was everything going to work out when he started nursery, but actually it was all remarkably painless when we got to that point and I wish I hadn't worried so much and wasted so much time trying to persuade him to take a bottle rather than just enjoying the end of my maternity leave.

With DD I just didn't stress about it, didn't even try to get her onto a bottle/sippy cup (although did give her a sippy cup of water so she was used to the general concept) and she picked it up fine at nursery.

Hi Pumpkin, how old is your DD? I returned to work when my DD was 10 months old and she absolutely point blank refused any type of milk from any bottle or cup! Not even EBM...

She used to take a bottle of EBM when she was younger but then stopped even that.

It was absolutely fine though, she had a big feed in the morning and then when I got home and just before bedtime. I will admit that she was still having an 11pm feed at the time too, as it was the only way we could get her off nightfeeds and sleeping through until 6/7ish (we had been cosleeping until she could stand up in the sidecar cot). It was hard at first because she would jump on me as soon as she saw me, but she settled down really well.

She eats loads of cheese and yoghurt and has cow's milk with her cereal but she still won't drink it! She is now 19 months and we've had no problems. She gets enough calcium.

The nursery found it a bit strange and they did persevere with offering her formula or cow's milk for a few weeks, but then we all just gave up! She's perfectly happy and is still breastfeeding in the morning and before bed.

HTH.

DD is 7 months ATM and i am going back to work next month when she will be 8 months old

she doesn't take a bottle and i can't be bothered with the tears

so, i plan to feed her before i go and when i come home. PLus she has a feed at 10 pm ish which i won't drop for a while

if i am not around she won't breastfeed and won't be that bothered - she loves her food! She does leap on me when i return though so that is ok

in the day she has some water from a beaker - i will make sure her nanny gives her watery fruit and veg (melon, cucumber etc) as well as ice lollies and stuff when it gets warmer to make up for the lack of milk in the day

She is 10 months old now and it sounds like I am not the only one going through this, thank you so much for the advice I think I am going to stop worrying and enjoy the rest of the time I have with her. I will breastfeed her morning and night and see how it goes! Thanks again x

Hi Pumpkin, we went through exactly the same thing! I went back to work feeling so worried that my DD would not take the bottle / beaker, but amazingly she did. It took her a couple of weeks to get used to it, so we had lots of top ups of bf at bed time, but then she was well away. She was 13 months. The only problem we had was she didn't want the expressed bm from the nursery staff so she went on to cows' milk in the day. I still bf her on my days off and she handled the mix fine.
Good luck!
Actually it was a really lovely health visitor who told me to do exactly what you have said you are going to do:
"stop worrying and enjoy the rest of the time I have with her"

DD started nursery at 8 months and point blank refused all bottles from them, even though she took from her Dad, Nana, etc. After about a month (!) we gave up. She does take water from a sippy cup (peer pressure I think, because she just bangs it on the tray at home and laughs!)so she is getting fluids.

All seems to be fine, she has a few feeds between me getting home and bedtime, then she was initially waking at about 5am, so we fitted in a few more feeds while snoozing till I had to get up at 6.30. (Then teeth hit again and we're up all hours, but that's another story..!)

She started eating a lot more solids at nursery too, which filled the gap.

It's hard not to worry but really,if they are thirsty/hungry, they will take a bottle. And if they're not, they won't. Pookamoo's HV is right!(Not something I often say about HVs, actually!)

Pumpkin your post could have been written by me! DS2 was happy to take the occasional bottle until 2 weeks ago - he was ill with an ear infection and ever since has refused point blank. I'm also back at work in a month. So no advice but lots of sympathy!

It's really good to see these encouraging responses...my only concern is that he's going to start waking more in the night to catch up on milk. We've only just got to a point where he sleeps til about 3 or 4am, and last night he went through til 6 for the first time ever...

I've been worried about this as well. dd is 9mo and until last week refused pointblank to entertain a bottle (whether it contained bm or formula) then last week we had a breakthrough She suddenly started accepting one bottle a day. The only thing I did differently was to heat it up til it was hot (tip I got on here - bm is same as blood temperature which apparently is hot rather than tepid). That is the only thing I did differently and I don't know if that was the clincher or whether dd was just ready to take it.

Obviously it goes without saying that you need to test the tpr to make sure your baby doesn't burn her mouth - ! Good luck. I do feel for you as I honestly thought I would still be bf when she is 2 (which is fine for some - but not me).

My DS was the same, I went back to work when he was 10 months (now 18 months)and he has only ever had water at nursery (he is there 4 days a week). He likes food, but doesn't like formula or cows milk, and doesn't particularly like expressed milk and although they offer he consistently refuses. As long as he has plenty of water I am relaxed about it, and we still breastfeed at home.

Those of you who bfed as normal when you at home, have you had problems with engorgement when you are at work?
I'm thinking that I'll probably just feel full rather than exploding everywhere, but this was one reason why I wanted to get him onto at least 1 bottle a day before I went back, rather than leaving it to chance that he'll go for it when I'm away.
(Sorry for hijack Pumpkin - I am now thinking that I really was the OP!)

Another one with the same problem here, as I am also going back to work next month. DD is 5 months old and will only very occasionally take a bottle. It is encouraging to hear the stories of how it works itself out once people do go back to work, but I am under huge pressure from my CM to get her taking the bottle easily (and also to get her weaned, but that is a different thread).

I too was worrying about engorgement mamaduckbone. I only need to miss one feed and I am fit to burst, and I am in and out of the office all day at work and can't really bring a breast pump with me to express and relieve the pressure.

I was ok when I went back to work last time around. Felt a bit full but no leaking and not too uncomfortable. And at the weekend I went to a wedding. I didn't feed dd from 09.30 Sat to 7am Sunday and was ok - though admittedly it was a relief to feed her

I expressed at work for a couple of weeks but when we figured out that DD wouldn't take it from the bottles, I stopped my regular expressing and then only did it when I felt "full". Gradually the supply went down in the daytime. It seemed to be fine at night and on the days I was at home, I suppose having DD around made it stronger.

Now she has stopped bfing in the day even when I am at home (her choice) and will have a beaker of milk on the go during the morning and one at bedtime, then a cuddle and bf before she goes into her cot. I have adjusted to that without getting sore at all.

I never had many problems with engorgement, maybe a little discomfort in the first couple of weeks but it soon settled down.

I valiantly tried to express in the hopes that DD would eventually take a bottle but it was so hard to get any out (think I was a bit stressed about it) and she was never that interested, so I gave up.

It's amazing how your supply adapts. Some days she doesn't have much and then others she's more demanding and it's all fine!

(was jennylindinha by the way, just trying out an election namechange!)

Thanks - I really can't see myself expressing in the staff loos.
I'm going to try to be laid back about it...and cross the bridge of what on earth to do if / when I don't want to bfeed any more when I get to it.
My mum made me laugh the other day as she watched ds spit out the bottle. She's always been supportive of bfeeding, although in a fairly old fashioned way (thinks it should be 'private' and is a little when I feed in cafes etc - but she is nearly 78 so I'll let her off) She said "At the rate he's going he'll be one of these coming over and lifting your t-shirt up when he's 2" Yep mum, I can see that too...

I think your workplace are supposed to provide you with a place to express and store your milk! At least mine told me they are and they did. But it just wasn't happening...

Know what you mean about the 2 year old t-shirt lifting scenario, DD does that already and then blows raspberries on my boobs!

Cheeky girl

Yes your work are definitely encouraged to give you a private place to express. You are not expected to do it in the loo. How would you like your lunch to be prepared in there?

There is sadly no legal requirement though:

"You should let your employer know in writing if you are planning to breastfeed when you return to work. Ideally you should do this before you return so that your employer has time to plan.

Your employer must carry out a risk assessment to identify risks to you as a breastfeeding mother or to your baby. If there are risks they must do all that is reasonable to remove the risks or make alternative arrangements for you. Your employer must also provide suitable rest facilities.

Although there is no legal requirement, employers are encouraged to provide a private, healthy and safe environment for nursing mothers to express and store milk."

From here