Please talk to me about how long i should be going between feeds...

[BellaBalloon]

My gorgeous DS is 12 weeks old and coming out of a big growth spurt. Night feeds have decreased but sometimes during the day he can only go two hours. Max at any time during the day is about 3. i don't really care although I have had to feed him in some quite weird places, but have read that by 4 months he should be going 4 hours between feeds and that weaning might be trickier if I haven't spaced feeds out.

My question is, how on earth do you tell a baby he isn't hungry? He has always fed quickly and possets if he's had too much so not sure i would get more down him either.

is it anything worth being concerned about? should i be trying to make him go longer or can i just forget about it and go back to enjoying my maternity leave doing my own thang?

TIA

So 'shoulds" with babies - particularly bf ones. Feed him when he asks - he has no wnats that aren't also needs at this age.

Have fun - you haven't lived until you have fed a baby in the checkout queue at Tesco!

Relax and enjoy I don't think I've ever met a baby who goes 4 hours! Don't stress about weaning, things will have changed again by then anyway (plus all you do is throw food at them at meal times and keep feeding on demand).

Sorry - that should be "No shoulds....| obviously!

IGNORE what you read (unless the book was written abut your baby!) Sounds like you are doing a great job.

My mum kept looking at my DTs and saying "they should be going longer between feeds by now" and I replied "are you going to tell them, or shall I?"

They're over 7 months now, weaning at 6 months went great - they are so into their food, and now only on 4ish feeds a day.

Honestly, your baby knows what he's doing - keep listening to him and you won't go far wrong.

Congrats, by the way.

Carry on as you are, sounds like you have it fabulously under control!

Where did you hear that about the weaning, what a bizzare idea.

Seriously though, in another 3 months he will very likely have bigger gaps between feeds, although even if he doesn't I wouldn't worry. I have always found the 4 hour rule odd and potentially cruel, how often do you go that long without a drink?

The first month or so it is a bit hectic, I remember mornings being basically boob, breakfast ,boob again, more boob, oh it's time for lunch - but that soon passes.

Don't forget that as the weather gets warmer he will often be thirsty rather than actually hungry so may want a 'slurp' inbetween longers feeds.

Should have said 'the first month of weaning'.

Weaning might be trickier if feeds aren't spaced out? Eh?? Who wrote this book, are they a loon?

Actually it sounds like the kind of book that is going to recommend a very regimented and careful approach to weaning with one spoon of pear on day one and two spoons of carrot on day six, etc etc.

If you end up doing BLW you don't need to worry about milk feeds at all, I never really got the whole "replacing a milk feed with a solid feed" thing... then again that could explain why DS still fed about eight times a day at 16 months

What book could you possibly mean BB?

thanks so much for the speedy and lovely responses. i think the weaning point was that it is easier to start dropping feeds if you are on fewer??? i'm sure that it's great if your dc goes for ages in between feeds but isn't it all just down to their tummies and my our glands? my ds just feeds this way and i have yet to be persuaded that letting him scream would change that anyway. i don't get it.i don't get how anyone does anything other than demand feeding. not at this stage anyway...

Bella I pretty much demand fed until DS was about 15/16 months, and I suppose I still do to a degree. He is 21 months and only has BF morning and bedtime now, but during the day if he asks for milk in his cup or a banana or something then I give it to him.

I don't think the number of milk feeds began to drop until he was 8/9 months or so, but some of them became significantly shorter before that.

Now now BB - I thought we weren't allowed to insinuate THAT person was mad

it's not just her! - Tracy Hogg too!

I always think the best way to consider the whole feed spacing thing is, would you normally go 4 hours between food or drink ? You can go 4 hours, course you can, but I don't know any adult who chooses to - most rarely go two hours, and our stomachs are a lot bigger.

By not restricting milk, what you are doing is teaching your baby to self regulate their intake as they know that their needs will always be met. A great eating habit in later life

ah yes, sounds like the good old BW books -drove me demented at your stage - skip the dementia and feed your baby when he asks for it. it will settle down soon, the biggest change will probably come with the length of the feeds shortening before the frequency does.
Trust the process!