Screaming when feeding - help please

[FlightofFancy]

Sorry, know I keep posting with questions, but getting to wits end with this.

DS, 15 weeks, generally happy/healthy etc. But having some real feeding nightmares at the moment. He's always been a good feeder, quick and efficient, and has gained weight very well.

However, over the last couple of weeks he's started seeming really uncomfortable when feeding, lots of screaming and thrashing. In the last few days this has got much worse. Took him to Dr and she suggested reflux, and has given him infant gaviscon (we're giving it with a syringe as he's not great at taking a bottle). That's stopped the throwing up, but he's still fighting feeds. Not every time - during the night he'll feed well, and first thing in the morning, but mid-morning and all afternoon, he'll start feeding then pull away and start screaming and sobbing. He's giving me all the signs that he's still hungry - sucking his fist, my hand, my shoulder etc, but you'd think I was approaching him with a red hot poker, not my nipple. By the end of each feed (or when I give up), we're both in tears. Then of course he's hungry an hour later and we begin again.

I'm worried that he's getting a negative association with feeding, he seems to be catching up on feeding at night so I'm exhausted, I don't know if gaviscon is helping or making worse? I thought reflux was something from birth that got better over time not something that came on at 3 months?

I've tried feeding in more upright position - doesn't work. I've tried some of the Kellymom tips for strong let down (as I keep spraying him with milk), doesn't work. At a loss as to what I can do?

Of course, if I go to a feeding drop in clinic, he feeds perfectly and is lovely smiley baby... even though I don't do anything differently there.

Sorry about essay, thanks for reading. Am not loving him very much at the moment so very keen to fix this

My dd was doing this when her teeth came in I think it was rubbing on the sore gums. Any sign of teeth sorry no more advice just hope someone else has some for you.

maybe there's a build of wind which makes feeding uncomfortable by mid morning? I heard sometimes as babies get bigger they position themselves diffently when feeding. Keep trying different feeding positions and chairs etc.
Hope this helps

Thanks both - will keep trying! Any other advice/help welcomed - will try anything!

Hi Flightoffancy

I have 6 month old dd twins, When dt2 was about 3 months old she started doing exactly what you are describing (up until this she had been a brilliant feeder and was thriving) She would throw her head back and stiffen up her whole body and scream and cry but yet would still show all the signs of hunger, doctor put her on infant gaviscon but it didnt make any difference, she was then put on losec which for a while seemed to help but she ended up just as bad and then started to refuse all feeds, we were at our wits end at this stage , brought her to 5 different doctors until eventually one of them switched her meds from losec to zantec and literally over night we got our bubbly, happy playful daughter back, one month on and she is feeding better than ever. Really hope you get some answers soon
HTh

My DS did this too from about three months, not every feed but on and off for a couple of days or for a couple of feeds in a day.

Sometimes the problem was wind - I think I had a fast let-down too, and the wind could build up amazingly quickly. Sometimes it was a cold and maybe a sore head or blocked sinuses that make it uncomfy to change from upright to lying down. Sometimes he just seemed to get himself in a pickle so a cuddle for 5/10 mins would calm him down. Some days he would only lie on one side, so I would have to flip him over into the rugby hold to keep him feeding on the side we were on. Sometimes I never worked out what it was. It was mostly better if he was lying on a pillow on my lap (which made feeding out and about tricky and I basically gave up trying). I didn't find one simple answer, just had a selection of things that I would try, although wind was probably the most common reason. It did get VERY dull and on days when I was tired, TBH it was very annoying and frustrating and I would feel like I'd done 15 rounds by the end of a feed. Plus then his weight gain started to tail off, so there was pressure to feed him up despite how tricky it was sometimes.

I don't have a magic wand solution to tell you about, and never tried medical solutions because he always fed in the end. But you have my enormous sympathy. I just tried to take a deep breath and remind myself that DS was only little, not being naughty or difficult. If I managed to keep calm and not get wound up myself, that usually helped. Stopping trying to feed and having a cuddle often helped to calm us both down. Hope it gets easier and good luck

My DS had very similar symptoms and was also diagnosed with reflux. The losec he was prescribed didn't seem to help much.

What worked for us was expressing all the daytime feeds and bfing at night. This also helped to keep my milk supply up. For some reason he just found it easier to drink from a bottle (with a teat for an older age range - so when he was 3-6 months, we used a 6 month plus teat) in the daytime.

Good luck!

Thanks guys - always good to have some more things to try! Chestnut99, that sounds really familiar - as you say, sometimes it's just trying to find the right position.

Again, last night, it was like someone had flipped a switch at about 7pm, and suddenly he was feeding fine again. Fed all night (I stopped counting after the 3rd time!). I'm going to try today feeing little and often to see if that helps!

This sounds very familiar. My almost 6 week LO has never been a great feeder - although is gaining weight hand over fist. But over the last two weeks he has been crying and screaming a couple of minutes into feeds, combined with lots of wriggling and arching. And at the end of every feed - or when I had given up on the struggle an hour and a half later - he is still making hungry signs at me. At first this was just at his early evening feed, but now its almost at every one. He also refuses to nap in the day. He's a bit better at night - although wakes up every 45 minutes or so and falls asleep on the breast so I don't think takes much in.

Turkelton - sounds very much like you describe. My DH thinks I'm just trying to find problems that don't exists and am being neurotic, but something just doesn't feel right. I'm seeing my doctor for his 6 week check next week so am going to mention it then.

I'm finding the whole thing extremely stressful as I'm having to fight my LO every two hours or so to give him what I know he wants.

Oh and I've seen 3 lactation consultants. One who diagnosed slow let down, one who diagnosed fast let down and one who said he was just an efficient feeder and done after 2 or 3 minutes. None of those things feel quite right..

Such - this sounds awfully like reflux - the arching backwards is a classic sign. He is trying to stretch out his oesophagus poor thing, because there is acid burning him.

You need to go back to the gp, and get more than just gaviscon. You need to get something that reduces the production of acid in the stomach such as Losec or Xantac. This takes about 5 days to kick in but then there will be a big improvement.

Its important for you to understand more about reflux so is worthing looking it up. Just because he's not throwing up doesn't mean he hasn't got acid sloshing up and down. Gaviscon will only last a few hours. Poor thing. In the meantime you can make some immediate changes about how you handle him which will help.

1. He should never ever lie flat. Put a wedge under the top of his cot mattress so that he sleeps on a 45 degree angle. Also put phone directories under the feet of the head of the cot to help with this.
2. Do not lie him flat on the change mat either, put towels at the top of it to make a high pillow.
3. Minimal handling after a feed, don't move his tummy around and don't over-wind him. I use to wind the living daylights out of my dd (she had terrible reflux) thinking it was trapped wind and I was actually making the reflux worse. Gentle strokes up the back is what you do at most - kept upright for long enough and he will wind himself.
4. The worst - he must be kept upright 30 minutes after a feed. This is really tough in the middle of the night, but get comfy and let him fall back to sleep on your shoulder.
5. Tissue salts no. 10 - completely natural and totally safe for babies, this one is for heartburn.

Such - sorry you're having problems as well. It's so difficult isn't it when you know they want/need food, but they won't take it!

Rycie - thanks for that, and interestingly it helps me to think that my DS's issue isn't necessarily reflux, as he's completely happy lying flat - in fact, his changing mat is one of his favourite places (don't ask!). Also, his happiest position when he needs to calm down and is having tummy pain is lying on my lap with his head on my knees and his feet raised up by my chin - so from what I've read of reflux, that position should make it worse.

my DS was USELESS at this age during the day - he was simply more interested in doing whatever it was he wanted to do! He was also MUCH better at night . The more I tried to get him to feed, the more frustrated he would get!

this helped me work out what was happening

as did this

It does pass, and I have ended up feeding him when he is sleepy, before and after naps . This has not caused the inability to sleep on his own as many books would have you believe - in fact he self settles more and more - without crying! And he is happy to play in his cot when he wakes up . I also just tried to feed him whenever I could during the day to stop him waking at night so much and he snacked his way through a month or so . He would rarely sit still long enough for a double boob feed during the day!

I suppose the only way to tell is if he starts thrashing about just put him down doing something he likes. If he miraculously stops fussing about and is calm again then you know he doesn't want feeding, he just wants to play and explore! There's no point you both getting in a tizz.

He is now six months and I have to hold a toy next to my chin that he can look at so he will calm down enough to feed !

Hope this helps!

Thanks Ruby - yes, I think there's an element of that. I tried a stomach massage for colic/wind this evening and it really calmed him down, so think it might be that rather than reflux, and the vomiting is just a coincidence/tummy bug type thing.

I've gone for little and often today and I think he's been better - we'll see what tonight brings!