Did your baby start latching on much later??

[kindmuis]

Can anyone tell me if their babies started latching on later eg. from 3 months onwards? Or would you say after the first 3 weeks it just won't happen?
Thanks

DS1 only began to learn to latch on at about 4 weeks (born at 38 weeks).

I think many babies struggle to latch on in the first few weeks. I have no ide if many learn to latch on later - because frankly I think most mothers would have given up trying by that stage. Certainly premmie babies often learn to latch on at age 2-3 months - when they become big enough.

I don't think there is any reason why some babies would not learn to latch at 3 months - but it would probably take lots of calm and patience from the mother. Just like them learning any other new skill.

It took over 6 weeks for my dd to latch properly, so I'd say that the idea it won't happen after three weeks isn't correct. She wasn't positioning her tongue correctly, so although she was feeding it was hard work. The first 6 weeks were really difficult then suddenly she got the hang of it, and we carried on for 2 years, so we must have been doing something right!

My DS took about 2-3 months to get the hang of latching on properly. Just spent alot of time being patient with him, taking him on and off till he latched on properly and by 4 months he was an expert. 8 months now and still going strong It will happen some babies just take longer than others!! Wot is ur HV like? Mine was brilliant but I know some ppl have HVs that dont seem to be clued up on breasfeeding.
Hope everything works out, it will all be worth it

My DS1 didn't latch without nipple shields for the first 3 months. But I think this harmed my supply, and his growth rate. I kept trying without the shields from time to time, but he wasn't on for it.

And then at 3 months, all of a sudden it worked.

If you're having a hard time most HVs aren't really expert on BF - a BFC is a much much much better bet.

I had help from my (private) midwife, who was good, but a BFC would have been much better, I'm sure.

Thank you all soo much - it has really given me lots of hope! I keep on trying now and then - maybe I should try more. He ends up pinching my nipple when he does go on so I have been expressing and he has been feeding on the Habermann feeder (baby whisperer). I have tried a BFC and 5 times at a breast feeding clinic to no avail.

what do they say at the clinic, kindmuis? How any times are you putting him to the breast? Are you trying skin to skin and co-bathing...being gentle and patient with him, no shoving of heads!

They said his tongue doesn't come out far enough to take the nipple far back into the mouth. In the early days I tried puttin him to the breast nearly every day. Did the skin to skin and co-bathing as well. Not anymore though. I did a lot of shoving of head early on that is why I stoped as he was getting frustrated and so was I!

Thanks, kindmuis.

I honestly think it is important - essential, even - to give him the chance to take the breast many, many times every day, and to continue with skin to skin.

If you are no longer putting him in a position where he can make the move to latch on, he may not be able to maintain the ability to do so.

Sorry to be frank - but how will he learn without the chance to even try??

My daughter took a long time to latch properly - probably around 6 weeks when she started 'getting it'. She had a small mouth and a tiny 'wide open' gape - I did lots of exercises with her, getting her mouth to open up. It took a lot of time.

However, as Tik Tok said, she had to learn through feeding and I really believe it can take a baby hours and hours of feeding to develop the right technique - whatever people might tell you. I don't believe that she will suddenly 'get it' - it's like riding a bike, you just have to put a lot of practice into it.

DD was probably at the breast for about 8 hours a day.

dd never did latch on and i bf her using nipple shields till 8 months.

ds latched on at 4 months, used nipple shields again prior to this. bf him till 15 months old.

think it might have something to do with my enormous bosoms - too big for newborns mouth!

Hi Kindmuis,
Sorry to hear that you are having troubles. I have the same problem with my dd - she was 4 weeks before she breastfed, and 6 weeks before I could latch her by myself, without the help of the midwives at the bf clinic I go to. Even now (7 weeks) it is only very occasionally that I can latch her on - most of the time I have to pump and feed by bottle. We have taught dd to open her mouth wider and stick her tongue out by using the bottle as a reward - wait until she does the right thing, then put the bottle in quickly. It becomes an instinctive thing after a while - open wide and you get your lunch! We still have to work on getting her to keep suckling after she's in the right position, but that's another battle . The other thing we were told is to angle the teat up to the roof of her mouth, which is what she should be doing when breastfeeding. It has really worked for us.

The trick seems to be to keep trying - practice makes perfect. We try for a maximum of 5 minutes at the start of as many feeds as possible, and if she hasn't got it then we give a bottle, because it isn't good to have her get overhungry, frustrated and upset.

I hope that you get this sorted in time. How old is your ds? Pumping and feeding is hard work, and it does upset me when dd can't latch and gets upset. I find it helps to set myself little targets, and say that if there's been no improvement by (2 weeks' time) I'll start to wean her onto formula. I started by saying 4weeks old, then she latched first time, so I said 2 more weeks, then I managed to get her to latch by myself for the first time, so I've said 2 more weeks. Sometimes I think that it is only sheer bloodymindedness keeping me going! Ultimately I've given myself the aim of getting to 3 months - we go on holiday then and I don't want to spend the whole time pumping, so I've decided to scale back a bit then if she hasn't started feeding from me all the time. I can always pump to scale up again if she suddenly starts feeding later. I have decided that 3 months' exclusive breastmilk is very good going, however it is actually delivered, and although formula feeding is not what I'd have chosen by any means, at the end of the day a happy baby is more important. Try to get yourself some help from someone you really like and trust, and persevere for as long as is right for you. Good luck, and well done for keeping going so far!

kindmuis, have they checked your baby for tongue tie? Just a thought, with the whole tongue-not-going-out-far-enough thing.

NQC - good idea....deffo worth checking for.

tiktok - both mine have tongue tie! With DS1 it might have caused some nursing problems, not sure. With DS2, he's been feeding fine, so despite being diagnosed by my BFC friend, the GP and the HV, we've let it be. But he spends about half his day with his tongue sticking out, like he's stretching the tendon. Very weird. I just tell people he's hoping Kiss get back together.

I do know one mum whose BF problems were caused by tongue tie.

Will check if he has tongue tie. My DS is 3 months and such a happy baby. In the beginning we had to supplement with formula as I wasn't producing enough but now I seem to have enough for him.

I tried nipple shields for the 1st week and because he doesn't take it far enough he pinched me and he lost weight so we had to resort to expressing.

I'll keep on trying - it just really upsets me when he gets all upset - is it really worth it to force something on him if he has never been able to do it?

I think the best way to sort this, isn't to force him. Just to give him the opportunity. So, have a bath with him. Spend lots of time with both of you as naked as possible. You could even try hand-expressing a tiny bit, so milk is flowing out, so he can find it.

But I wouldn't force him, or push him, or let him go hungry, as that will just stress both of you. Don't see skin-to-skin as you trying to make him feed (and hence as a failure if he doesn't) but as a cuddly nice thing to do.

Congratulations on doing so well with the expressing, by the way! I always found expressing a hassle. To manage to keep your production up high enough to feed him exclusively EBM for so long is a real achievement.

NQC is right - no forcing or shoving or pushing, in fact with a baby who is already objecting, stop when the objections become more than a whine or a little whinge. They need to be lured back to the breast, and reminded that it is a lovely place to be.

I have seen many babies who have been turned off breastfeeding by heavy-handed 'persuasion' to the breast in the early days. Sometimes, babies arch their backs, refusing to go anywhere near. Sometimes, they promptly fall asleep. Either way, it's as if they are 'shutting down' because of all the head-pushing and messing about.

Hi Kindmuis,
I just wanted to offer a bit of encouragement, and (sorry to hijack your thread) shout to the world - WE DID IT!!! All of a sudden, dd has started taking the breast at every feed - she's only had one bottle since yesterday morning, and I think I gave in too easily then! No particular thing triggered it, I think it just clicked in her brain.

I think that the single most important thing we did was to take a deep breath and be as laid back about it as possible. Easier said than done, I know!!! But by not forcing her and just giving the bottle if she got upset, and having lots of skin to skin cuddles and offering the breast at as many feeds as I could (and if I felt too tired or stressed by the thought of it, I gave it a miss), I think we just worked through her fears and she came to realise that the direct route is best.

So please take heart, and good luck.

Oh, congratulations, JennyWren, I'm so glad it's working now! You really wanted it to work, and it's working!

(And it doesn't count as a hijack - you're answering the question, saying you've got your baby latching!)

JennyWren - Congrats with getting it to work!
I will once again try the skin-to-skin and see what happens. I tried him again and the problem we had since the word go is that it looks like he latches on and then pushes himself off. We did swadling to keep his little hands out of the way - but the head pulled off. He ALWAYS fell asleep so did a lot of undressing and changing nappy etc. I was in a birth centre for 6 days when he was born and everyday 2 midwifes and the assistants tried to get him on. When we left I did the breast shield thing for 2 weeks. I cried for 7 weeks following his birth due to the problems. I keep expressing every 3 hours and get up once at nite to keep the production going. Thanks for all the encouragement - really appreciate it!

Just seen this. My experience was pretty much the same as Jenny's (WELL DONE JENNY AND DD!!! ) - ds refused at most feeds at the beginning, I just kept offering the breast, but giving him a bottle (EBM or formula) if he got too upset, and at nearly 4 weeks he stopped refusing the breast - he's 11.3 weeks now and we've been exclusively bf since 4 weeks. I think he 'got it' when he got big and strong enough to deal with it (was 2 weeks early, jaundiced at the beginning and just over 6lbs).
Good luck! (p.s. sorry if there's been an update in a different thread that I've missed )

i did not realise it took that long!! my son wouldnt latch on and my midwife told me to give up. hes 7wks old now and too late to try again, i guess my milk wont come back now!!

You could get it back if you really wanted to jodie, although it would take a lot of patience and effort.