Extended Breastfeeding

[CastleInTheSky]

Hello Ladies,

my DD is 1 year old now, so I guess I am officially in extended breastfeeding territory. Not thought I would ever be here, but there you are.

I am trying to make up my mind whether I should wean my little one of the breast or give her a bit longer until she gives up by herself.

If I continue to bf, will my broken nights just continue indefinitely? My MIL thinks 6 months were too long, any smart reply for silly comments?

In other words, if you have been breastfeeding for longer than "normal", I would really love to hear your comments.

Morning Castle

I have no advice (DS only 4months old) but I'm really hoping to continue past a year (hopefully even 2 ) and am also getting constant comments from MIL and others. So.. would love to year what advice others have to give.

(Not hoping to hijack just wanted to let you know I'll be lurking )

I'm still breast feeding 20 month old. I never thought I'd make it to 6 months, never mind a year - but now I just cannot think of a good reason to stop. We both love it. It's good for her nutritionally. It's an instant fix and comfort whenever she's ill / upset / hurt herself. Where's the problem?

It's a myth that bottle fed babies sleep longer. My dd sleeps through most nights. In any case, when she does ask for milk in the night I simply haul her into bed with me and we're both back to sleep within 5 mins. (I actually kind of miss having our cuddles in the night when she doesn't wake!)

As to your MIL - just smile, smile, smile and ignore. None of her business.

Or you could quote to the cynics the WHO advice about exclusive breastfeeding for 6 months and then continued breastfeeding (alongside introduction of solids) for at least two years.

The best come-back I've seen on here is:

'How long are you going to go on feeding her for?'
'Oh, probably about five minutes.'

Re. broken nights - do you co-sleep? If so, you might find that she continues to wake for feeds for some time. I don't know what happens if you don't co-sleep as I've never pulled that one off.

I bf ds1 until 2 1/2 years old. At 12 months he was still waking up regularly through the night and I was on the verge of giving up, so I night weaned him soon after (at about 15 months iirc). It enabled me too keep going, with a morning an evening feed for a while, then with a bedtime feed only.

Needing to stop them bfing at night does not mean you have to stop feeding altogether.

As to busybodies who have opinions - I'm sometimes tempted to be rude, but I've found being utterly dismissive is the best approach. Of the kind 'He's still bfing? Answer: 'Yes, he's dreadfully spoilt, isn't he? (said with a smile). Usually leaves them speechless.

IMHO the night feeding is almost certainly habit, which can be broken!

We were co-sleeping most nights, until I realised that DS (now 7m) slept for much longer periods in his own bed (still in our room) - I think it was just comfort, and he was smelling the milk. We're being much stricter now and we're all happier, even DS! I do miss the night cuddles but we all sleep better.

Can't help on the comments - luckily I've made loads of friends who BF past a year and it's totally normal.

My dd birthday is on Friday, so we will be extended breastfeeder. As far as comments go about feeding for comfort, I said to someone "My daughter is teething, she has an ear infection, she needs all the comforting going"

We are having bad nights. Unfortunately, it goes with the territory of having a one year old child. Plenty of bottlefeed babies wake up.

There are two approaches you can take. You can either take a strict approach like MathsMadMummy advocates or make life as easy for yourself by co sleeping. There aren't any rights or wrongs, its a matter of what is best for you as a family.

Well my dd is three in a few weeks,and yes she does still wake at night to feed,and I'm still co-sleeping.She tends to only wake once now though on most nights.I am tired but as an older mother I suppose I am more aware how short this stage really is.I did intend to feed to over two as I fed DD1 until she chose to stop at two and a quarter,didn't think I would be feeding at three but I had an open mind about it.at the moment I am assuming I will stop at some point in the next year!

with us, BTW, all it took was a couple of nights of comforting him in his cot (shushing, stroking every few mins) and now if he wakes up he can settle himself. If we're absolutely convinced he's hungry then I give him one side and put him back in bed - seems like more effort at the time but it's worth it. he's such a happy chap when he wakes up in the morning now!

BTW it really helped when DH settled DS in the night, so he couldn't smell the milk and get upset.

I hope I don't come across as a mean mummy

My DD is 18 mo and still going strong! It feels like the longer I feed her, the more confident I get. I have had very few comments, most people are just curious IME (or maybe I'm just very thick-skinned!). If people ask when I am planning to stop I usually just smile and say that I hope to continue for at least another 6 months. I know that what I am doing is very good for her (and me) so sod what everyone else thinks. I still feed her in public too. Sarky comments are best reserved for strangers I think, better to be firm but polite with your MIL.

We still co-sleep and DD wakes up between 1 and 4 times a night. It's usually just once but she's got some more teeth coming at the moment and she's suffering, poor thing. Personally I don't think there's anything wrong with feeding for comfort.

You are doing well to be feeding at a year and you go on as long as you want to. And think of all the extra cake you can eat

We hit the 1 year mark on Sunday - didn't think I'd make 6 weeks let alone a year!

ProudMummyTiggaxx

Thanks for all your comments! It has been immensly reassuring and I will definitely give the just soothing her to sleep at night a go! Just hope my boobs won't explode in the mornings ;-)

I'm still bf my just turned 3 ds 3. I'm getting a bit fed up with it now tbh, but as long as he wants to keep going he can. It gives him immense comfort, not sure there's much milk left, he feeds to touch base so to speak. Your child's happiness is more important than other people's silly comments and ideas. Stick with it, if you're both happy.

I extended bfed 2 of my 3. One slept through from 6m. I gently weaned her off 2 of the daytime feeds at about 18m, and she self-weaned the rest by 2y. The other was waking more and more frequently until 18m, when I cracked and sleeptrained him. It took ages, but he has become a good sleeper and I continued feeding him until just after he turned 3, when I had to stop for medical reasons.

At 12m, broken nights are about sleep, not hunger. She is waking out of habit and you need to teach her to self-settle. This does not mean you have to leave her to cry. There are many ways to achieve the same objective. Controlled Crying, Pick-Up-Put-Down, Shush-Pat, No Cry Baby Sleep Solution are the best known - most others are variations on these.

I breastfed DS until 15 months, when he self-weaned. We'd night-weaned at six months which had worked really well, and he'd still fed really enthusiastically until he was a year. We gave him more cow's milk in the day then and eventually he just lost interest in my milk.

He's almost 18 months now and I don't think he even remembers it.

I BF DD for 2 and half years and got nothing but snide comments for the trouble! She's 7 now but people still talk about it as if it was the strangest thing they've ever heard! My SIL was the worst, insisting I gave DD water to drink even though I explained the breast provides everything the babes need. I even caught her trying to give DD tap water on one occasion. She also had a very strange notion that cows milk would somehow be better for DD than my own milk and kept on trying to convince me to make up formula feed with crushed rusks in every time she cried. After about 12 months everyone would ask when I'm going to stop feeding her, with puzzlement on their faces. I just used to say I'll stop when she no longer wants the milk and I also got fed up of explaining to people that producing milk is what breasts are for. I'd do it all again but next time I'll just walk around with a baseball bat handy to deal with all the silly questions/suggestions

I Bf until almost 2 with my first.
it was wonderful in so many ways.

we night weaned at 15 months using jay gordons method which was fine, and also some no-cry sleep solution. google - jay gordon - breaking pattern in family bed for ideas.

Just googled Jay Gordon night weaning - sounds like a very sensible approach, will try & let you know how I get on. Thanks for the suggestion, never heard of him before. We don't sleep in a family bed, but I don't see why that should affect the method.

DS (23 months) still bf at bedtime and sometimes on waking.
Until about a month ago he was waking once during the night and bf to settle. I was reluctant to do 'sleep training' and he has started to sleep through consistently over the last 4 weeks of his own accord. I have limited his daytime nap to no more than 1 and half hours (he could previously sleep for 3+ hours) and think that has made the difference.

I just smile and say 'Yes' if anyone asks if I'm still bf Ds and haven't had to deal with anything more than a subtly raised eyebrow.

I tried using the WHO recommendations argument yesterday and was assertively informed that the two year recommendation is only because of countries in the world where the water supply isn't good, so breastfeeding is safer, but it doesn't count in countries like the UK. Grrrrrrr. Back to 'because DS and I bloody want to' then!