Baby only 48 hours old and I'm in immense pain

[Kekke]

I am a first time Mum with a 2 day old daughter. She was born by emcs so was very sleepy for the first 24 hours. I managed to start feeding her yesterday and have managed 5 feeds so far, but each time is becoming more painful and the last one ended with us both in tears.

My nipples already look like they have blisters on - what am I doing wrong? And is it normal to be very painful for the first minute or so, is this 'let down'?

The problem is I am in Romania and here most people just FF so I am not getting any support from the hospital staff, they just look at me crying and offer me a bottle. I tried in the last feed to use a nipple shield and managed to DD for 10 mins before thinking my nipple would fall off. She does latch on quite well I think and take in a lot of my breast, but obviously something is not right.

Am I just being soft? I feel like I am failing my daughter already. Do you think it would be OK to alternate between a FF and a BF?

Any advice will be much appreciated.

IME intense pain is a sign of a bad latch. Sorry you have no support, it's hard to replace someone actually seeing what's going on. Try checking that the lower lip is properly everted (not tucked in) - that's what makes the biggest difference to me.

If you are already getting sores, use lansinoh after every feed - really helps.

Sorry to be short, bfing 6 day old ds2 right now.

Hi, I am no expert..hopefully one will be along in a minute- just wanted to share my experience. I have fed my 3 dc (dc3 only 4 weeks old) and with each one the first week of feeding has been very painful. I got blisters on both nipples, and like you shed a few tears during some feeds. For me this seemed normal- latch was fine and baby was getting plenty of milk.

I really hope someone will corretc me if I am wrong and if this amount of pain is signalling that something is wrong- just wanted to tell you that I went through the same and after the first week the blisters completely healed and feeding is now an absolute pleasure. Good luck xx

Kekke, congratulations on the birth of your daughter !

I suspect you are going to get lots of responses to your post.
You are NOT failing your daughter, you are doing an amazing thing to BF under difficult circumstances, so be proud, not despondent!

No, BFing should not be sore. If is most likely that her latch is too shallow, ie she chomps on your nipple rather than breast. I was once told "It is called breastfeeding, not nipplefeeding, for a reason" and that is so true.

Have her lying tummy-to-mummy, either in a cradle hold or cross cradle hold; I find this more comfortable: you basically hold the baby's head with the hand on the other side of the breast you are using. She should latch on with a wide-open mouth, both lips kind of curled back, so it gives a 'fish mouth' appearance when she is on, she should take a good chunk of breast, more of the lower half or the aureaola than the upper part.

Look at these websites if you have the time, they have helped me A Lot. Dr Jack Newman has lots of videos that show you what a good latch/effective drinking looks like.

Initial latch-on should not be painful for more than the firts 2 or 3 sucks, if at all.

If you ask my opinion I would NOT add FF to the mixture at this point as it is v likely to interfere with your supply. Having said that, do what you have to, to survive .
A LLL leader once said to me "BFing is 10% technique and 90% confidence" and this is v true. Your body can do this, it is v early days, your milk has not come in yet, baby will want to and should BF v frequently at the moment.

Kellymom - evidence based BFing advice. Look at 'getting started'.

Dr Jack Newman - look at 'videos' and 'Bfing help'

V best of luck. You are doing great. Keep going. Can you get Lansiloh (sp?) nipple cream or an alternative?

Oh, and lastly, you are NOT failing. This is the v hardest of times, it will get better.

Oh, and in an environment that is ignorant not used to BFing you will get a lot of dross comments:
you cannot 'spoil' a tiny newborn. Feed her everytime she fusses, you will both learn how to do it, it will be less stressful than having an unhappy baby all the time and it will help your milk supply.

My advice, only ever listen to those who say nice/supportive things and IGNORE anybody else, no matter how 'qualified' they might be (I am saying this as a GP btw).
My mother was told she had 'no milk' a few hours after having given birth - what nonsense, of course there was no milk, it will take 2-4 days for the milk to come in. Colostrum is barely a few drops but is 'liquid gold' in terms of nutrition and immunity.

Reasons to be proud - read this everytime you are tempted to throw in the towel . Even if you stopped now, you'd be right to be proud of yourself.

HTH a bit.

Thanks so much for your replies, I will look at the video links now. I think it must be her latch that is wrong. I have big boobs and find it difficult to see exactly what she has in her mouth! It's just odd that the first few feeds seemed to go really well and weren't painful, but now it's just awful.

My Mum is arriving from the UK tomorrow and is bringing me Lansinoh as someone recommended it to me earlier.

Will have another go with the shields in the next feed and try to avoid FF tonight and hopefully work on her latch.

Yep, big norks here too . Seriously, try cross cradle hold, at least initially as it is much easier to see what you are doing.

I also found if helpful in the past to not look beyond the next feed or the current day... and before you know it weeks have passed . I know that is hard to believe just now.

Hope your mum will be supportive and helpful to you.

well done and congrats...
i have large bosoms too and found lying down on my side easier for feed, it just seemd to take the pressure of in the early days. if you think your latch is ok after watching the videos , i have to say that i found feeding ds incredibly painful for the first 2 weeks at least (compounded by mastitis and thrush tho)
your bosoms arent used to this but will be soon. Take each feed at a time and feel very proud of yourself

`The Lansinoh is fantastic. Use it before and after each feed.

I am not an expert but I am currently bf my third and I also have big boobs.

Sometimes it can help to hold your breast and sort of squeeze your nipple area into a smaller shape so the baby can latch easier.

I soemtimes found it easier to get a good latch in the early days using a rugby ball hold. Hold the baby under your arm with her head pointing at your nipple and feet dticking out behind you.

I also find it much easier to feed using a pillow to rest the baby (and my arm) on.

With large boobs I have always found it very difficult to feed lying down.

Can you get your partner or a friend, mum when she gets there to watch the vids as they may be able to see better what her latch is like.
Also reccomend lying down.
congrats on the birth of your daughter

Just wanted to add that squeezing out some colostrum then dabbing it back over your nipples is the fastest way to heal them IMO.

A midwife gave me this tip and it worked a treat - my LO was 3 days old an had re-opened a previous split in one nipple and blisred the other but doing this with the colostrum/milk when it came in healed me really fast.

Good luck!

p.s. this might help?:

www.askamum.co.uk/Listen-and-watch/Search-Results/Video-tips/Video-Latching-on/

You have had some great advice already, so I'll just add...

1. Keep trying difference feeding positions. Different holds work best for different people. I settled on the under arm rugby ball hold with my big breasts, it seemed easier for me.

1. Biological nurturing is a nice way to bond with your baby and by letting your baby latch herself on, she is more likely to get a deeper better painless latch. You can do this for every feed if you wish.

All the best

you sound like you're doing a fab job already. what worked for me was just lying down with my top off and lying her down next to me at nipple to nose height and just cuddling her- no pressure and she'd latch on fine

Also - if you end up having to resort to giving her a bottle of expressed milk or formula- it doesn't mean the end of bfeeding.

Big congrats on the birth of your baby girl. You poor thing with the sore nipples there is notthing worse and notthing prepares you for the pain. The most amazing present I was given when I was Breastfeeding was a set of silver cups they were my life saver and the only reason I continued to breast feed I honestly would have given up without them. I got them from an Italian friend of mine as they are widely used in Italy and not really known about in the UK not sure why cos they are amazing. I subsquently bought sets for all of my friends and they also found them brilliant. The website is www.breastangels.co.uk
The best of luck and I hope the nipples get better. x

How are things going today?
Hope your mum arrived safely.

I just wanted to come back to this and thank everyone for the great advice. Things are not going great on the bf front as am now suffering with bleeding nipples. The good thing now is that I have a breast pump and am expressing a little to try and keep up a supply. The milk that comes out has quite a lot of blood in it, but after doing research online I understand this isn't really a problem for the baby.

DD is being topped up with formula as she has lost 10% of her body weight (which I understand is fine), but her wet nappies were red which the nurses told me was a sign of dehydration so I felt there was no option but to give her something to drink.

I am now hoping to mix feed and after having a cry about it, I've come to the conclusion better to do that and enjoy the first month of DD's life (I think she'll be our only one) than beat myself up about it and miss out on this time. I hope that by tomorrow my nipples will have healed over enough that she can try feeding from me again and then I can top her up with expressed milk if it becomes too painful.

My lovely Mum arrived safely thanks PacificDogwood - with Lansinoh in hand!

Glad to hear you are doing okay. Good attitude to have, at the end of the day it is about doing what works for you and your family. Happy mummy = happy baby.

Glad your mum arrived safely.

Hi Kekke

Sorry to hear things are still tricky but glad to hear you're sticking with the BF - mixed feeding sounds like a great plan. raindrop's right that a happy mum = a happy baby

Just on the red nappies front, not sure if it's the same thing but my DS had quite a few red nappies in his first week and all the midwives said it was just hormonal - my hormones coming out of his system - and are perfectly normal. No one mentioned dehydration to me.

I also had bleeding nipples in the first week (kind of a rusty pipes syndrome thing) and lansinoh definitely helped! It does get easier - just over one week ago I really thought I'd quit BFing but now (on day 25) we're still going strong.

Good luck with things and enjoying showing off your DD to your mum

PS also wanted to add that my DS was born by EMCS and we only managed a couple of feeds in the first 24 hours - again, I was told it was perfectly normal as c-section babies have more fluid so aren't as hungry for the first couple of days.

i had blisters on one nipple - it cleared up by about day 3 or 4. rub breast milk into it - it is supposed to help.

I found breastfeeding very sore for the first two weeks and was checked to make sure my DS was latched on properly which he was. I used lanolin which can stay on while the baby feeds and is fabulous!! slather it on! I also used to rub the milk from the feed over them as apparently it helps promote natural healing.

It does get better I promise, you will achieve pain free bf! hold on in there.

Tummy to tummy, chin to breast, nose to nipple. Looking up at the nipple and move the babies head to your nipple. Big wide open mouth first with the nipple very far back in the mouth.

x

Kekke, congratulations on your new arrival and sorry to hear about your difficult start with your breastfeeding relationship. There is some good advice been given here already but I thought I'd just add a bit of my own too.

The most important thing to rule out is Tongue tie. Sometimes no matter how good your technique some babies that have a Tongue tie will really struggle to latch well and it can cause a great deal of pain.

Great to hear that you are expressing, keep up the good work.

I'd second the advice about the rugby position as it can give you a slightly better view when you have larger breasts. A technique called the deep latch technique can be helpful if you have a baby that is struggling to fix.

www.pumpstation.com/pumpstation/dept.asp?dept_id=3228

Good luck, let us know how you are doing.

For some women breastfeeding hurts immensely but gets better with practice BUT for others it gets worse! Split nipples are no joke.

Keep it up for as long as you want & do try to get some advice on getting a good latch. It doesn't happen for everyone though. I breast feed for nearly two weeks and was so sore and so unsuccessful at latching on that it was simply not sustainable to keep it up. I felt totally defeated because I thought I should be able to breast feed easily!

The problem is if you listen to everyone telling you that it will get better & it doesn't - you're going to feel like a failure though you definitely aren't.

If it comes to that - formula feeding is not the end of the world. Millions of babies are formula fed and they are perfectly fine. The 'breast is best' brigade may mean well, but they are also responsible for a lot of guilt and disappointment in mothers for whom it does not work out.

Keep an open mind & best of luck with whatever you choose to do.

Great advice here already. Thought I'd add my tale to fuel the encouragement fire further...

My ds was only 5 days old when my nipple split, so painful! He then coughed up blood which was from me when he was feeding. I used the Lansinoh cream religiously and also breast milk dabbed on after every feed worked wonders, it really does have magic powers!

At 3 weeks I was crying at every feed and ready to give up. I starting giving a ff to break up the cluster feed in the evening which he played with and hardly took at all but it gave me a break and some time to recover between feeds. This then moved to a bottle feed of ebm which he again played with. This lasted about four weeks as he gradually refused the bottle altogether.

I continued to feed him for all other feeds and napped as much as I could to aid healing. Don't underestimate the power of sleep to heal those nipples! After a couple of days of having a break from the endless evening feed I healed completely and started enjoying feeding.

He is now 4 and a half months and doing really well, as am I! I'm so glad I ignored advice and went with my instincts. I needed a break and by doing what I did, only in the evening when I was most tired, my body had time to heal and I could get on with bfing exclusively.

You're doing brilliantly. Check for tongue tie, check your latch, rub in cream, rub in milk, find different comfortable positions, and keep going. If at any time you feel able to go back to exclusively bfing just do it. Enjoy your babe. Xxx

Hi, Kekke, lovely to read your last post and you sounding so positive!

Silverette nipple cups really help healing; they are not nipple shields (which can interfere with breast feeding) and you wear them between feeds. Here is more information about them. Maybe you can order them on-line??

Re mix-feeding: I mixfed DSs1 and 2, and to a much lesser extent DS3. It can certainly be done, and if you need a break, giving the odd bottle of formula is A Good Thing.
However, be aware that babies get wise to the fact that milk flows faster/more easily out of a teat and mix-feeding can be a slippery slope to more and more FF and less BFing. This is what happened to me and DS1. If you want to continue BFing to some extent (or maybe one day exclusively again, who knows? ) just be aware of it, give FF at different times of day everyday, try expressing to keep your supply up/increase supply (I found expressing much less sore than initial latching on) and persevere.

FWIW, it took me to DS4 (1 month old) to feel that I have the hang of this BFing lark - and even having said that, I had a major wobble last week, not trusting my supply and worrying he wasn't gaining enough weight.

REally, best advice I can give you is to second Adamsmam's last paragraph . If you have the chance just go with the flow and when you are more comfortable just feed, feed, feed as much as your baby wants to.