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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

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Original poster

New to bf and struggling. Would love some advice

27 replies

Josie22 · 26/03/2010 17:13

Have a 6 day old and trying to bf but am struggling. She had regained her birth rate at the 5 day check which means she is getting enough milk which is great. Midwife watched me latch on and said that it looks right but I am not so sure. The problem seems to be me. Have such sore nipples and every time I feed it just gets me down. I have read/googled/watched every video on this over the last few days and I am pretty sure I know what I am doing wrong but I can't seem to fix it. I just can't seem to get enough nipple in her mouth so it is rubbing - doesn't matter how much I try. Have tried different positions and dh has even helped me to push her on when her mouth is open the fullest but could it just be that her mouth just isn't big enough or my nipple isn't long enough? feeling very tearful and not sure what to do next. Have spoken to breast feeding helpline but they couldn't really tell me anything I didn't know. Any help or advice would be very gratefully received.

OP posts:

fruitshootsandheaves · 26/03/2010 17:19

relax and try to stop worrying it sounds like you are doing great.
It always hurts for a while, even if your baby has the best latch in the world. Think about it, doing something new every few hours every day is bound to make you sore.
I was sore for a couple of weeks with every one of my DC's.
Keep going it will get easier.

smallwhitecat · 26/03/2010 17:19

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UnrequitedSkink · 26/03/2010 17:22

It does sting like mad for about 2 weeks - I remember that toe curling agony! (God, am going to do it again shortly - must be insane). You're obviously doing something right, she's gaining weight. Kamillosan ointment helped me a little. And then one day it magically doesn't hurt anymore. Relax - you're doing a great job.

smallwhitecat · 26/03/2010 17:22

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smallwhitecat · 26/03/2010 17:24

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cleanandclothed · 26/03/2010 17:26

Congratulations on the new baby and her weight gain which is great. At the start breastfeeding is exhausting and you never seem to get enough 'in between time' to recover. I presume you have a soothing cream (kamilosan or lansinoh or similar)? Is it sore during the feed or in between feeds? If it is sore during the feed, is it for the whole feed or just at the start? Do you have any blisters or bleeding?

There is (imo) an element of 'it takes a bit of time to get used to it and it will get better' and an element of 'with a good latch it shouldn't hurt', and you need to get as much help as you can whilst not stressing too much!

Keeping this active so you get more advice.

Original poster

Josie22 · 26/03/2010 17:29

Thank you all for your replies - this is why mumsnet is so great as just knowing that other people have gone through this too has helped! I just feel so confused by it all as there is so much conflicting advice and nearly everything I read says it shouldn't hurt if you are doing it properly. Will try and relax but have a mountain of hormones trying to stress me out. Am using lansinol which eases the soreness. Will look into the biological nurturing too - we went through this with Nct but that was about 6 weeks ago and pregnancy hormones seem to have wiped most of it from my memory.

OP posts:

MamaGoblin · 26/03/2010 17:30

Second what smallwhitecat said about biological attachment (letting her lie across you and find the nipple). The skin-to-skin is nice for you both, too!

Not sure I agree that 'it always hurts' - yes, it can be painful or tender for some people at first, but this isn't a given. If it still is very painful after the weekend, please seek out some support from a local breastfeeding counsellor - if you ring the NCT helpline, they'll be able to let you know your nearest one, as well as talk you through your concerns and problems: 0300 330 0771.

AnnieLobeseder · 26/03/2010 17:35

How are your nipples? Is the skin OK or blistering/raw? Does it hurt for the whole feed or just the initial latch/let-down?

If the skin is damaged and it hurts for the whole feed, then perhaps the latch needs some work. Without seeing you, can't really advise on how to fix it!

However, if the skin is mostly fine and the pain goes away once he's feeding, then it's probably just the initial OUCH bit of bf-ing, which is sucky and toe-curling but suddenly goes away all on its own. If it helps, I didn't have this pain with DD2, so hopefully you'll only have to put up with it this once, and not for much longer.

Good luck!

BertieBotts · 26/03/2010 17:37

It does sound to me like the latch could be wrong. Definitely try the biological nurturing.

WRT pain - if your nipples are sore already then it is going to hurt when you feed, however, if your DD is latched correctly it should be minimal once she is latched. I was always told to count to 10-15 sucks at the start of a feed and if it still hurt after this, then you should take them off and start again. Often women are told to take the baby off as soon as it hurts, but if you keep taking them off and on, it is going to make it worse - best to see if it settles down first. But pain throughout a feed is not normal and you shouldn't have to struggle through.

Can you get anyone else to have a look at the latch? Has your baby been checked for tongue tie at all? It's unlikely there is anything wrong with your nipples but tongue tie can be a cause of bad latch in babies and it's easily treatable.

NotSoRampantRabbit · 26/03/2010 17:37

Oh it's just dreadful when it hurts like that. I well remember the dread when DS woke to feed. I was so tense and upset because I so wanted to enjoy it.

With DS I gritted my teeth and got on with it. Lots of lanisoh and grim determination.

With DD I refused to be in pain so did some googling and found the website smallwhitecat referred to. Straight away feeding was easier, and within two days the lovely scab on my right nipple was a distant memory and feeding was pain free.

Failing that, get someone out to watch you feed. All the telephone advise in the world can't beat a total stranger staring intently at your bosom for an hour or so.

Hope you sort it out. You have my sympathies. You're doing brilliantly though - great weight gain and you have got it together to seek help.

Oh and finally just tell yourself you'll do the next feed. Don't look too far ahead.

hellymelly · 26/03/2010 17:42

she must be doing well going by her weight.It is sore feeding at the beginning but if your latch is really wrong or there are probs like a tongue tie or thrush then it is really agonising.I would give it a bit longer before assuming there is a problem as it sounds as though it is just your nipples getting used to feeding,really ,one day it just doesn't hurt at all and it is the easiest thing in the world.If it continues to hurt pay to see a lactation consultant.I had completely mixed advice from midwives but the lactation consultant was brilliant and I have been feeding for five and a quarter years solid now (one baby and then the next).Congratulations on your baby!

NumptyMum · 26/03/2010 17:46

I remember it hurting a lot at first too - I think latch is possibly issue (esp if you think so too) but possibly it's also just your body adjusting to doing something it's never had to do before.

It's now a while since I bf (stopped when DS was just over 2 about 6 months ago) but I think what worked for me was to gently squeeze breast between fingers (to get something I could grip/push in) and stroke nipple down his top lip; he would then tip his head back and open mouth and I would shove as much in as I could, nipple pointing towards the roof of his mouth. I'm not sure if this description makes sense - hopefully there are good videos you could watch if you search on google or youtube?

Hang in there - you are doing really well .

NumptyMum · 26/03/2010 17:48

Another thing I found really useful was to go along to a breastfeeding support group where I could get someone in person advising on my position/latch - have you any groups you could go to in your area? Otherwise I think you can people from La Leche League or NCT who can come and visit to advise (foc, I think).

LoveBeingAMummy · 26/03/2010 17:54

Hi Josie

Congrats on the baby and on being so determined to bf. Once you are sore it can take a few days to get better even if you have 'corrected' anything that needed corecting. Can you get a BF cafe/advisor? I had one patch where it was hurting so much and carried on for ages that it got to the point i almost quit bf. Nothing new to advise i'm afraid, I found going back to loking at latch pictures and taking her off until she was on properly worked. Oh and loads of cream. I also found that the paper breast pads seemed to add to it for me and the washable ones were great for me. Hope it gets better soon.

juicy12 · 26/03/2010 17:58

Hi, Josie. Congratulations!! I went to a breastfeeding clinic with both my DC, which was really helpful. TBH it took about 6 weeks for BFeeding to click with both of them and then after that it was plain sailing. With me it was all about the "latch" and they were both nipple feeding as opposed to breast feeding. Lots of cream is essential!

InmyheadIminParis · 26/03/2010 17:58

Hiy and Congratulations!
It sounds as though you're doing a great job, but if you're think that the latch is okay, but that it's still sore, there is something wonderful that you can buy to help. They're clear silicon nipples, which fit right over your nipples. They're easy for the baby to latch on to, reduce the pain to you completely and allow you to keep bf-ing comfortably while you and your baby get used to the mechanics of the whole thing, and while your nipples - erm - toughen up a bit.
Keep going - you're doing great, but do try the silicon thingies. They really do work.

MathsMadMummy · 26/03/2010 18:02

I think it can hurt no matter what really, with my DS all it took was one bad latch to make me sore for days after! I was crying at every feed.

I found LANSINOH cream really useful - expensive but a little goes a long way.

It will get better - in a few weeks you won't believe you ever had any trouble! Glad your DH is helping too.

ChristianaTheSeventh · 26/03/2010 18:05

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BertieBotts · 26/03/2010 18:52

The nipple shields are good as a last resort, but I wouldn't go for them first because they can create more problems than they solve. Try the biological nurturing first and then maybe give them a try if you can't see anyone until after the weekend and you are really finding it hard to cope.

twosofar · 26/03/2010 19:16

It does sound as if the latch isn't quite right. When my DS1 got it wrong the pain was intolerable so I can't sympathise enough and the more you do it the more you feel like you are rubbing salt in a wound. I second Kamillosan & Lansinoh though.

The best advice anyone gave me re latch is that the baby's mouth should look the the K of Special K! I hadn't a clue what I was doing but as soon as I saw the Special K mouth it all started to get better!

Congratulations on your baby...don't give up, it sounds like you are doing a fab job

spiderlight · 26/03/2010 19:54

Does the pain last the whole feed or is it worse at the beginning? The tissue behind the nipple has to stretch quite a bit at first - I think it took about ten days or a fortnight before this stretching pain stopped for me, and it literally was toe-curling. Your skin will inevitably be sore at first as it adjusts, as well. It does get better, honestly, and stretching pain doesn't necessarily mean that you're doing anything wrong. Hang in there.

Congratulations on your new arrival!

dizzyem · 26/03/2010 20:14

Lots of great advice has been posted but are you using Lansinoh cream - this helps with sore nipples. also see if you can find your local Baby Cafe or contact your local children's centre. I got hung up about my latch with my second daughter as my nipples were sore but it did turn out I had thrush in one. The breastfeeding network site is also a very useful source of info. Hope you manage to resolve your issues.

Original poster

Josie22 · 26/03/2010 23:05

Thank you again for all your advice. It hurts initially the most and then eases but doesn't go, if the pain stays constant then I have to take her off and try again. The nipples seem to be almost shedding skin as in places the skin seems to be coming away as though she has been pulling more in one place so I guess it is the latch/position but I just can't seem to get more of my nipple in her mouth. It's a shame there isn't a way of practicing before the baby arrives because with all the hormones racing through my body right now I don't feel too logical either. I am determined to keep going though. I am going to look up the nurturing website too and I am sure there must be a group nearby where I can go and get some advice. I like the tip about the Special K - something to look out for at 3am at least! Hopefully tonight's feeds will go better than last nights/today's.

OP posts:

BertieBotts · 27/03/2010 07:59

Hi Josie - has your baby been checked for tongue tie?

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