Extended bfers -am I doing the right thing?

[Besom]

I have cancelled an operation I was supposed to be having because I found out that part of the medication I would have to take would stop me being able to bf dd for 2 days.

I don't absolutely have to have this op - it would save me some pain and discomfort.

DD is 22 months and obviously she could physically manage for 2 days without, but she feeds often (still day and night at the moment). I think that a 2 day stoppage would be a lot for her to cope with and she wouldn't be able to understand why I was there but not feeding her. Also, not sure I can cope with hysterics from her post op as DH would have to go back to work the following day and would not be there to try to distract her.

I think the medics and my family (except dh) think i'm being a bit mad/over protective.

What do you think?

Good luck Besom, I hope they find another solution for you - please take v good care of yourself.

If it does end up being necessary to stop for a day or so, do say if you would like any suggestions for coping, as I can give you some strategies that worked for us and I'm sure others will have tips.

An hour of screaming is not ideal at the best of times.

Sorry about your situation, Besom. It is difficult to explain to a toddler why, suddenly, they can't have mummy's milk.

If this is misprostil we're talking about, isn't that one of the drugs commonly used to induce labour? And after labour, women breastfeed?

Just another line of enquiry for you. Good luck!

That's what I thought myself laura which is why I only mentioned it yesterday to them.

I think it's probably a balance of risks thing - if it was completely necessary to use it then they probably would not hesitate. But because it isn't necessary they're covering themselves.

Theyoungvisitor - I would like those tips anyway please, because even if I don't have this operation I plan to night wean some time soon, when all this has settled down.

well it's not rocket science but here's how we did it...

short term when I had to be out for bedtime for some reason, the only thing that worked/works was for me to go out and the child to see me go out - wave goodbye from the window, watch me go down the street etc.

If they had even a suspicion that I was in the house, it never worked - they would just scream until I came.

Dh would then try to put them down, they'd often refuse, but he didn't let them scream for too long (I think that's counterproductive as the child gets inconsolable). Instead if it wasn't working he'd get them up, take them out of the bedroom, they'd have half an hour more quiet cuddles and play, and try again. Repeat if necessary but almost always worked on the second try.

In your situation I guess you'd have to go for a drive or a walk if need be, but you could creep back once they were asleep.

Actual true night-weaning took much longer (and we haven't done it yet with DS2 who is only 16 months) but what we did with DS1 was first to get hm used to DH putting him down, so I'd always call DH after the final feed and DH would be the one to physically put him in his cot. Then we tried to break the association with feeding and sleep - so we moved stories and toothbrushing to after the bedtime feed, and again, DH would put him in his cot.

When that had become routine, we started getting DH to go down every time DS woke, and trying to get him back to sleep. It didn't always work and if it didn't, I'd go down and feed. I know some people prefer to do a clean break, but I felt DS wouldn't understand that, and this way was gentler for all of us.

Eventually DS got more and more willing to settle for DH, and finally it got to the stage where I could go down and settle him without a feed. The whole process took about 6 months and he was nightweaned by about 26 months I think.

He still fed morning and evening for quite a long time after that but at about 28 months I went away for a full weekend and DH had no trouble and I didn't need to pump or have any discomfort. We just resumed quite happily when I got back.

Hope that helps - none of it's very original but it did work and it felt quite natural and not too distressing for any of us.

sorry, just re-reading my post back and "it's not rocket science" sounds a bit dismissive and rude!

I just meant I don't think I personally have any startling insights to give - though I wish I did - but perhaps you might find some of the ideas useful.

I really hope all turns out well for you with the op. Hopefully they will conclude that the pessary is not a problem - it does seem a bit odd that it would be.

Sorry to hear about your situation, Besom. I don't think I can add anything to what the others have said, but for what it's worth, when I had an ERPC, I had a pessary and it didn't even bloody work! So presumably could have done without it, as they managed to do what they had to do.