Right I need your best retorts to

[BunnyLebowski]

the inevitable 'Oh isn't it time she was off that?' questions.

DD (18 months) and I fly to Ireland tomorrow to visit my family. Dd is till breastfeeding too much loads and is thriving.

From what I can gather bf rates must be very low back home. No-one I know breastfeeds. 4 school friends have had babies recently and in every single set of photos I've seen taken in the hospital the baby is on the bottle straight away.

So while most of my family are supportive I am feeling a bit defensive already about the ones who will passively aggressively ask dd why she isn't off 'it' yet.

Any firm but not angry retorts you can lend me??

So far I have 'Well actually the WHO recommends bf as the best option up to 2 years'.

Bunny - the WHO says 'a least 2 years' not up to 2 years.

As a retort, how about saying 'she has other foods as well, you know....this is the best milk for her, that's all.'

I mean, they will agree an 18mth old needs milk, yes? So why would cows milk be better than human milk?

Or 'we like it - and what's wrong with it, FFS?'

Thanks tiktok for the info and the suggestions

I don't know why some older people object to it.

My mother in the past has trotted out the 'Once they're old enough to ask for it they're too old to be getting it' remark.

I imagine she won't be too amused to see dd running across the room to me shouting BOOBIES

I have noticed that now that dd is a toddler rather than a wee baby I have become more nervous about feeding her in front of people and try to avoid doing it. Sad isn't it?

im feeding my 16mo, cant imagine stopping aniytme soon.
i know what you are saying, just want to say you are not alone.
lets pave the way for our children.

Thanks motherlovebone

Perhaps just a shocked 'Oh gosh no stopping yet, she loves it!'....

'I couldn't do that to her, it's so good for her'

'She really enjoys it, so not yet'

'stopping, no. Why do you ask?'

nothing negative or defensive just positive.

(hate anyone children saying boobies though)

love the second one Posy.

how about 'you are joking, with all the calories this burns off! pass me the biscuits'

"oh yes, I'd much rather be giving her milk that comes out of another animal's tits"

(followed by suitable gaggy boaky rolly-eyed aren't you all so schtooooopid looks)

Loving these guys

I think the 'well, what she drinks, I get to have in chocolate' works quite well, but could go down the 'you aren't doing it for her, but for you' line.

'gosh, no, it's fantastic we are still bfing isn't it - my HV is really pleased' gives the firm impression that it is the right thing, and that it's not just you

'it's cheaper than follow on milk!'

and

'after all the effort I put in at the beginning, she'd better not give up yet!'

I've used both these when family and friends have told me I should be weaning DS. who is 5 months old...

Just smile and say "No, there's no need to"

"What are you talking about? She hasn't had a cold in _ months." (My DS had hardly any colds till I stopped bf, and even now it's not too many).

or "I'm very lucky to be able to do this." (they may be sniffing because they "had to get on with it". Acknowledging that you are in a lucky position might help soothe these feelings.)

Oh, I just say "Are you kidding. I'm going to be one of those women still feeding a seven year old the amount she loves it." and grin. No one's quite sure if you're joking so they normally shut up.

'No. Why would we stop now?'

Then shoot any 'reasons' down in flames.

Thanks all!

I feel ready to tackle any and all comments. Hopefully I'm being too negative and there won't be any at all.

What CMOT suggested, along the, doing it for me, not for her. Maybe joke, 'it burns off soooo many calories! Are you kidding, otherwise I'd have to start dieting...'

Or if someone suggests you stop, you could look straight in the eye and say, 'OMG! You're right. The WHO advice is bollocks. I'll take yours instead...'

What about: 'I have theory. As I drink so much Guinness, DD doesn't have to have any iron supplements.'

"Didn't you know its the fashion now? Haven't you seen Little Britain?"

"Are you jealous, would YOU like some?"

Not to mention of course that restaurateur that used his wife's excess breast milk to make cheese, in the news recently

, or is that just plain evil?

good ideas above!

"Well, I don't have any other plans for them just now, so she might as well keep them"!

"It's free"

I bf my dd up to 18 mos when she rudely decided to stop!

I feel sad your mum isn't backing you up - my mum was my champion! My mil however thought I was a freak. But tbh, the feeling is pretty mutual.

Anyway, to the "aren't you weaning her off that yet" all I ever said back was "No, why?" and smiled sweetly. Then walk away, makes it very clear it's not up for discussion

Hostile dead silence for aboput 45 seconds until the world cools down 25 degrees, birds stop singing and squirrels fall out of the trees.

Stare of utter disgust and hostility for further 10 seconds.

Then turn away ignoring the frightened sobs of your interlocutor.

Worth practicing beforehand.

I don't hold with this namby pamby "that's what the WHO says".

WickedWitch It's not that she's out and out against it. She's not one of these weirdos who thinks it's 'wrong' or 'weird'.

In fact I think she is begrudgingly admiring of me.

But it's so so different to when she had me and my siblings and as I said it's not the norm in Northern Ireland. Over there it's stick the bottle in them straight away.

I think she sees it as just one more way in which I'm the different one in the family and maybe thinks I'm deliberately trying to be different when in fact it's just worked out that naturally dd is still feeding.

Thanks again everyone. I think I'll just go for the "No why?" and the sweet smile through gritted teeth

Oh, also wanted to say.

I have relatives in Northern Ireland and it sounds pretty similar. I've never seen an older baby feeding in public.

BUT my relatives are very supportive and I've never had a negative comment whilst visiting either. My DD is a fair bit younger, so don't know how they'd react past a year (thankfully DD has usefully dropped to just morning and night, so it will be no one else's business for the forseeable future).

catinthehat, I love it! I'm off to practise icy silences...

I definitely like catinthehat's suggestion best.

But if you want something a little softer then I'd go for "No." . I'd avoid saying "no, why?" as it invites a comeback. If you practice a few times so that you can really ennunciate the full stop of "No." then I've found people take the hint.

Good luck; as you say you'll probably not have any issues