Am I putting my baby at risk?

[tryingtobemarypoppins2]

DS2 is 2 weeks old. We are sleeping together in our double bed. DH is sleeping else where as he is having trouble sleep at the moment (medical reasons).

DS2 is fab, breastfeeds laying down on and off, sleeping through really. I am getting lots of sleep as a result. He sleeps swaddled and my covers are not on top of him. We have lots of room in bed, we are a non smoking house, I don't take drugs/medicines etc.

HV says this is not a great idea, she also says sleeping swaddled is not advised either!? My husbands brother died of a cot death and HV thinks we shouldn't take any risks.

Now I feel terrible but it works for us and I need night times to work as I have a toddler too. What do you think?

We always coslept in this way alhtough never got the hang of the swaddling thing.

It sounds like you are doing co sleeping exactly by the book to me

some hv's just dont like the idea of it and say its not good

you're fine. i do think swaddling is not advised, although personally we found it really helped ds1, he wasn't in our bed though.

i think you're doing great though, co-sleeoping is NOT dangerous if done properly, which you are

Would you not swaddle then?? DS2 loves it

I did it with DS1 and am doing it again with DS2. I tried everything to get them into cots (well, no, not everything.)

I think you have to weigh up the pros and cons yourself- HV told me not to, but after I said I was knackered, she said that I should "do what you have to do."

Will be watching this thread with interest...

I wouldn't swaddle legs at all - as can impede hip development I believe. I don't know about arms - just try not to do it too tight I suppose.

I think swaddling only works for the first month or so anyway to ease transition into world from womb, after that I think they settle fine without ( you may obviously find otherwise)

Research safe co-sleeping and follow all rules.
From research I have done, I am aware that in countries where co-sleeping is all they do, they have not heard of SIDS. I don't know what smothering rates are though.

I surmise that the risk of smothering, with right safety precautions in place is equal to the risk of babe dying in cot on its own from SIDS. Sleeping next to your baby so it can feel your heart rate helps keep it's heart rate steady, I believe.

Try to accept your choice, and enjoy it.

Check in Sleep section as lots of co sleepers over there. Also great ideas for swaddling too.

I have slept with all 3 of mine like this minus the swaddling.

As someone else said it is the norm in other countries and was here until a few hundred years ago when it was decided that putting babies in boxes with bars on them was better for them.

how about using a woombie instead of swaddling..... search on google....

You might find this book useful: 'Three in a Bed' by Deborah Jackson on the benefits of (safe) cosleeping, and for lots of research on the supposed risks. It's true what was said above about cultures that cosleep have much fewer incidents of SIDS than white western culture. This is from Jackson's book:

'... in countries where babies routinely sleep with their parents for the first few years of life, there is usually a very low rate of SIDS ... '

She cites all sorts of studies to back up her claims. I don't think your HV's advice is unusual, but it is perhaps ill informed.

The co-sleeping/breastfeeding sounds great, and is exactly what I did (still do).

The swaddling... well, I never did that. My personal feeling is that part of safe co-sleeping is ensuring the baby can physically alert its mum to any hazard it encounters, and/or move covers, for example, away from it's face itself. Even young babies can and do interact with their parents & environment in this way, and I would be a little concerned that swaddling could prevent that type of response. However - you are the expert on your baby and your bed sharing environment!

Three in a bed is an excellent book - get it and enjoy it (if you can find the time ).

I didn't swaddle - DS wasn't keen after the first day or two - but a friend always swaddled and then loosened the blanket once the baby is asleep. I think it's at least partly to do with them being able to get their arms out if necessary to regulate their temperature.

I've co-slept on and off with DS (now 14 months), and it's worked well for us.

My instincts say no to swaddling in bed though. Like cheesebaby says "Even young babies can and do interact with their parents & environment in this way, and I would be a little concerned that swaddling could prevent that type of response."

It seems dangerous to me. I'm sure you're not meant to swaddle in bed?

Also we're aware of each other on some level and react to each other while sleep - swaddling would get in the way of this. DP says it's spooky to see us together - our movements mirror each other in our sleep!

Thanks everyone, we had another great nights sleep/feed/sleep/feed. I think I will avoid the swaddling though. Thanks also for the links

I have got a bedside cot for my dd2 - it is great, like co-sleeping but without the smothering risk.

Bedside cots are great, but to be fair there's very little smothering risk with safe bed-sharing, and it's positively less risky than cot sleeping in many ways.

Yes to the cosleeping, but no to the swaddling. Your baby needs to be able to escape (fully capable from birth) if he/she is too hot/cold/restricted).

The cosleeping thing works because mother and baby respond to each other so preventing that increases the risks of cosleeping.

The research seems to suggest that cosleeping done properly is actually safer than sleeping alone in a cot.

That is really reassuring that it could be safer, thank-you.