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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

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Original poster

dummies - am I a bad mother if I use one?

18 replies

stapes · 28/02/2010 16:30

Am I a bad mother if I use a dummy wih my 6 week old? How can I ensure it doesn't interfere with feeding on demand?

OP posts:

Reallytired · 28/02/2010 16:37

I don't think you would be a bad mother. Lots of babies use a dummy or suck their thumb. If you have a particularly sucky baby its a godsend.

rainfatclouds · 28/02/2010 16:40

A. NO.

B. No idea.

rainfatclouds · 28/02/2010 16:40

A. NO.

B. No idea.

BertieBotts · 28/02/2010 16:42

No, not at all! About feeding on demand, I suppose, try not to use the dummy to stretch out feed times. Do you mind me asking when/how you are thinking of using it? Just to be able to advise on the second question better

BridesheadRegardless · 28/02/2010 16:46

No. babies hsve a need to suck more often then they need to feed imo, so using a dummy is often very soothing.

When called 'soothers' rather than 'dummies' they seem positive rather than negative.

Mishy1234 · 28/02/2010 16:49

Not at all. Depends on the baby though. Some are more sucky than others and some just don't take to them at all.

I didn't use one as DS wouldn't take it, so can't answer your second question, but I know loads of people who fed on demand and used them.

Original poster

stapes · 28/02/2010 16:52

I have been struggling to get her to sleep in her moses basket so though I might use dummy to help with this. Also, she is on the breast almost every hour - I can't believe she is really feeding all of this time so I was going to try and stretch out the times between feeding slightly with the use of a dummy but, obviously, I don't want her to go hungry!

OP posts:

Missus84 · 28/02/2010 16:54

Once feeding is established I don't think dummies interfere, do they?

DorotheaPlenticlew · 28/02/2010 17:01

DS used a dummy. No probs feeding at all (b/f on demand), although he did become very dependent on it.

We will still use one for next baby if it seems to be wanted; it can be a godsend! But we will prob be more cautious about how/when it is deployed (well, I say that now, but my resolve is likely to crumble when the broken nights kick in).

Whatever you decide it won't make you a bad mother! I worried about that too ... 'tis rubbish though.

WidowWadman · 28/02/2010 17:07

Your child will show you when he wants boob and when the dummy is enough. Usually by spitting the dummy out. Never found it to be a problem with demand feeding but it took a while to find a dummy my daughter liked.

confusedfirsttimemum · 28/02/2010 17:08

I used a dummy for DD. She was just a very sucky baby. When she wanted a feed though, she would have nothing to do with the dummy at all. Maybe try a dummy and see if feed times increase massively. If they do, it might be interfering, if not...

FWIW, DD refused the dummy from about 8-9 months, when she found her thumb.

susiey · 28/02/2010 17:13

my sanity was aved my dummies

when I had my ds he was my second child it meant at bedtime I could put my daughter to bed and bath her and delay his feed for a little while. It didn't interfere with my milk

also found it a life saver when carrying him the the sling near foodtime.Having the boobs so close used to drive hiom mad! so popped a dummy in and he would be fooled for the few minutes it took till we were home

MickyF · 28/02/2010 20:58

I use a dummy for my 4 week old DS as he is very sucky mid-day time and last thing at night. Plus isnt there new research that suggests that using a dummy cuts the risk of cot death? Might be worth checking it out plus I am the firm beliver that if it helps to give you more time to rest / do the nessessary things / calms him then you are both going to be happier!

RubyBuckleberry · 28/02/2010 21:06

i've used a dummy a couple of times when DS (5months) has had a complete meltdown. It really calmed him down, to expend some of that energy - I think it is when he gets overtired for whatever reason.

RubyBuckleberry · 28/02/2010 21:09

(ds ebf on demand) its not interfered at all. I think if used alot, it would, but as people have said if the baby is hungry rather than just wanting something to suck on, it'll probably let you know

chegirlshadabloodynuff · 28/02/2010 21:32

I have bf all my birth children and they have all had dummies.

I didnt have any problems feeding any of them. I found I sort of knew if they wanted feeding or comforting. They soon let you know if you gave them the wrong thing to suck on

I am assuming that babies would be happy using the breast for comfort and dont really need a dummy but if you have a very sucky baby its not always practical.

I am a dummy fan. They have their disadvantages but if used sensibly I think they are brilliant.

eagerbeagle · 01/03/2010 07:45

I use a dummy with DS. Saved my sanity. He demand feeds (still BFing now at nearly 10mo) but would never be satisfied with the dummy if he really wanted boob - dummy would just be spat right out. But when he was stressy or tired the dummy would work wonders. He is what I would call a sucky baby - always has been.

InmaculadaConcepcion · 01/03/2010 15:59

I was never a fan of dummies, but my LO likes to suckle endlessly in the evening and I'm pretty sure it's just for comfort. If I allow it, she gets indigestion from too much milk and is then impossible to settle. Giving her the dummy seems to answer the need to suck while giving her digestive system a chance to process the milk she's had.

Basically, I'm a convert!

As the other posters have said, if she's genuinely hungry, the dummy won't cut it and she spits it out immediately - not difficult to tell when she genuinely wants a feed!

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