BF and have to go abroad with work, really stressed, help!!

[notsotinybaba]

I'm bfeeding 14MO DD (early morning and bedtime). I went back to work a couple of months ago and have found it really really tough.

I now have to go abroad for 3 days and I am really stressed about it. I have never been away from DD and she has never taken a bottle.

I'm worried that DD won't drink while I'm away (she hardly drinks anything apart from our bfeeds, despite us trying to offer water since she was 6MO).

I'm also worried that she will want to stop bf when I go away, or that that I will not be able to express and end up with no milk. We both love bf and I plan to continue as long as she wants. I don't want to have to stop because of work.

Has anyone else had to deal with this? Any advice would be greatly appreciated, am quite upset about this

if i were in your situation then i would do all i could not to go away.

am ssure plenty of people will come on and say oh, go, it'll be fine. and you know what, it probably will.
but i still wouldn't do it. not unless I absolutely had no choice at all

I have tried to avoid going, and have already avoided 4 other trips, but I have to explain complex spreadsheets to people in Spain, and it just hasn't worked over the phone.

I started a new job after mat leave and haven't told my boss I'm bfeefing, do you think I should?. I'm not ashamed of still feeding but feel a bit weird about discussing it, especially with someone I don't really know as its very personal. I also don't think my boss will understand.

ooops bfeeding, not bfeefing!

Could you bring her with you?

Honestly, it will be fine!
Your milk will still be there (after such a long time it stays arounds for days, weeks, even months!)
She will drink when she is thirsty, that i can guarantee.

it is an idea to take her with you though actually. if you have a friend who could travel with you?

Thanks for the reassurance Moondog. Gosh I had no idea your milk stayed for that long, will my boobs not explode if I leave them a few days??!!. So do I not need to express?

Ilovemydog - I thought about that, but DH would need to come too as I have back to back meetings. Thought we could go for a bit of a holiday, but the office is not near anything and also the flights are expensive.

Waswondering - its good to know I'm not alone, and such a relief that you didn't have to stop bfeeding after 3 days away. Did you express?

Thanks everyone, feeling better now

Waswondering - crosspost! thank you!

I was away over night when the daughter was 13 months old. I expressed once before going to bed, just as a relief, but the daughter coped very well without me.

I would think you will be fine - but take a breast pump just in case you become uncomfortable (although I would say it would be doubtful if you are only feeding twice a day). Doing a trial run before you go may put your mind at rest!

BUT if you feel really uncomfortable about it, then do try to explore other options. My job involves international travel, but I asked my boss if it could be delayed until DD was 18mo. He was okay about it - and we worked around it. How about videoconferencing?

I have gone away several times when ds3 and ds4 were being bf, for 2 or 3 days at a time, once when ds4 was 5 months old. I always took a pump and pumped as often as I could manage but got more blase about it when they were toddlers. Ds3 was a total bottle refusenik but he still drank something when I was away but only from an open topped cup.

I'd not thought about being able to have a few drinks, and also read a book and have a long bath, don't get the chance much these days!

Undercova - Tried videoconference but the language barrier was a problem, we're probably going to have a translator when we go to Spain.

Thanks for the support everyone, still feel nervous but also relieved that bfeeding doesn't have to end just yet.

notsotinybaba, just to say something else. After I finished bfing ds1 I could express a little milk for months afterwards. If you think about it nature would have to allow for times when mum is separated from baby or when Mum or baby is ill etc. The milk doesn't disappear all that quickly!

I went abroad for a conference for 4 days when dd was 5 months old. Actually worked quite well, with the freezer stocked with ebm beforehand. I did have to pump and discard while I was away but that was a minor inconvenience. And breastfed for another 6 months after I got back.

I've managed two weeks away from breastfeeding - not by choice! Toddler went on holiday and whilst away I was taken into hospital. Still going now. Milk can take years to dry up. Your body is used to the demand not being as strong and often now as it was with a newborn so it shouldn't be too uncomfortable, although you may want to take a pump just to relieve yourself - bringing milk back may be difficult!

Having said that, I spent a day away from my baby doing Doula training and leaked a lot! My trainer kept laughing at me because I was having let down pains! I think spending a day with a group of women talking about babies is what did it.