Help! I've got myself all confused!!

[Ladyem]

Please help me, I'm so confused!

My DS is 27 weeks old and has been exclusively breastfed until the last couple of weeks when I have started him on a bit of solids. He's never had a bottle of any form, although I have tried once or twice, but it has been unsuccessful. I always thought that I would BF up until 6 months and then start weaning onto a bottle of formula so that at 7/8 months he would be totally on the bottle.

The problem is that I'm not so sure I want to do this now. I have been very lucky in that I have found BFing very easy this time around (I had lots of problems with DD due to her having a birthing injury - erbs palsy and facial palsy, resulting in bad latch in the early days. Took 4 weeks to get her to feed from me properly.) I am feeling pressure - not my lovely DH, though, he is very supportive - to stop now he is getting bigger but then when I sit and think about it I start to wonder why on earth I would want to start faffing about with sterilizing, bottles, formula etc when I have a ready supply right here all of the time!

But then it would be lovely to be able to get DH to feed him once in a while.... [dreams of sitting in peace with a cuppa and free arms emoticon!] I also have a couple of days lined up in April where I will be away for the whole day (including a lovely Spa day which I had for Xmas! ) So DS needs to be able to take a bottle by then so I can leave him for the day.

I am so confused as to how I can make this all work so that I can have the odd day away, but not affect my supply, should I choose to continue.

Is it possible to cut down to doing just, say, the first feed and last feed of the day, then any night feeds as required?

Also, if I started to introduce a bottle of formula in the day, would the rest of the BFs that I give him still give him protection against illnesses etc?

Sorry this is so rambling, but I have got myself very confused about all for this, when the answer is probably very simple, I just need it pointing out to me!!

TIA

if you reeeeeeeally want to give a bottle then why not just express some milk and use that?

don't let anyone else pressure you into stopping. your son isn't big! he is still a little tiny baby. WHO recommend ebf for 6 months, followed by continued breastfeeding alongside a varied diet for at least 2 years, so, you can always just say you're following current guidelines! but really, it's up to you to decide when to stop breastfeeding, not anyone else.

it's perfectly possible to just add in the odd formula feed if you wish to. personally i'd rather give all breastmilk, but that's just my choice

Thanks for the reply! I have started expressing some milk this week in case I decided to take this route! I think I would rather give all BM instead of formula (why not, it's free after all!!), although I think that if I am going to give a bottle at all I am going to have to start making it a daily thing so that I can be confident that he will take a bottle while I'm away for the whole day.

I think I'm so confused because I thought I had it all mapped out and now I feel totally different about it all so it has scuppered my plans!! You think that I'd know not to make plans by now!! With DD I BF until she was 5.5 months and by that time I was totally ready so was ok when she dropped the last couple of feeds I was doing, but I think that was because it was such a hard slog in the first place!

I just need to get it straight in my mind and then I'll be ok! It's not that I really want to give a bottle, it's that I would like to have the option!

I think that also I've been very apologetic about BFing around people, when in fact, I should be proud. You see why I'm confused! I'm trying to please every one else, while doing the best for my DS!

If he won't take a bottle he might prefer a cup at this age anyway. One less thing to wean from!

Thanks faintly, I'd not thought of that. Would he be able to take a full feed from a cup? Do you have any recommendations on types?

By April he will be 8 months. He might be ok with just food and water in the day, if he doesn't get keen on bottles, and the day isn't too long. It's not worth getting too stressed about this now, I don't think. If you want to carry on feeding, carry on!

I'm afraid that I since I was rubbish at expressing DS just had water from a cup from about 6 months, never a milk feed. So I can't give much advice. DS could drink from a free-flow Tommee Tippee cup, but we were really just treating it as practice rather than a significant source of fluid, IYSWIM. I think an open cup is ok at this age too. Someone else will know more about this than me!

Another vote for getting your DC used to a cup not a bottle. It sometimes take a few tries to get the right kind of cup. Sometimes they prefer soft spout ones, but usually can't cope with non-spill yet.

Oh, and my DC4 is the same age. Its always when I start getting an itch to stop breastfeeding, as having a social life seems within reach again (and getting them used to solids, plus then breastfeeding is very time consuming). But once I've got through to 8-9 months when the baby is taking 3 meals a day happily and has dropped some few feeds and taking water from a cup so I can leave them sometimes, I'm really glad to have persisted and continue until they self wean (between 1 year and 18 months with all my other DC). I've also noticed big health differences between my DC age 6-18 months and ff friends; none of my DC have ever had an ear infection, for example.

Thanks for all of the replies! It's becoming a bit clearer in my head now! I'm going to investigate cups to try instead of a bottle and carry on expressing to build a store in the freezer.

I'm having a hard time convincing certain family members that I BFing is of benefit to my baby. My Mum is very skeptical about it all and always uses the fact that my cousins where BF and were apparently always ill, where as my siblings and I were FF and were quite sturdy children. So there is no convincing her that it is better! I tried to tell her that the studies involve more than 6 children!!

Anyway, I'm feeling much better about it all now I have a plan!! Thanks, everyone! xx

I have heard from a few mums that their babies only took a bottle when it wasn't given by them. They got their DH to offer a bottle when they were right out of the room.

Rationale for this being that when there's a boob in the room, why would the baby want a bottle and especially if it's you offering the bottle.

That said, I never used a bottle with either of mine and went straight onto cups/beakers at 4-6m.

Well done on a cracking job - never easy when the family don't get it.

Thanks KernowMother! Must admit I have been either the one to give the bottle or I was in the room at the time, so no wonder he wouldn't take it!! DD, on the other hand, would take from anything - boob/avent bottle/tommee tippee bottle/cup!! Just goes to show how different they all are!!

I would recommend a doidy cup:

www.nctshop.co.uk/Bickiepegs-Doidy-Cup/productinfo/2003/

Thanks for that carrots! They look rather nifty!

Saw the nursery nurse at our local clinic yesterday for some more advice about BFing and weaning and she basically said the same as all on here about using cups etc, so I'm feeling much better about it all now, just need to have something lined up to say when people comment that I should be stopping by now!

Thanks again! xx

I 2nd the doidy cups. I bought some for daughter's friends with babies of 10 months and 6 months . The Mums had not heard of them but really like them now.