Just a few thoughts about breastfeeding

[SPBInDisguise]

and bfip
It seems like some bfers see 'feeds' as specific set things in their own right, so when they decide the baby needs a feed they start feed and then the baby stops when he's had enough. Other people, me included (or is it in fact just me) use feeds as a way to distract an irritable baby. I have a 5mo, and if she's grumpy, clean nappy, I'll try chatting/playing, then if that doesn't work (or she's obviously tired I'll just try to feed her. Sometimes the 'feed' lasts 30s and then we'll do it again 10 mins later.
So...is one way better than the other? Does it vary with age? When i see it written like that i feel lazy, but it's so easy. Do I do it because of the type of baby I have, or is it that if i tried a bit harder to distract when she's grumpy it would work?
this is not about feeding on demand vs set times, it's more about...i don't know using the breast as a form of comfort even when a feed's not required,

This is normal, perfectly physiological (ie what your body and your baby's body 'expect' to happen), and it's how babies have been nurtured for 99.99 per cent of human existance, SPB.

The physiologically and historically normal way to care for a young baby is to keep her close for much of the day and night and to respond, almost without thinking, to the baby's signalled needs...this sort of merges with the baby getting to more or less help herself as she gets older.

The only difference would be that a breastfeed would be the first thing, not the last thing, on offer to a baby who seemed to need attention/response/cuddle/chat

Yes I did this but usually only when we were out somewhere and I needed ds to be quiet/calm down etc quickly. At home I would always try other methods first and they usually worked if I perserved (unless he was overtired). Don't really do it at all anymore as it doesn't really work now (he's 10.5mo) unless he's very tired.

I could have saved myself a lot of stress with DC1 if I hadn't thought of bf as specific feeds for the first few months of his life. With DC2 I offer bf all the time really, just check in with her whenever I sit down with her on my lap or whenever she grizzles even slightly really and it has been a lot easier. I don't try to avoid going out at feeding times with DC2, I just assume that I will be able to feed her as and when and that otherwise she can wait happily enough if we are on the move as it will never have been that long since she last fed.

When my ds was little, breastfeeding sorted everything. I say little, but I think it sorted everything until he turned 3 ish.

But then I have met others whose babies don't really feed much for comfort.

So, as with all things baby related, I guess they are all different.

i am finding DD is less inclined to use the breast for comfort now

she feeds and if she isn't interested she won't latch

She is coming up for 19 weeks

this morning she was making the most gorgeous noises as i fed her laying down - she was stroking my boob, like it was the best thing in the world - which it is for her!

I took DD on a 2.2 hour train journey as it was brill to be able to feed her then - she was around 14 weeks ... no-one heard a peep from her

thanks for all replies
part of what made me think about this is that's how i fed DS but they are very different. He'd have fed 24 hours a day if i'd let him, apart from sleeping and so it wsas the only way. was never really interested in books/toys/food until quite old. DD is iunterested in books & toys and so i have had to train myself out of feeding her whenever she's awake, pretty much! Obviously thjat was fine until about 3 months, but i do think she doesn't always want a feed when i offer one, she latches on to humour me, then comes off.
This isn't a problem btw, was just wondering what makes some mothers/babies do one thing and some the other. Came to me when I saw a woman feeding at another table at soft play the other day - if I did that I'd be constantly up and down. But onbviously it works for her.
Never really understood the "what do you do all day with a 4mo / 6mo?" threads either until DD - with DS, answer was read while feeding. Or MN. Or sit in quiet desperation for the toilet.

maybe it is a second baby thing?

DD is fascinated by watching DS and just watching the world go by

there is more to distract her, and also i simply can't devote the same amount of attention to her as i would have done with DS

yes mawbroon! DD is 5 months and I have to cuddle her when she's tired or upset but doesn't want feeding! I didn't actually cuddle DS until he was over 2 i think - cuddles were feeds.
And i found it easier to get out & about when she was tiny, fed her through a directorate meeting when she was a few weeks, no way i could guarantee that now

yes, maybe thats it ruby.

This is how it's worked with mine too. It's good to see I'm not alone. Health visitors ask things like 'Is she due for a feed?' and I think 'Well, I can tell you how long since she stopped last, but I'm not a fortuneteller - I can't tell how long until she'll want feeding again, and I don't need to! My breasts are always here!'

yes, been giving dd infacol recently, says "one before each feed".
I've assumed every 2 or 3 hours, otherwise the bottle would be gone in a day!

In a way it's one of the things I fear most about giving up when I go back to work is that I won't be able to feed DD to comfort her should she need it.

mcflumpy, you don't have to give up, if you carry on as normal when you are not at work your supply should adjust

This is what I do instinctively but I have to have thick skin to ignore the comments from those around: "feeding again?"

I have just spent 2 weeks at my parents' house on my own with 12wo DS and had nothing to do except attend to his every need. Cue him feeding more and being calmer and more contented than at home, where I'm often rushing around trying to get things done and saying "just wait a moment DS".

just shows doesn't it - they know what's best for them