Slightly jaundiced 4 day old won't feed

[skibelle]

DS was born last Fri by ELCS (he was breech) He's my first baby, so it was all a bit of a shock, but I got my head round the cs and it was actually a good experience.

DS was 6lb7 and fed ok in recovery, but then wouldn't really latch well thereafter. I ended up hand expressing into a syringe on one occasion but we had help at most feeds and got things going quite well after that. DS would latch and suck ok, and though I was a bit concerned, everyone said the latch was good. He did lots of stopping but would start again without breaking away.

So now I'm home and cant get him to feed. At first he would latch and suck a few times then fall asleep (despite changing him, stripping, cool room, tickling etc etc) but now I can't really even get him to latch. We had a horrendous sleepless night with him screaming and ravenous, but unable to get him to feed.

He's a little jaundiced and this was getting worse, so when midwife came out today she watched me try to feed and said it all looked ok but he was just having none of it. He was really dehydrated so we gave him a little bottle of ff. I wasn't keen but realised it was absolutely necessary. I seem to have quite flat nipples which have been made worse as my milk's come in so she suggested expressing a little to pull them out a bit before feeding. It hasn't really worked so far but I'll keep trying, so I am now expressing and giving him that from a bottle if he won't feed.

I am really trying to stay calm and not get upset but it's SO hard! Definite case of the baby blues too. I feel completely useless and couldn't stop crying earlier. I'm SURE it's normal to feel like this, but I wish I actually believed it!

Sorry this is so long, but I'd love any advice or calming words from anyone who has been here. Midwife will be back tomorrow to remove stitches so will reassess the jaundice etc then.

Congratulations on the birth of your son. You are not useless! The baby blues will make you feel very tearful, but that will pass - hang in there. It's good that your MW is coming back tomorrow.

It sounds as if some slightly more expert advice on the latch might help, ideally if you could be observed by a BF counsellor (they are the ones who have the most training, some MWs may also be BF counsellors but not many are). You can get in touch with one and maybe arrange to see one through one of the helplines in the morning:

National BF helpline 0300 100 0212
LLL 0845 120 2918
NCT 0300 330 0771

Does your local hospital do a drop-in clinic with BF trained people that you can go to for a while? That can be invaluable too - you may be able to just sit there for an hour or so with the baby (and a cup of tea!) and they will be able to observe any feeds that happen then. It can seem like a huge hassle to get to one but can be a godsend. And if there is a clinic like that they'll be used to tearful mums so don't worry about that side of things!

Try to stay calm despite the tearfulness, it will probably look a bit better in the morning. Finally although this isn't much help right now, you may be reassured to know that it often does get easier as their mouths get a little bigger. BF experiences evolve as the baby grows: in the first couple of months no two weeks are alike.

If you're up late and browsing also look here www.kellymom.com/. But most helpful is likely to be getting someone trained to look at the whole latching process - it really can work wonders.

I hope you have a good night and things look a little better in the morning. Although I didn't have your particular problem I did have different problems and I know how nightmarish it can be at times - absolutely the best thing I did was getting the more expert help so I'd def recommend that.

Thank you, that's really helpful and makes me feel better! In my heart of hearts I know I'm not useless but just feel it a bit at the mo!

We had a good nct class with one of their counsellors so I might ring her tomorrow or go along to their 'cafe'.

It's so frustrating, when breastfeeding is not going well.

Unfortunately, giving a bottle (BM or formula) can encourage babies to latch badly - but they may be able to show you how to cupfeed at the drop in, so you can still give expressed milk.

Please do ring the local NCT BF counsellor, she will be able to help.

I had exactly the same problem - little bit of jaundice, very un-hungry DD at 2-3 days. snatchy, cross, wail-y feeding, never for more than a few sucks at a time - really really stressful and she was losing weight. I really sympathise

the midwife actually sent us back into hospital for 24 hours and it was a godsend. I stopped panicking that she was going hungry because there were always people around to help with the latch, plus there was nothing to distract me from feeding. we topped up twice after feeding with a cup (better than bottle like people have said) and both she and I got better at it. I never realised breastfeeding would be so hard

all I can say is hang in there and you are so not alone and clamour for help from a breastfeeding counsellor.

(ps DD now (at grand old age of 12 days) feeds like a cheerful pig - I still can't quite believe it.)

Thanks for all your advice. It's so comforting to know I'm not alone, as it's horrible feeling so helpless! Actually, we had already tried feeding a little from a cup, but he brought it back up. Prob just bad luck, but put me off continuing that way thinking maybe I'd got it wrong.

Anyway, I was dreading last night but actually we stayed chilled and, lo and behold, he fed happily from the breast in the night and has done so each time since. I think expressing a little first really helped to draw my nipples out for him and he could smell/taste the milk first. He's happier and waking to feed every 2 hours and has spent the day in the sun which I'm sure has helped the jaundice and my mood.

I didn't speak to the nct lady today, but will do tomorrow just to get in contact for my peace of mind. I think it's highly unlikely we'd both be admitted back to hospital unless it was really necessary as they're super busy at the moment. I feel like we're making progress though, so thanks again.

That's great news about him latching on, skibelle, so glad to read that.