Should I complain? - Not allowed to bottle fed while BF-ing is allowed?

[angel1976]

Was at the Museum of Docklands with DH, DS1 and DS2 on the weekend. They have a great section for the kiddies called Mudlarks that has a soft play area. Also a seating section in the corner. Three-month-old DS2 is bottle-fed from week 1. I had a lot of issues trying to BF DS1 (including medical issues) and was in pieces about it for weeks before reluctantly giving up at six weeks with DS1. Doesn't sound like a long time but I went through hell and back that time and even the BF counsellor told me to give DS1 formula and even got the health visitor to come and see me as she was so concerned about my mental state. With DS2, I recognised a lot of the same issues and gave up BF-ing very quickly as I had DS1 to look after as well. I still have a complex about not being able to BF and conscious about feeding DS2 in public (but I promise you I am not the mad woman in Bluewater from the other thread! !).

So we got to the museum and DS1 headed straight to the Mudlarks area. I went to go in and the 'helper' was being a bit pedantic about stuff ('No water, no food' and checking the heights of the children before allowing them into soft play and actually refusing entry to a couple of siblings just over height restrictions! ) so I casually asked if I could feed DS2 in there. And he said BF-ing is allowed but not bottle-feeding...

Pardon me? I couldn't quite believe it and checked with him again and he said no to bottle feeding. So I had to sit outside, in a badly lit sitting area to feed DS2 instead of being able to watch DS1 playing with DH. I did feel very much the outcast. I have to say I didn't ask the reason why though...

Are they justified in doing this? Is there a good reason to allow BF-ing and not bottle feeding? I want to make a complaint cos to be honest, it's a contentious enough issue without family-friendly places like that making more divisions... Thanks.

I am very pro BF but have 2 adopted children and after having bottle fed them and put up with comments from complete strangers as to why I wasn't BF, I understand completely how upsetting it can be.
My sister has never been able to BF due to split nipples.
This was discrimination without thought.

Complain! They are idiots, your DS has a right to be fed, he's a baby. As other posters have said what would have happened if your DH hadn't been there, no dount you'd have had to feed in the other area trying to keep your DS1 entertained.

This is the email I sent!

Dear Sir/Madam,

I visited your museum (Docklands) with my husband and two sons (one aged two and the other aged three months) on the morning of Saturday, 6 February.

We arrived around 11am and headed straight to Mudlarks, your area for young children. We were told there was no drink or food allowed in the area. As it was feeding time for my three-month-old, I asked the attendant if it was okay to feed my younger son as my older son wanted to play in the soft play area.

I was told breast-feeding was allowed but not bottle-feeding. As I was bottle-feeding, I was asked to leave the area and to sit in another part of the museum, out of sight from my husband and older son.

I did not question this at the time even though I was rather shocked. Why is there this discrimination against mothers who bottle-feed? Unless there is a valid health/safety reason for this (I cannot think of one reason at the moment for this unusual policy), I would urge you to reconsider this guideline. If I had been alone with my two sons, I would have been left with the rather unsavory option of having to entertain a lively two-year-old while trying to feed a young infant in a dark part of the museum.

Whichever way you choose to feed your infant, you should not be discriminated against. As it is, whether you are a breast-feeding or bottle-feeding mum, you are often subject to public opinion (whether you ask for it or not) as to whether this is 'right'. There is no right or wrong in choosing how you feed your infant so I feel it's wrong for the museum to make this an issue. For a family-friendly attraction, I feel the museum should be more inclusive of mothers who bottle feed their children.

I would appreciate a reply to my letter.

Many thanks,
(angel1976)

Not that I agree with what they have done, could it have been they tried to stop all feeding of all ages in any form. but, they couldn't with breastfeeders because the law says a mother is allowed to breastfeed her baby anywhere she is allowed to be. i.e. if the bf mothers allowed to be there, she can feed. (I haven't seen this law, its what my HV told me when I started feeding).

I think it probably is a worry about mess, rather than a 'discrimination' about ff.

Some 9mth olds can toddle around, they are still babies, should they be allowed to walk around with a bottle?

They should say, babies under 6mths can bottle feed but not over

I can see why you were upset OP, but I doubt it is judgement on the relative merits of breast vs bottle. With a daughter who is anaphylactic to cow's milk I would not want her in the play area if someone were bottle feeding. Just a drop or two could be a disaster for us (it was when we gave her some when she was very small), whereas no one is anaphylactic to breast milk.Just to put the other side of the story.

Having said that, I was used to watching her like a hawk in these situations as food and drink are everywhere - but it was always far more relaxing if there was a ban (the only time I ever properly relaxed outside my own dairy free house really!)

I see all your points... Especially headabovewater, sorry about your daughter's allergies. I guess part of it has to be the draconian way they dished the guidelines out rather than explaining why this is so. Thanks all. It's all done now and I feel better and I don't care if they respond or not!