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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

HELP! Still struggling at 6 weeks...really need advice.

4 replies

StrikeUpTheBand · 26/01/2010 10:55

Hi,

I have posted before a couple of times. It's complicated, but I'll try and keep it brief. I have very flat/inverted nipples and had to exclusively express to feed my ds (now nearly 3) which I did for 6 months. I was expecting to do this all again for DD, but she managed to latch on shortly after birth. However, lack of support meant that after 2 days my milk was actually decreasing and she was awake all night each night bobbing on and off (in hospital). I asked for pump bits (had my own pumps) and expressed my concern that dd didn't seem to be feeding well and had slept through her feeds that day. Finally people started to take notice - and brought me pump bits. Breastfeeding counsellor was unhelpful and shoved my boob in sleeping dd's face, then proclaimed (not in so many words but implied) that it wasn't really ever going to work due to flat/inverted nipples and strongly hinted that I should express again. They also hinted that if I didn't give her formula until my milk came in they would get paed's involved etc and she could be kept in. DS was really struggling being apart from me so we decided to just do whatever it took to get us out of there.

I went home expressing and DD perked up a treat and started breastfeeding as well. On the second night my pump broke completely so I kept breastfeeding her and got DP to buy me a hand pump in the morning. However, after a few more days she wasn't feeding well and I was not able to express much whereas I had before. SHe had also dropped 80g in those few days. She had now gone down to 6lb7oz (1lb lower than her birthweight). So I bought a new double pump and started expressing again. She than of course perked up again and started feeding well. The midwife said that now it was time to decrease the expressing a bit and let her do it on her own. SO we tried it for a week (decreased the expressing over a few days). Her poo went nasty dark green, then lighter green, and sometimes runny. I asked the HV to weigh her again and after a week she had dropped 6oz . So was advised to top up with expressed milk after each feed, then express the next feed's top up.

I have been doing this for about a week now. SHe put on 10oz from Friday to Tuesday and she's being weighed again in clinic tomorrow. But I am struggling to express and breastfeed. She ALWAYS needs a top up (except maybe first thing in the morning). I am concerned that she is not and will not latch properly due to my nipple shape. When she was breastfeeding exclusively she was feeding constantly and never seemed full. Part of the problem was I was so tired and so was she that we both often fell asleep in the evenings (took it in turns) and the breasfeeding was not the best quality. Also my supply seemed to take a dip that week.
So...what do I do? I could start expressing exclusively which I think she would thrive on but she seems to really enjoy breastfeeding and will often refuse the bottle and then hit her head against my chest with her mouth open (perhaps indicating she wants to comfort feed at those times?). I can't seem to maintain her weight from just breastfeeding her apparently. I did go and see a bf counsellor 10 days ago but DD had recently fed (to get her out of the house) and was not interested in feeding which meant she was not doing a lot and kept falling asleep . She has had formula occasionally too - something I never wanted to do ( especially as she doesn't tolerate it well - possets and has a rash wherever it falls...plus has signs of excema (sp?)). Also, even though she's now feeding well her poo is often diarrhoea like and sometimes still green.

Aargh! Why does it have to be so hard?!? And to make it worse, for the last week I've had a crack on one nipple (caused by the handpump originally but it does hurt like hell when she feeds because it is like a tiny open bit).

Please, please can I have some advice on this. I feel so alone because if I mention it to anyone around me they tell me to just put her on a bottle. And I don't want to do that because of the worries that she is not taking formula well and also I want her to have breastmilk like DS.

Hope that wasn't too long and if you've read this far...thank you .

OP posts:
StrikeUpTheBand · 26/01/2010 10:59

"I can't seem to maintain her weight from just breastfeeding her apparently. I did go and see a bf counsellor 10 days ago but DD had recently fed (to get her out of the house) and was not interested in feeding which meant she was not doing a lot and kept falling asleep . She has had formula occasionally too - something I never wanted to do ( especially as she doesn't tolerate it well - possets and has a rash wherever it falls...plus has signs of excema (sp?)). Also, even though she's now feeding well her poo is often diarrhoea like and sometimes still green."

Sorry "to get her out of the house" means I had to feed her or else she'd cry and cry and we wouldn't have been able to get ready!

OP posts:
tiktok · 26/01/2010 11:24

StrikeuptheBand - what a difficult time you have had

(I am a bit shocked at the breastfeeding counsellor in hospital - she cannot have been a 'real' breastfeeding counsellor, surely? One trained properly would not do what you describe).

Might be worth seeing another bfc again, or to see the one you saw recently again.

I think you are right to be concerned about this, and it really needs someone to listen to the whole story in real life and to observe a feed.

Because of the weight loss, ensuring she has enough calories to grow and to have the energy to feed is really important, as far as I can see. At the moment, this might mean ensuring you express a lot (hand expressing if the pump has damaged you) as if you were expressing exclusively ie at least 8-10 times on both sides in 24 hours.In addition, though, of course you can feed direct - she seeks it, she likes it, and it keeps up her bf skills.

Biggest downside with expressing as often as this is that it is so time consuming, but you may not have to do it long term. Short term, it's needed to protect your milk supply and get sufficient breastmilk to nourish your dd.

What do you think?

Booyhoo · 26/01/2010 11:30

i just wanted to say that i am so sorry you are having such a difficult time and a huge well done for persevering this far. you really have done very well.

it really makes me so cross that people dont seem to be able to get the help they need form the people who should be providing it.

i hope you get help, you really do deserve it.

StrikeUpTheBand · 26/01/2010 16:45

Thanks Tiktok and Booyhoo

Tiktok I was thimking along the same lines this morning. The only trouble is trying to marry up breastfeeding with the expressing. I do sometimes resort to single pump expressing and let her go on the other side if she's crying and I need to express.

Speaking of which, she's crying now...!

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