Two week nursing strike - should I give up BF?

[Igglybuff]

Hi

My 14 week DS is two weeks into a nursing strike. He wont feed unless asleep (he even stops feeding if he wakes up.)

This is stressing me out. I have to make sure he gets a feed in every nap of the day otherwise he just wont eat and I can't express enough to satisfy him. At night he's feeding for half an hour at a time, waking up every two hours for a feed. Because he has reflux, I have to hold him upright after every feed. So that's killing me.

I've spoken to the NCT helpline twice but their suggestions aren't working. DS will latch on most times, take a couple of sucks and pull away violently. Sometimes he acts as if he cannot see the boob. Other times he'll take a few frantic sucks and no more.

I took him to the docs and they were pretty dismissive. I had to force them to check for thrush, teething and ear infection and nothing came up. I've got my third appointment on Tues as it could be his reflux. But he doesn't scream pulling off during a feed - he never has done. He does cry if I try when he's tired. This just came out of the blue. We've not had a change in routine, we had a quiet Xmas and no major upsets etc.

I really wanted to breastfeed until 6 months but this is looking unlikely now I'm absolutely gutted and I don't know what to do. I really don't want to give formula but I don't know how much longer I can hang on in there in case he decides to return to the breast.

Can anyone help me?

I've no real suggestions other than talk to your health visitor and try him with a bottle and see how he reacts. It won't harm him to try it and see what happens, then at least you'll know if it's a feeding thing or just a 'boob' thing.

ihatetinselbob he takes a bottle as I've had to give him EBM. He doesn't always seem keen though!

iggly - am so sorry. I wondered how you were getting on ...

have you called La Leche League? There is also the association of breastfeeding mothers

• National Breastfeeding Helpline 0300 100 0212
• National Childbirth Trust 0300 330 0771
• Breastfeeding Network 0300 100 0210
• La Leche League 0845 1202918
• Association of Breastfeeding Mothers 08444 122949

Hi ruby thanks. I've been laying low as this has been getting me down

I've only tried NCT - but will try the others as really desperate.

Ruby I've seen your thread and really feel for you. It's so hard!

iggly - am you are so low

i haven't experienced anything like a nursing strike but breastfeeding isn't a wonderful experience for me either (but for different reasons as you have seen from my other thread)

i have found the helplines useful in the past

good luck ...

Thanks ruby. I found it helpful to ring NCT as they gave me encouragement if anything. I'm going to try LLL for a change and see if they've got any words of wisdom.
It's hard because I want to do the right thing by my DS and feel that BF is right. I also feel guilty that I can't fix whatever is stopping DS from wanting to nurse and worry that he could be uncormfortable but I or the docs have missed something. I feel a bit pushy having my third GP appointmentin three weeks plus a referral to a paediatrician but not sure what else to do.
It's funny how you don't realise just how hard this would be but can't quite bring myself to give up as it would feel like the wrong decision.

Hi Igly, so sorry to hear you may need to stop bfing before you want to (I'm in a similar predicament due to biting ). My ds did something similar at that age due to having gut problems- I think he found it uncomfortable to feed. He also became very aware of his surroundings at that time and just wanted to look around instead of feeding (something he still does- have fed at least 2hourly at night for the last 3 months).

Have you tried this website? I have found it very useful at times.

Good luck and I hope you work out something that keeps you and your baby happy.

Hi Igly, I'm sorry you're having such a bad time. DD started doing this at a little younger than your ds. Is he getting annoyed waiting for a letdown? It was certainly the case for my dd. Also at that age they get so much more interested in the world around them - feeding isn't high on their list of priorities! I've found using a dummy to calm before and during feeds works wonders - I stick it in just as she pulls off.

Try feeding in a really calm environment - I find feeding just as she's waking up works well as she's most relaxed.

Best of luck, I hope you manage to continue but don't beat yourself up if you've had enough!

Thanks Paranoid, I've checked out the website and fingers crossed it will get better.

picante - I tried expressing first then feeding but he was having none of it still. I can get DS to feed asleep but as soon as he wakes up, that's it, no more!!