Guardian article on EBF

[Bumperlicious]

Here.

Not the usual knee jerk reaction but still finishes with:

'I'm more swayed by one mother who stopped breastfeeding her 14-month-old for the simple reason that "once they're old enough to walk across a room and ask for it, I think it's probably time to stop."'

Thesecondcoming - My Mum BF all 3 of her children til about 10 months when we all apparently had nursing strikes and she decided that she would stop and we all went on to cows milk. I think in her head she figured we had all decided to stop and she went along quite happily with that.
My first DC went on a nursing strike at 10 months and initially I decided to stop also, but found it very hard and when I put him back to the breast he fed again. No forcing involved. I then went on to feed him til he was 12 months old.
I have just stopped finished feeding my second DC also at 12 months.
This is my line. Part of me really wanted to carry on, but I had a fear of starting to resent it and having real trouble weaning a toddler which would be traumatic for both of us.
I think it totally cultural and if I was surrounded by women who EBF, if it was the norm I guess, I would have liked to carry on.

Yes thesecondcoming my situation is different. I guess my point is at what age does it make a difference? There will be a grey area where it will do no harm to stop but if someone wants to carry on, a specific age shouldn't be a reason not to.

I'm just reading Ann Sinnot's very good response to the misrepresentations in the article.

I am loving Ann Sinott's comments- isn't the internet a wonderful thing? Revealing that article for the the worthless bit of journalism-lite we suspect it to be. I'm not surprised that the newspapers are struggling to sell copy.

duchesse it amazes me that newspapers patronise readers and rarely bother with investigative thorough journalism. A shame!

I have a question: is it possible to bf when the child is losing their milk teeth? My dd1 lost her first milk teeth at age five and it occurred to me (although maybe I read it somewhere) that she would have lost her sucking reflex if she had still been bfing.

One thing these articles fail to mention (for all their talk about sexual feelings when bfing) is just how normal bfing feels when you are sat their feeding your child.

Is it just me, but I was more interested in the photo of the family - I thought the 10 year old boy was a girl.

Thanks for posting the link. Very interesting!!

I am of the opinion myself that Mums should feed for as long as the child wants to. I breastfed my twins for 13 mths when one gave up, now think it was probably only a feeding strike! Anyway didn't last much longer after that and whilst I found it nice to have my freedom back, I really missed it and regretted not trying to carry on with the other one at least!

Am expecting baby no 3 so we'll have to see what happens!

This article felt disappointing in it's undercurrent of judgement towards EBF, summed up by the last comment. Will try and check out the authors response on website. I agree that it's not something that you set out to do but if it continues to feel beneficial for both the child , mother and the whole family then why stop it?

My ds1 fed til 18 months and naturally self weaned but after briefly having formula never went on to cows milk at all.. It was such a lovely connection we had and I'm sure both missed it in some way for a while but it felt right to stop. When dd2 was born he wanted another try when he was 2.4 and he giggled and said that tastes wierd and didn't bother again.

My dd2 is now 3.8 and still going for it big time. I keep wondering if she'll self wean but this is looking less and less likely. This is fine with me for now, although I do have my moments when I get irritated by her trying to tune into the world service with the other nipple..especially with sharp nails!

DD2 has learning disability , epilepsy and a serious life limiting condition involving multiple tumours in her body, mostly the brain. She is non verbal but is just about walking, if unsteadily! I have been in so many situations in hospitals where I've been surrounded by other mothers trying to comfort their children with complex medical conditions and I have been so thankful that breastfeeding offers dd2 instant comfort, nourishment, and a good dose of oxytocin which calms us both down, because of course we both get a dose of it. Nurses have always been surprisingly ok with this although it feels less and less comfortable on wards/waiting rooms/A&E.. One nurse said oh thank goodness you can plug her in and calm her down.. I can then sit and be with her in such a close intimate way and I see other mothers pacing up and down the corridors rocking their heavy toddlers and feel glad I chosen our way of coping with the situation. It works for us as a family in so many ways.

Taking care of her is very challenging and at the end of a shitty day of tension and stress I know we can sit and she'll feed and it all just fades away in that moment.. She often falls asleep and it's often the most special loving time of our day..

I don't know how or when I will stop but I'll have to at some stage, probably when she loses her sucking reflex and yes that often co-incides with the loss of milk teeth but can go beyond that I understand. If anyone out there has any experience or knowledge of EBF with special needs children.. Be interested to hear.. Can feel quite isolating at times..

Sorry for long post but wanted to voice some of my feelings about the whole issue..

I don't think it's anybodies else's business how parents decide to feed their kids to be honest. There's a baseline right - you feed them, you look after them, above that everything else is gravy.

I tandem feed, and yes my eldest still asks for milk about once a month and I'm fine with that. Tis bugger all to do with any of you.

But while I agree not to criticise the slop babyfood users and the formula feeders (and I'm actually not judging the formula feeding parents - it's bloody hard to be a long term breastfeeder and had I not been bloody stubborn I'd probably have given up sooner than this through sheer disapproval and pressure), I think I have the right to not be judged accordingly by the 'other side'.

DJAngel your post made me cry - I am preggers and hormonal - sounds like such a godsend for you. When DD was 13 months she had to have general anesthetic, it was wonderful to be able to breastfeed her afterwards, calm her down and have her drift off to sleep in my arms, nothing else would have worked as well.

I never thought about ebf before I had dd, never entered my consciousness. When she came along I was too concerned about whether I would make it to 6 weeks to consider when I would like to stop. When everyone irl had weaned and boob was dd's favorite thing in the world I thought it might never end! I would have felt the need to wean at 12 months if I hadn't found MN I'm sure. BFing for us ended when I fell pregnant again when she had just turned two. It felt like a mutural decision, she stopped asking, feeds got very short and she just suddenly wasn't interested. She has asked for booboo since but very rarely, she has only been weaned a month, but I am saying no because I really don't want to and with sickness worry that I don't have the calories to spare. I enjoyed it and I'm glad it lasted the time it did but I am also pleased to have my body back, even if it is temporary

I wonder who the owner of the final comment was, such that Emma Cook holds them in higher regard than not only Ann Sinnot with all her research, but also the World Health Organization.

I'm relieved that although I am breastfeeding a nearly two year old, it isn't yet disgusting because he's still non-verbal

DJAngel, that was a really interesting post and it is lovely that you are able to easily confort your DD2 with a breastfeed.

I read it yesterday too and was rather at the walk/talk thing too. Bloody stupid.

Should I have stopped giving ds cows milk when he was able to ask for it too? Makes no sense. People should do it as long as they want.

I found the article pretty irritating, though possibly less irritating than secondcomings' comments.

Dd had a feeding strike at around 11 months. I never forced my breast back into her mouth! I simply wondered if, seeing as from one day to the next she didn't want any breast at all, there was something else happening. It coincided with her moving into her own room and I understood quickly that it was her way of letting me know how angry she was. I gave us a week. I simply offered her breast milk at every usual feed time and if she wanted it fine, if not fine. After 5 days she started feeding again. Had she not we'd have stopped there (I only planned to feed for 12 mo anyway) but I knew there was something else happening. Feeding strikes are not pleasant but the outcome isn't necessarily an end to bfing.

I don't like the "I have been told..." stuff. It's your body, your baby. People tell other people all kinds if shite about child rearing. If you felt it was the right time to stop fine. Just know that yes, lots of people work through feeding strikes. It ain't easy but it isn't that hard either.

I am Ms Angry tonight but the comments about how the woman looked have annoyed me too. People are always amazed that I am still feeding, and lots of people were amazed that I bfed in the first place for more than a few weeks. I like clothes and fashion and don't look like peoples' perception of a breastfeeding mother. It's so sad. I bfed whenever and wherever dd wanted it until about 9-12 months. Now I often bow to (perceived) pressure and say "let's wait until we get home".

I bf my 20mo old dd and it's no big deal at all.

The article cites:-

"At one point she mentions a 16-year-old boy who was regularly fed by his mother and cites examples of even older children. She says breastfeeding adolescents isn't a practice she would dismiss out of hand."

"I wouldn't pre-judge," she says and cites a historical example she found during her research, of a daughter in her early 20s, "suckled" by her mother for "comfort" during a bereavement."

my children have been asking for milk since they were born

kd73 the author says in the comments below the article that stuff about adolescents is mis-quoted and taken out of context (what a surprise)

Some of the anti extended bf comments are very naive. Extended breastfeeding has many benefits healthwise for the older baby/toddler. I quote some medical research:

"In fact, some immune factors in breastmilk that protect the baby against infection are present in greater amounts in the second year of life than in the first."

[http://www.breastfeedingmums.com/dr_jack_newman_breastfeeding_a_toddler.htm]